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My balls work...

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DrDonnyBrago
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PostPosted: 22:29 - 04 Oct 2016    Post subject: My balls work... Reply with quote

I impregnated my wife, baby girl due in 7 weeks...

Tips? Shocked
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grr666
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PostPosted: 22:33 - 04 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well done Thumbs Up Now open a top secret savings account.
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Itchy
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PostPosted: 22:36 - 04 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Buy some new toys. Because you're not going to see any of your pay cheque for the next 18 or so years Very Happy
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Howling TerrorOutOfOffice
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PostPosted: 22:36 - 04 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sleep.
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Ste
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PostPosted: 22:40 - 04 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Don't tell BCF that you're going to have a daughter. Thumbs Up
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CaNsA
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PostPosted: 22:46 - 04 Oct 2016    Post subject: Re: My balls work... Reply with quote

DrDonnyBrago wrote:
I impregnated my wife, baby girl due in 7 weeks...

Tips? Shocked


due in 7 weeks... when did you find out?

Is it to late for...
https://i.imgur.com/7r0QDQv.png
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Alpineandy
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PostPosted: 23:02 - 04 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm with CaNsA on this one.
Alternatively you can make a run for it. Cool
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DrDonnyBrago
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PostPosted: 23:18 - 04 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cheers Rolling Eyes
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dodsi
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PostPosted: 05:48 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Routine, routine, routine...

The sooner you are in one then the easier it becomes.
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Pete.
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PostPosted: 05:55 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Re: My balls work... Reply with quote

DrDonnyBrago wrote:

Tips? Shocked


Quote:

Routine, routine, routine...


This, plus crash about, play music, park crib in front of washing machine when it's on.

Unless you enjoy having the house bawled down every time someone drops a pin that is Smile
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yen_powell
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PostPosted: 06:15 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ear plugs. Takes the edge off the screaming.
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instigator.
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PostPosted: 06:16 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Accept the fact that you will lose a lot of your freedom for a good chunk of the first year. I found that part the hardest to accept.

Holidays are no longer what you used to call holidays. Laughing
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nowhere.elysium
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PostPosted: 07:12 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Congratulations mate.

As has been indicated, get the sprog used to noise, get into as much of a routine as you can, and be prepared to feel like you're in Gitmo for the first year or so. Beyond that, you'll find the whole process quite entertaining after a while (in a ridiculously high-stress sort of way). You'll find that you become weirdly over-aware of danger for a while, too - just roll with it. Small children are tiny self-destructive idiots, and will find every possible way to damage themselves, including ways that were hitherto thought impossible. Childproof everything you can, but just learn to deal with the fact that they will bump, scrape, cut and generally try to maim themselves - it's something you can't stop entirely.

Just do us all a favour and don't go down the Nobby path, whereby you spawn multiple times and then spend every social event lecturing people at great length on your vasectomy. No-one wants to know.
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DrDonnyBrago
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PostPosted: 07:24 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Re: My balls work... Reply with quote

The two things I'm dreading are the noise (my house is wonderfully quiet, I'll miss it) and that I can no longer be a selfish git with my time/money.

Other than that, looking forward to meeting bragospawn!

Oh and yeah.... Child friendly holidays look tragic. Wife only gets time off during school holidays, so holidays become horrendously expensive visits to a child safari - haven't been on holiday for years Sad .
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recman
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PostPosted: 07:31 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wipe from front to back and dress her in neutral clothing so you can shout at strangers who think she's a boy.
It's a good release after a night of very broken sleep.

Oh yeah and forget all this me me me shit.
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grr666
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PostPosted: 07:43 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Re: My balls work... Reply with quote

DrDonnyBrago wrote:
haven't been on holiday for years Sad .

Go have fun for the next 7 weeks.
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BTTD
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PostPosted: 07:48 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

I found...

Labour: Personally, I stayed away from the business end and was there for hand holding, moral support, mopping sweaty brow (genuinely) and highlighting when the assistant midwife was putting a drip in badly, and when it fell out and sprayed blood everywhere.
I did not cut the cord. It's a thick very hard to cut rubber like consistency which I was happy to let the professional sort out.
Some people like to be right in there catching the baby and afterbirth etc. That wasn't for me. Have a think about it and decide what you want to do.

First few weeks are the most brutal, but also brilliant. There's a lot to get a handle on while being very tired, but you get used to it and pretty soon you'll wonder why you ever needed sleep (this may be a slight exaggeration).

It all changes every couple of weeks or so as they grow so whatever is being awkward at one point in time will be a distant memory next month.

After the first month or two I slept several week nights in the spare room so that I could actually get some sleep and function at work. I then did some weekend night shifts to give the wife bit of a rest.

Every baby is different, they each have their quirks and preferences. What worked for your friends babies may not work for you, so take on board all the advice and work out your own way.

Other tips: have a car with a big boot and rear doors. A mini is doable but not great. My wife loved her mini and stuck with it for the first year until her back and shoulders were complaining at the increasing weight of the little monster in his seat.
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colink98
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Joined: 27 Jun 2016
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PostPosted: 07:53 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is BCF and no one has asked the OP if he is sure his balls are working ?

im new so just trying to judge where the line is....
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andyscooter
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PostPosted: 07:58 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

not sure what they suggest for bottles now but we found it easier to make up bottles of water and add the milk powder to it when needed

the powder we measured into little containers you can get so all done ready
this was brilliant at 3 o clock in the morning when baby is screaming as its hungry Rolling Eyes
at the time they suggested making one bottle as you needed it so you had to boil a kettle then add the powder then cool the bottle again

we would do about 4 at a time so had enough for most of the day

only down side was she wouldn't eat warm food for a few years and had to be room temp Sick


congrats Laughing
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recman
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PostPosted: 08:02 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

ColinK98 wrote:
This is BCF and no one has asked the OP if he is sure his balls are working ?

im new so just trying to judge where the line is....


You're nowhere near yet.
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Alpineandy
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PostPosted: 08:40 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

yen_powell wrote:
Ear plugs. Takes the edge off the screaming.


I find this also helps for the conception... Laughing
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Last edited by Alpineandy on 08:42 - 05 Oct 2016; edited 1 time in total
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Saraya
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PostPosted: 08:41 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

Congrats. Very Happy
Don't be offended if you do the back rubbing, hand holding and give motivational comments during labour - only to have 'frack off' snarled at you. There's comes a point when a woman just needs to retreat into herself and having a tearful bloke exclaim, "I bloody love you - you can do this!" becomes kind of... pesky.

If you can cook, do some batch cooking now of curry, Bolognese, lasagne, stew etc and fill your freezer. Home made decent microwave meals are life savers.

Do you have enough baby-grows? If you said yes, you're wrong - get more. The same applies to Fairy washing powder and muslin cloths.

You should have the hospital bag packed by now. Add one of your own tops and undies to it. Dad's often get over looked here and it will be blooming hot in there.
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Alpineandy
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PostPosted: 08:41 - 05 Oct 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote

ColinK98 wrote:
This is BCF and no one has asked the OP if he is sure his balls are working ?
im new so just trying to judge where the line is....


I think we've all assumed he's getting it DNA tested within the 1st hour of it's arrival... Laughing
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