Locks n stuff

Porterboi · L Plate Warrior Joined: 01 Mar 2016 Karma :

Ok i am a chef and work long hours. I normally use my mcycle but have lost the key to ignition barrel and anchor. I can screw driver tge ignition barrel but the anchor lock might be difficult. As i work long hours i want to be able to remove the anchor lock by busting it silently. I normally set off around 2 am and in one of the houses there is a big dog. The anchor lock is made by oxford. How best to silently get the lock off without waking neighbours as bike is in alley between 2 houses. Its on a gpz 500s.

Evil Hans · World Chat Champion Joined: 08 Nov 2015 Karma :

Acid.
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Triumph Sprint ST 1050. And it's Red.

Porterboi · L Plate Warrior Joined: 01 Mar 2016 Karma :

What grade. Also is it battery acid

Nobby the Bastard · Harley Gaydar Joined: 16 Aug 2013 Karma :

Fuck off great angle grinder
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trevor saxe-coburg-gotha:"Remember this simple rule - scooters are for men who like to feel the breeze on their huge, flapping cunt lips."
Triumph Sprint ST 1050

Porterboi · L Plate Warrior Joined: 01 Mar 2016 Karma :

Yes but it needs to be done silently. I dont want the rotty barking or neighbours seeing whats going on. Iama good neighbour. Also why the red dot on the topic nobby for abuse. I asked for some help

Lord Percy · World Chat Champion Joined: 03 Aug 2012 Karma :

Not sure if this is a genuine person thinking he can slyly ask for advice on how to steal a motorbike, or a really poor attempt at humour.

andyscooter · World Chat Champion Joined: 30 May 2009 Karma :

If it's Oxford use a butter knife

Or a pair of sissors
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gilera runner vxr200 (chavped)
if its spelt wrong its my fat fingers and daft auto correct on my tablet

Porterboi · L Plate Warrior Joined: 01 Mar 2016 Karma :

Ok thanks for the time waste i thought you could help guess i was wrong

Evil Hans · World Chat Champion Joined: 08 Nov 2015 Karma :

Was that a flounce? Cool!
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Triumph Sprint ST 1050. And it's Red.

Commuter_Tim · World Chat Champion Joined: 09 May 2013 Karma :

Show a google street view of the bike you plan to stea...Silently Unlock and your National Insurance number and we will tell you.

For the record I went with "abusive" karma rating as there was nothing for "Thieving Pikey Scum".
Even bike thieves get days off, you don't eh?
A "Good neighbour" also wouldn't have any problem with someone seeing them in the act or approaching them.
Even if you worked 14 hours shifts, you would be back around 4pm, that too late eh?

I don't know about anyone else but I feel slightly re-assured that some bike thieves are this idiotic.
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The above post is most likely nonsensical.

I ride a Bandit 600... badly.

swampy · World Chat Champion Joined: 04 Aug 2004 Karma :

Noob turns up and posts in the correct section of the forum. Given thats never happened in the 15 odd years that BCF has been going, I'm definitely calling troll...
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"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me." Hunter S Thompson
"Faster, faster, faster, until the thrill of speed overcomes the fear of death..." Hunter S Thompson

Ariel Badger · Super Spammer Joined: 02 Dec 2006 Karma :

Does your bike have an alarm? You may need to ask us how to disable that as well Mr. Green

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Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

Rogerborg · nimbA Joined: 26 Oct 2010 Karma :

Surely your sex dungeon contains a wide variety of restraints, Tritey? Have you tried some of the keys from them?
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Biking is 1/20th as dangerous as horse riding.
GONE: HN125-8, LF-250B, GPz 305, GPZ 500S, Burgman 400 // RIDING: F650GS (800 twin), Royal Enfield Bullet Electra 500 AVL, Ninja 250R because racebike

ScaredyCat · World Chat Champion Joined: 19 May 2012 Karma :

Thieving pedboi asks how to steal motorcycle....

Pass the popcorn

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Honda CBF125 ➝ NC700X
Honda CBF125 ↳ Speed Triple

Hefty · Could Be A Chat Bot Joined: 25 Jun 2013 Karma :

Chuck the dog a lamb chop. Also wear a high-vis vest as you'll look like less of a teef Thumbs Up

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'13 Honda CBF125 // '99 Suzuki SV650s // '98 Honda CB600F Hornet

Polarbear · Super Spammer Joined: 24 Feb 2007 Karma :

^^^^ Good call. Wear you 'POLITE' hi vis and the Rotty will think you are a copper and leave you alone. Thumbs Up

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Triumph Trophy Launch Edition

pepperami · Super Spammer Joined: 17 Jan 2010 Karma :

Silver_Fox · World Chat Champion Joined: 03 Jun 2015 Karma :

"Boi" in the username, as in Pedboi? 100% trollolololol
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CBR600 F3 FV
CG125

zico · Nitrous Nuisance Joined: 28 Sep 2015 Karma :

If you masturbate vigorously beside the bike plod will turn up in no time, you can then ask them for advice.
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Suzuki SV650S

pepperami · Super Spammer Joined: 17 Jan 2010 Karma :

zico · Nitrous Nuisance Joined: 28 Sep 2015 Karma :

*vomit*
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Suzuki SV650S

gerg · Borekit Bruiser Joined: 09 Mar 2016 Karma :

Hold on, your name is "porterboi" you said you were a chef not a porter!?... and what restaurant needs their dishes cleaned at 2AM

The plot thickens.

MCN · Super Spammer Joined: 22 Jul 2015 Karma :

Black Spandex one-zie, pumps and a black Clalabava (so no one sees you).
A 1.5HP 50/60Hz 110-220 Diesel Generator (for lights and power tools).

One of those hydraulic chain-busting tools.

And a machine gun to deter any nosey bastirts.

Job Jobbed. Thumbs Up

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Disclaimer: The comments above may be predicted text and not necessarily the opinion of MCN.