Double Standards

[Moxey]

Don't often use this section but something just been getting me wound up lately.

A female friend of mine who I've been quite close with for a few years recently started discussing more about her bedroom antics that she gets up to with her boyfriend(s), she's always been a very laddish girl hence why have always been good mates with her but have never actually thought about what she does with her partners etc

Lately she told me that she's given a few of her bfs head, at the time didn't really pay much attention but later on I noticed I couldn't even look her in the eye when talking to her and eventually couldn't even think of anything to say (rarely ever happens with her banter is always pretty good), dunno why it should bother me when hanging around with the lads never get bothered about when they mention who they were eating out the other night or what other sick shit they got up to (quite alot) if anything its just factored into the banter.

Just feel like a tit for even letting it get to me, as she says to me 'just think of me as one of the lads', not difficult to do with her personality and taste in music.

Anybody else ever had dilemnas like this where you think your losing a friend over something stupid, personally feel like I need a cup of MTFU, I know well what most women go on like how she does just always tried to put her outside of that group.
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Current: 02 FZS 1000 Some Bike Pics...
'I was too busy paying attention to pay attention'

[mrtEE]

Jealous of not getting head from her?

[Moxey]

Yeah probably
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Current: 02 FZS 1000 Some Bike Pics...
'I was too busy paying attention to pay attention'

[Frost]

It's weird i guess. You should have just continued conversation in another direction then come to terms with it in your own time?
I have quite a few female friends, sometimes i'll be out with a few of them, then more of their mates will turn up, also female. Before i know it it's me and 10 girls and i find myself sat on the sidelines listening to some very odd conversations without really knowing what to say. I guess it's exactly what happens when you drag a girlfriend down the pub and end up meeting up with the lads and talking about things from a blokes point of view

[Moxey]

Eventually did start talking to her again when got back to hers so wasn't just awkward silence for the rest of the night, usually whenever I do go to see her its just us two for a couple of hours, on the rare occasion her lass mates are around she's surprisingly quiet.

She's always been very frank about things so not really a surprise that it came up just weird that it took a few years, thinking about it though I have mentioned a few of my own experiences with her over the years and never thought about that

Don't think I really want to see her anytime soon but got to go through and pick up spare helmet from hers before she goes back to uni so see how that goes.
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Current: 02 FZS 1000 Some Bike Pics...
'I was too busy paying attention to pay attention'

[CaNsA]

Moxey, dude, u know what you need to do in order for you to chill out?

[Pete.]

You say she's always been frank about things so why not approach it in a way she understands. Tell her that her recent accounts have stirred some emotions that have left you confused about where you and her stand and ask her what SHE thinks you should do about it.


























































Then get yer cock out just in case
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a.k.a 'Geri'

132.9mph off and walked away. Gear is good, gear is good, gear is very very good

[stinkwheel]

Discuss honsetly and frankly that it makes you feel uncomfortable when she discusses things like that with you...


Then say "No really, I'm wearing tight trousers." *whip it out* "Look, a cat couldn't scratch it.".
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“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.”
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.

[Rogerborg]

Mates don't cock-tease mates.
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Biking is 1/20th as dangerous as horse riding.
GONE: HN125-8, LF-250B, GPz 305, GPZ 500S, Burgman 400 // RIDING: F650GS (800 twin), Royal Enfield Bullet Electra 500 AVL, Ninja 250R because racebike

[colin1]

This to me sounds like the kind of girl who all her friends are men and she doesnt have any female friends.

She may be deliberately playing games or it could be completely unconscious.
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colin1 is officially faster than god

[N cee thirty]

https://uk.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_100/107_dating_advice.html

she one of these ? haha
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'00 Aprilia RS50 > '92 Honda CG > '99 Yamaha Fazer > '91 Yamaha RXS > '79 Suzuki X5 > 01' Honda Cg > 07' Honda Cg > 82' Kawasaki Z200 > suzuki gsxr 400 gk73a > honda vfr 400 NC30 Mod 2 Passed 09/06/2011

Jewlio Iglesias wrote: I actually did vote BNP once

[Moxey]

Can always count on BCF to rationalise things and cheer me up

Don't think she was cock teasing I kind of lead the conversation down that way out of curiosity and didn't like what I heard I guess, and she's never owed me any money; gave me twice as much petrol money as I needed the other day for taking her out on the bike.

She makes a better bloke than a bird just a shame she has nice tits (after that Danny 125 incident no there won't be pics.....well maybe later )
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Current: 02 FZS 1000 Some Bike Pics...
'I was too busy paying attention to pay attention'

[Moxey]

Lol its possible

'he hasn't tried to fuck me in 4 years, oh he must be gay'
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Current: 02 FZS 1000 Some Bike Pics...
'I was too busy paying attention to pay attention'

[mr jamez]

Talking to your male friends about shagging is no problem, because at no point consciously or unconsciously have you thought about shagging them. No tension of any kind (unless they're shagging your little sister/wife/mum...)

I wouldn't talk about intimate details even in a jokey way to a female friend, even one I had slept with. You're more protective over her, possibly envious of random blokes getting their oats and their is always the possibility of having 'feelings' beyond friendship, however shallow they may be!

Anyway, why the fuck would you want to hear about some other blokes cock and how juicy it was I'd make an agreement not to talk about stuff like that!
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NSR 125F > BROS 400 > NC30 > BROS 400 > Trumpet S4 > '97 VFR 750

[Handsome]

Sounds like she's bored with the way her life is currently going so she trys to me matey with you by talking how she thinks she should to keep your interest...

You on the other hand are bored with her flapping her gums on the same subject, hence the distance...

Or she could be a closet butch lesbian, seeing as she's quiet around women and brash and course around men, she's confused so she talks the way she thinks the current crop of friends are expexting her to talk...

Just punch her in the tits and be done with it...
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Previous Bikes...Honda NSR 125 RR...Kawasaki Zephyr 550...Suzuki SV 1000 S...Yamaha FZ8...Current Bike...Suzuki GSX-R 750...

[Clanger]

FWIW, she might be so comfortable in your company now, that after 4years she thinks you don't want to get in her knickers, she can chat to you like a mate.

I think you need to either sort your head out and get over it...feel flattered that she would treat you like her best mate and roll with it. Or like someone before said, be perfectly frank/honest and say the intimate chat is a bit weird for you.

I do not think she is being a cock-tease. She is just sharing with her mate, as women do. Talking about everything is not considered weird in a female world.
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[Rogerborg]

[J0Al1]

I assume that feelings get in the way and make double standdards without the person meaning too....


One of my X's didn not think anyone should be friends with or be in contact with any of their X's, how ever much of a one night stand they were.... Yet when we split he wanted to be friends


I'm not sure I would want to hear about my male friend experiences of going down - might make me wretch.

[DrDonnyBrago]

Right so a girl talks about giving head and you get emotional...

https://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2010/09/05/magazine/05FOB-onlanguage/05FOB-onlanguage-t_CA0-articleLarge.jpg



I'm sure she wouldn't cringe if you said you chew the tuna kebab from time to time . I have had some pretty vile conversations with female friends without any intention of giving them one, if you genuinely feel uncomfortable talking about then say so, otherwise a healthy dose of MTFU should suffice .





On a mildly similar note, a mate of mine told me that he was gay and that he was a taker all in one sentence... got to admit that kinda threw me for a second.

[Moxey]

^Cheers for that

Things sorted itself out eventually just learned to appreciate that shes a total slag but still my mate (some other details came up that don't want to mention that gave me this opinion).

But I have to be nice and not say what I think or anything like that whilst she's offering to let me stay at her flat next year when I go to Wales on the bike.

TL;DR I got friend zoned and I might as well make the most of it by mooching off of her hospitality.
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Current: 02 FZS 1000 Some Bike Pics...
'I was too busy paying attention to pay attention'

[DrDonnyBrago]

[st3v3]

Meh, I have some lass mates that tell me about their intimacies as much as lad mates, not an issue.

Infact, my best mate's missus was telling me tonight in the same room as my best mate how their sex life is, and stuff..

I felt uncomfortable for him, but feel cool enough i'm 'trusted' with such info.

Tell her stuff back and be alright with it.
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Roger wrote: Women don't get damp for clingy puppies. Get some better happy pills, hit the gym & buy a medallion the size of a dinner plate. Job done