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Team building.

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iooi
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PostPosted: 21:27 - 06 Dec 2017    Post subject: Re: Team building. Reply with quote

Ribenapigeon wrote:
My employer wants ideas for a team building day. Shocked

Help!


More holidays Smile

Double the wages Laughing

Anything else, unless it's in works time FEEK OFF..

Do you get paid to make management decisions?
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Suntan Sid
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PostPosted: 12:53 - 07 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Rogerborg wrote:
All of your "team" get a common performance review and identical pay rise, you say?


Some years ago, I had accepted a redundancy package, I had a leaving date some months in the future.
A performance review reared it's ugly, bullshit, head.
The knowledge that I was leaving and the effect that would have on how I would approach the form filling seemed to have escaped my manager.
Apparently the responses I gave were not was expected.
I was told if I didn't edit my responses, (to fall in line with those of my fellow team members), that the whole team's performance bonus might be in jeopardy, (some mild peril, right there).
Given I was leaving and the bonus was a whopping 200 ponds for the whole fcukin' year, I didn't bother.

Should have sent me on a team building course I guess!
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M.C
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PostPosted: 17:46 - 07 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Suntan Sid wrote:
Rogerborg wrote:
All of your "team" get a common performance review and identical pay rise, you say?


Some years ago, I had accepted a redundancy package, I had a leaving date some months in the future.
A performance review reared it's ugly, bullshit, head.
The knowledge that I was leaving and the effect that would have on how I would approach the form filling seemed to have escaped my manager.
Apparently the responses I gave were not was expected.
I was told if I didn't edit my responses, (to fall in line with those of my fellow team members), that the whole team's performance bonus might be in jeopardy, (some mild peril, right there).
Given I was leaving and the bonus was a whopping 200 ponds for the whole fcukin' year, I didn't bother.

Should have sent me on a team building course I guess!

We have an anonymous survey* where the results get worse each year Laughing They've stopped trying to spin the results, basically that the companies shite and the managers are all Stalin, and only care about participation levels so avoiding said survey (and general reviews) is the new game.

*far from being a cathartic experience it's a yearly reminder of how much you hate the job/employer, I genuinely have no idea what good it's meant to do.
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asta1
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PostPosted: 17:58 - 07 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

OP is near brum right?

We did off-road gokarting here
https://www.walker-adams.co.uk/

followed by a boozy night on the town for the last team building thing.

Actually really fun, plus I got to pelt my boss with gravel so win/win.

Team building is mostly bullshit, but as long as it's on a workday its better than being in the office.
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Suntan Sid
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PostPosted: 19:01 - 07 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

M.C wrote:
...........far from being a cathartic experience it's a yearly reminder of how much you hate the job/employer, I genuinely have no idea what good it's meant to do.


IMO, it's a waste of time, literally, it took a whole day to fill in the forms, a whole days work missed.
There is a major flaw in the whole process, in that the it is geared towards some kind of career progression/advancement.
It completely ignores people who are quite happy in their role, people who come in day after day, do a good job then go home and other than being paid at the end of each month have no other interest in the work environment.
As I said in my case it boiled down to a fiver a week bonus, whopeefuckingdo, I'd have paid a fiver a week just for the pleasure of winding up a few of the, incompetent, dickheads running the place.
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Jewlio Rides Again LLB
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PostPosted: 19:26 - 07 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

asta1 wrote:
OP is near brum right?

We did off-road gokarting here
https://www.walker-adams.co.uk/

followed by a boozy night on the town for the last team building thing.

Actually really fun, plus I got to pelt my boss with gravel so win/win.

Team building is mostly bullshit, but as long as it's on a workday its better than being in the office.


No, OP is in Scotchland.
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asta1
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PostPosted: 19:39 - 07 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Jewlio Rides Again LLB wrote:


No, OP is in Scotchland.


Huh, my mistake. Not sure where I got that impression from then..
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M.C
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PostPosted: 21:43 - 07 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Suntan Sid wrote:
There is a major flaw in the whole process, in that the it is geared towards some kind of career progression/advancement.

Same with ours, except they have no intention of anyone progressing, so it really is BS.

Suntan Sid wrote:
As I said in my case it boiled down to a fiver a week bonus, whopeefuckingdo, I'd have paid a fiver a week just for the pleasure of winding up a few of the, incompetent, dickheads running the place.

We get a £20-30 bonus every few months for meeting team targets, unsurprisingly no one's really bothered about them. The worst thing they did was remove individual targets/pay rises, why would you put in the extra effort when you're getting paid the same as some other lazy c**t.
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Ribenapigeon
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PostPosted: 09:59 - 08 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Rogerborg wrote:
All of your "team" get a common performance review and identical pay rise, you say?


I did suggest once tbat given "the challenging funding environment" charities face that maybe we should become a cooperative. Set pay scales as no more or less than 20% of average wage. You can imagine the reaction.

Ive suggested we go glider flying.
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Ste
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PostPosted: 10:02 - 08 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ribenapigeon wrote:
Ive suggested we go glider flying.

Laughing

Sounds fun but what's the team building angle on it? Laughing
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Polarbear
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PostPosted: 11:22 - 08 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ste wrote:
Ribenapigeon wrote:
Ive suggested we go glider flying.

Laughing

Sounds fun but what's the team building angle on it? Laughing


2 people in a plane, 1 parachute, the winner (survivor) gets the promotion?
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Rogerborg
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PostPosted: 11:28 - 08 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Team scrapheap-challenge-stylee builds a glider, manager gets/has to fly it.

Extreme 360 review.
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bamt
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PostPosted: 12:30 - 08 Dec 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ah yes, reminds me of the (apocryphal) story of software team leads going on a quality training course. The course trainer asks them to put up their hand if they'd go on a plane where their team had written the avionics software. Only one guy puts up his hand. The trainer asks him if he really has that much faith in his team.

"I'd be perfectly safe", says the team lead, "If my team wrote it, that plane isn't going anywhere.".
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