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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: 14:56 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Ask Jesus! Reply with quote
Though as I'm here might as well offer my wisdom, any questions anyone?
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If you ate Stephen Hawking, would that count as one of your "five a day" portions?
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Whosthedaddy
Super Spammer



Joined: 11 Dec 2005
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PostPosted: 15:02 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Wheres Elvis?
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Current : MSX 125 Past : CBR 900RR Monkeybike : c50 LAC : ZXR750 H2 : FZR600 : ZX7R P3 : YW100 : TRX850: Trophy 900 T309 : GSXR 600 L0: Monkeybike : XJ6S Whosthedaddy
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: 15:05 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Buried. He's dead



Next
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If you ate Stephen Hawking, would that count as one of your "five a day" portions?
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akaDAVE
World Chat Champion



Joined: 01 Sep 2005
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PostPosted: 15:08 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Is it true that you ride a '98 R1?
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GSXR600
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: 15:09 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Are you mad, even Jesus can't handle a '98 R1.

There are only 3 people who can ride one to it's full potential.

Chuck Norris
Mr T
and The Hoff (And that's only cos everything he does is in slow motion.)
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If you ate Stephen Hawking, would that count as one of your "five a day" portions?
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phantomtek
Lil Joe Tek



Joined: 20 May 2005
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PostPosted: 15:12 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi,

Do you really live in South Park?
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killa
Won't Shut Up



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
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PostPosted: 15:14 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Why do you need so much attention?
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Bike:- Yamaha TRX850 | Killas Biking History | Killas Gaming History | Killas autmotive history
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akaDAVE
World Chat Champion



Joined: 01 Sep 2005
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PostPosted: 15:16 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
If you walk on water in socks, do they get wet?
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GSXR600
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: 15:20 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
phantomtek wrote:
Hi,

Do you really live in South Park?


Only in the summer

Quote:
Why do you need so much attention?


I'm an Attention Whore!!!

Quote:
If you walk on water in socks, do they get wet?


Socks with Sandles??? Your mad!!!!
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If you ate Stephen Hawking, would that count as one of your "five a day" portions?
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killa
Won't Shut Up



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
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PostPosted: 15:22 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Do you look back now and think you should have just shut your mouth and got on with manual labour?
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Bike:- Yamaha TRX850 | Killas Biking History | Killas Gaming History | Killas autmotive history
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: 15:25 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
I think I'd have been better waiting a few millenia and opening a show in Vegas
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If you ate Stephen Hawking, would that count as one of your "five a day" portions?
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akaDAVE
World Chat Champion



Joined: 01 Sep 2005
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PostPosted: 15:29 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
The 'peace on earth' thing hasn't really worked out.
What about paying a visit to the middle east and your home town, work some miracles and sort out the mess?

Fair play if you don't want to I can imagine you don't fancy being nailed to a cross again, although I believe the latest method is to cut your head off live on the internet.
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GSXR600
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killa
Won't Shut Up



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
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PostPosted: 15:30 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Jesus_Christ wrote:
I think I'd have been better waiting a few millenia and opening a show in Vegas


So your 'for' gambling now?
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lozzypop1
Certified MILF!



Joined: 04 Jan 2006
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PostPosted: 15:40 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
How come people normally refer to you when displeased with something? (read that is in the sh1t) Confused

And did mary ever tell you who your real father was? (Do you think you'll be appearing on Jeremy Kyle show for a DNA test anytime soon?)
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Funny, I used to hate being spanked as a child!
Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
Karma :
PostPosted: 15:47 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
akaDAVE wrote:
The 'peace on earth' thing hasn't really worked out.
What about paying a visit to the middle east and your home town, work some miracles and sort out the mess?

Fair play if you don't want to I can imagine you don't fancy being nailed to a cross again, although I believe the latest method is to cut your head off live on the internet.


Good point with the cross and beheading thing. Yes i come back, but it really takes it out of you!

It's not my fault they fight. They were only meant to be on the earth for 13 weeks, and each week all the gods would phone in and evict a race of people off the planet.

TV rights fell through though.

Quote:
So your 'for' gambling now?


Of course! Being god like makes a real money spinner!

Quote:
did mary ever tell you who your real father was?


All she said was that there was a party, a lot of mead, and she didn't walk right for about a week.
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killa
Won't Shut Up



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
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PostPosted: 15:52 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Jesus_Christ wrote:
All she said was that there was a party, a lot of mead, and she didn't walk right for about a week.


Drinking, gambling, and the under age sex...

Fuck off Arab
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Bike:- Yamaha TRX850 | Killas Biking History | Killas Gaming History | Killas autmotive history
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DucatiEVO
Could Be A Chat Bot



Joined: 02 Sep 2005
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PostPosted: 15:56 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Was that really your dad in 'Bruce Almighty'?
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aKa: Ducky
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stinkwheel
Bovine Proctologist



Joined: 12 Jul 2004
Karma :
PostPosted: 15:56 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Since you are omnipresent, any ideas where my good 10mm spanner went? I'm using my rusty old one at the moment and it really isn't the same.
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
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PostPosted: 15:56 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
killa wrote:

Fuck off Arab


Your just upset cos you can't grow a beard like mine!
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If you ate Stephen Hawking, would that count as one of your "five a day" portions?
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Fast Jon
Two Stroke Sniffer



Joined: 10 Mar 2006
Karma :
PostPosted: 16:20 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Jesus_Christ wrote:
Your mad!!!!
If you were really the messiah you would know that it is You're mad!!!!
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I had a 98 R1
I thought it was a bit gutless
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Steve H
World Chat Champion



Joined: 18 Oct 2003
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PostPosted: 16:25 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
If you're so 'omnipresent' how come you're not frequenting the other forum that I visit?

www.nomorenails.com

edit - oops should've read stinky's response Embarassed
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Mellow Yellow
The BCF Top TEN - 2010, 2009, 2008, The Original.
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
Karma :
PostPosted: 16:28 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
stinkwheel wrote:
Since you are omnipresent, any ideas where my good 10mm spanner went? I'm using my rusty old one at the moment and it really isn't the same.


Check behind the workbench. It's where most spanners go to hide

Quote:
Was that really your dad in 'Bruce Almighty'?


Nope, he was filming a TV movie special and there was a conflict in the diaries.

We used Morgan Freeman as he's the next best thing. Though his beard could use some work.

Quote:
If you were really the messiah you would know that it is You're mad!!!!


Being the messiah means I'M RIGHT! So there! or is it the're? Wink
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If you ate Stephen Hawking, would that count as one of your "five a day" portions?
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
Karma :
PostPosted: 16:29 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Reply with quote
Steve H wrote:
If you're so 'omnipresent' how come you're not frequenting the other forum that I visit?

www.nomorenails.com

edit - oops should've read stinky's response Embarassed


I do frequent all forums, i just tend to lurk on most of them!
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map
Mr Calendar



Joined: 14 Jun 2004
Karma :
PostPosted: 16:30 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Re: Ask Jesus! Reply with quote
Jesus_Christ wrote:
....any questions anyone?

So, how can I understand women, to know what they're thinking and why?
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...and the whirlwind is in the thorn trees, it's hard for thee to kick against the pricks...
Gibbs, what did Duckie look like when he was younger? Very Happy
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Jesus_Christ
Spanner Monkey



Joined: 25 Jul 2006
Karma :
PostPosted: 16:33 - 25 Jul 2006    Post subject: Re: Ask Jesus! Reply with quote
map wrote:
So, how can I understand women, to know what they're thinking and why?


Hell, even my dad can't do that.
especially when they're bleeding
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Old Thread Alert!

The last post was made 20 years, 52 days ago. Instead of replying here, would creating a new thread be more useful?
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