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Todays - What grinds my gears *ARCHIVE*

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Tracey Suntan-King
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PostPosted: 11:53 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

FGS! I just wanted to search "jewelled sandals" on ebay and before I could type the sandal part, it auto-filled "jewelled butt-plug". Shocked

The fabric of society is breaking down I tells ya. Even worse Sid doesnt believe me Wink
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P.
Red Rocket



Joined: 14 Feb 2008
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PostPosted: 12:27 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Courier265 wrote:
1) got overtaken by a bmw cunt, nearly hit me

2) cut up by some NIGGER on a scooter

3) parking ticket

4) fuck all work....

5) nearly ran foreign tourists over because they don't look where they are going.


Oh look, short racist cunt strikes again Mr. Green
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Polarbear
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PostPosted: 13:05 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tracey Suntan-King wrote:
FGS! I just wanted to search "jewelled sandals" on ebay and before I could type the sandal part, it auto-filled "jewelled butt-plug". Shocked

The fabric of society is breaking down I tells ya. Even worse Sid doesnt believe me Wink


I just typed in jewelled sandals and got jewelled sandals (just as an experiment of course Wink ).

You, young lady, are telling Liar Laughing
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chickenstrip
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PostPosted: 13:29 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Polarbear wrote:
Tracey Suntan-King wrote:
FGS! I just wanted to search "jewelled sandals" on ebay and before I could type the sandal part, it auto-filled "jewelled butt-plug". Shocked

The fabric of society is breaking down I tells ya. Even worse Sid doesnt believe me Wink


I just typed in jewelled sandals and got jewelled sandals (just as an experiment of course Wink ).

You, young lady, are telling Liar Laughing


I just typed in jewelled butt plug and am now traumatised for life.
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redwarfie
Derestricted Danger



Joined: 21 Dec 2017
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PostPosted: 16:17 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

chickenstrip wrote:
am now traumatised for life.


Cue Ste posting a link which, when clicked on, will make your state of traumatisedness feel like a peaceful Sunday morning stroll...
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chickenstrip
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PostPosted: 16:23 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

redwarfie wrote:
chickenstrip wrote:
am now traumatised for life.


Cue Ste posting a link which, when clicked on, will make your state of traumatisedness feel like a peaceful Sunday morning stroll...


Don't be silly. Nobody in their right mind clicks on Ste's links.
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THERE'S MILLIONS OF CHICKENSTRIPS OUT THERE!
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Tracey Suntan-King
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PostPosted: 16:32 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

"Bumbling"

ˈbʌmb(ə)lɪŋ,ˈbʌmblɪŋ/

Noun
noun: Jewel-encrusted butt plug

Example: "Tracey's bumblings astounded even the most sophisticated observers"
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chickenstrip
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PostPosted: 16:35 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tracey Suntan-King wrote:
"Bumbling"

ˈbʌmb(ə)lɪŋ,ˈbʌmblɪŋ/

Noun
noun: Jewel-encrusted butt plug

Example: "Tracey's bumblings astounded even the most sophisticated observers"


Shouldn't that be two separate words, or at least hyphenated?
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THERE'S MILLIONS OF CHICKENSTRIPS OUT THERE!
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Sir Clip
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Joined: 08 Jun 2018
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PostPosted: 16:37 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

To be honest, if I had diaorhhea (yay, spelled it without a dictionary!), I would just phone in sick or summat.....it's not sealing with a pitched thread, and ptfe tape, so it would just blow out with more noticable effect, surely?

I suppose that if you suffered from moderate wind, and worked in close proximity to people who would kill you if you farted in there prescence (Yakuza?) it might offer some benefit, but aside from that, why would you need one, a jeweled one ffs?
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P.
Red Rocket



Joined: 14 Feb 2008
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PostPosted: 16:39 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sir Clip wrote:
To be honest, if I had diaorhhea (yay, spelled it without a dictionary!)


I'd grab a dictionary.
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chickenstrip
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PostPosted: 16:41 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sir Clip wrote:
why would you need one, a jeweled one ffs?


Are you suggesting that you find a plugged arse hole to be pretty enough as it is?
I suppose you could just use glitter round the edges.
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stephen_o
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Joined: 02 Aug 2011
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PostPosted: 16:47 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

I close my business on Saturday and started a closing down sale last Thursday afternoon, since then I have been rammed with customers and everyone saying its a shame etc. Where were they a few weeks ago when I was serving 3 people a day? The uplift made me a little part of me wonder about continuing on a half price or cut price basis but there is no way I could make it work with the cost price of stock from video game suppliers. Fifa 19 will be £38.50 + Vat trade to me.

Disappointed.
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P.
Red Rocket



Joined: 14 Feb 2008
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PostPosted: 17:14 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

stephen_o wrote:
I close my business on Saturday and started a closing down sale last Thursday afternoon, since then I have been rammed with customers and everyone saying its a shame etc. Where were they a few weeks ago when I was serving 3 people a day? The uplift made me a little part of me wonder about continuing on a half price or cut price basis but there is no way I could make it work with the cost price of stock from video game suppliers. Fifa 19 will be £38.50 + Vat trade to me.

Disappointed.


What is it you do, video games etc will always be a dying trade as I get all my games online for far less than retail.

Anything that sells mainly physical media will die slowly over the next few years I reckon... online is the world now.
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Freddyfruitba...
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Joined: 20 May 2016
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PostPosted: 18:04 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Skudd wrote:
Went to LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLandudno

I went up there on Sunday in fact, while out on a North Wales Bimble, specifically in order to ride round the Great Orme.

Which was lovely, actually. Gears oiled.
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Ste
Not Work Safe



Joined: 01 Sep 2002
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PostPosted: 18:40 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

redwarfie wrote:
chickenstrip wrote:
am now traumatised for life.


Cue Ste posting a link which, when clicked on, will make your state of traumatisedness feel like a peaceful Sunday morning stroll...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XcsxqAiCjog
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Courier265
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PostPosted: 20:50 - 11 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Paddy. wrote:
Courier265 wrote:
1) got overtaken by a bmw cunt, nearly hit me

2) cut up by some NIGGER on a scooter

3) parking ticket

4) fuck all work....

5) nearly ran foreign tourists over because they don't look where they are going.


Oh look, short racist strikes again Mr. Green


Freedom of speech you hooded Irish turdbucket.
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DrSnoosnoo
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PostPosted: 08:29 - 12 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Who else gets woken up to,

"Quick, get up he's shat on the bed!"
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P.
Red Rocket



Joined: 14 Feb 2008
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PostPosted: 09:07 - 12 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Not Irish you shortarse Laughing
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Skudd
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PostPosted: 16:06 - 12 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tracey Suntan-King wrote:
FGS! I just wanted to search "jewelled sandals" on ebay and before I could type the sandal part, it auto-filled "jewelled butt-plug". Shocked

The fabric of society is breaking down I tells ya. Even worse Sid doesnt believe me Wink


Does the plug fit though?
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Fisty
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PostPosted: 18:39 - 12 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tracey Suntan-King wrote:
Fisty wrote:
Horse Flies. A fucking gain.

Foot swollen and hurts to walk.

https://i.imgur.com/VieJiqo.jpg?1


Soz and all that, but that flip flop is quite girly Wink


It's all I can wear at the mo, not many girlies wear size 12 O'niell flip flops!
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 01:03 - 13 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am desperate for a cupo tea.

I have bought myself a birthday cake due to Esteemed Daughter's gift still not having arrived, and I want a cupo tea to go with it.

The milk, whilst not quite having curdled, tastes sour, despite being in the fridge.

I did not know this until I took a swig of it out of the bottle whilst waiting for the kettle to boil.
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dodsi
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PostPosted: 13:16 - 13 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

DrSnoosnoo wrote:
Who else gets woken up to,

"Quick, get up he's shat on the bed!"


Probably only people who have done something stupid with a newborn baby. like not fitting the nappy on properly and putting it on your bed in the first place.
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Polarbear
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PostPosted: 13:42 - 13 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

dodsi wrote:
DrSnoosnoo wrote:
Who else gets woken up to,

"Quick, get up he's shat on the bed!"


Probably only people who have done something stupid with a newborn baby. like not fitting the nappy on properly and putting it on your bed in the first place.


I've never understood this baby thing (even though I've had my own kids)

They shit on the bed and Mummy bears coos and says 'Isn't he clever'

Puppy shits on the bed, Daddy bear chastises it and chucks it in the garden.

A few weeks later Daddy bear's puppy is house trained. Mummy bears baby still shits on the bed.

Suggests to Mummy bear my training method is better.

Manic Mummy bear screaming words to the effect of 'Get thee behind me Satan'

https://media.giphy.com/media/uzZh2psw4J3ri/giphy.gif
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dodsi
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PostPosted: 14:26 - 13 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

Polarbear wrote:


I've never understood this baby thing (even though I've had my own kids)

They shit on the bed and Mummy bears coos and says 'Isn't he clever'

Puppy shits on the bed, Daddy bear chastises it and chucks it in the garden.

A few weeks later Daddy bear's puppy is house trained. Mummy bears baby still shits on the bed.

Suggests to Mummy bear my training method is better.

Manic Mummy bear screaming words to the effect of 'Get thee behind me Satan'

https://media.giphy.com/media/uzZh2psw4J3ri/giphy.gif


luckily my wife and I are very much on the same page when it comes to parenting. Our daughter is only 8 weeks old so we have a long way to go yet.

Her favourite trick is pissing/shitting as soon as you take the nappy off to change it, neither of us find it 'clever' or adorable. I cant help but find it funny- that or defenestration of the baby.

Plastic covered wedged side changing station FTW.
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Rogerborg
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Joined: 26 Oct 2010
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PostPosted: 14:49 - 13 Jul 2018    Post subject: Reply with quote

dodsi wrote:
Her favourite trick is pissing/shitting as soon as you take the nappy off to change it, neither of us find it 'clever'

YHBT. YHL. HAND.

To be fair, that is actually a pretty smart response.

How clever is your postman?
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