Eye openers

[Sister Sledge]

So now that the warmer weather's here it's bringing out some crazy stuff. No not those rare awesome factory machines - I'm talking those 'projects', 'bobbers' and other 'should fly straight through an MOT' machines we see people selling or building.

This week two caught my eye. (they were moving and so no time for photos)
One of them appeared to be a 100cc 2t trail bike. Probably one of those USA imports we see advertised on the bay. It looked fine but for some stupid reason the owner had put rear shocks on which were far too long. The angle made it look like the front forks had burst and collapsed. The rider could barely ride it due to the angle of the seat leaning forward.

The second bike was bad. It appeared to be a twin 4t of around 500 to 750 cc. I have no idea what looks they were aiming for but will say it had a bit of everything 'trendy'. The lights were the worst. The headlight colour was yellow and all indicators were a deep blood red colour when operating. I also suspect that from the riding position his nuts are now flat like scones.
This bike would never have passed an MOT - either it had none or they made the 'adjustments' after an MOT was carried out.

Is this a new thing that we'll be seeing more of or has it always gone on?
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CCM 404 DS

[Grubscrew]

........and they looked at their hard work and thought “that look will really catch on”.
The horrendous mods people do to bike can be painful to see. I know we all have differing ideas but some really do need to be laughed at.
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FJR1300/CBR1000F

[Easy-X]

"Discretion is the better part of valour" & "Less is more" should be the motivational posters in a lot of workshops!
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Husqvarna Vitpilen 401, Yamaha XSR700, Honda Rebel, Yamaha DT175, Suzuki SV650 (loan) Fazer 600, Keeway Superlight 125, 50cc turd scooter

[Bhud]

Remember all those cars with a blue tint across the windscreen with "KEV AND SHARON" in enormous white letters proclaiming the names of those sat in the front? Go-faster stripes, painted tyre walls, everyone choosing a car in a different colour, etc. Now everyone seems to drive an anonymous bloat-blob in grey (although the fashion is turning to white).

Even though it's changing and becoming a much more conservative culture, bikes seem to still be seen as a socially acceptable way of expressing individuality and personal tastes. You will still find, the further you get away from cities, all sorts of bizarre custom bikes. However, few of these get ridden.

People used to often do a really bad job when working on their cars, as they were all amateurs really, and it was seen as a manly thing to do so everyone had a go. Likewise in the world of bikes, back in the 70s it seemed to be common (going by pics and videos) to fit ape-hangers to whatever moped or bike someone had. And I saw a documentary on the beginnings of the custom chopper scene - the pioneers of that Yankee raked-out minimal chopper/bobber look were basically building deathtraps, and the frames would often collapse at the welds or even along the tubing. Nowadays if you built and sold dangerous bikes with dodgy welds and bits of pipe, you would get the book thrown at you, and there is no shortage of self-righteous and opinionated engineer types willing to jabber on and on on Youtube about "big debates going on in the world of physics at the moment" re: some properties of materials they just found out about, armed with their HNDs from the local poly. That whole customisation scene did in fact exist in the UK (Kent Custom Bike Show, National Chopper Club, etc.) but is becominng seen as socially unacceptable (as socially unacceptable as drink driving), and to young people especially, peer pressure WORKS. So we're seeing the end of that culture.

I always get a chuckle from photos of that guy with the Excalibur movie scenes airbrushed on his tank. Some part of me hopes he hasn't just sprayed over it in gloss black and clear 2-pack, sold it and bought a GS or Street Triple. Because if he has, that's another part of British bike culture that's died. So when I see someone has crudely welded some kind of hard tail to a Japanese IL4, I wouldn't follow in their footsteps personally, but I like their attitude and willingness to give things a go, uninfluenced by others telling them they need to have served half a lifetime as an apprentice or else they will die when their welds give way, and they have no right to make manifest what's in their heads until they've duly suffered and paid their dues like a good Yorkshire protestant. Those early chops didn't all collapse, but they were all a reflection of their creators' personality, and they were all a reflection of the esprit d'epoque, just as much as Kev's Ford Capri in the 70s.

[chickenstrip]

[Sister Sledge]

No no it's OK. I'll accept it!

Badly wended reminds me of two local lads who'd 'fix' villagers cars as a fiddle whilst on the dole. One of the cars they'd repaired crashed on a local tight corner - the only thing that didn't bend of break were the welds they'd done!!

I agree though. I think this will pass. I still see cars in Amble, Northumberland (land that time forgot - they still wear white cotton trousers and shell suits) that are a Vauxhall and have a huge Vauxhall sticker stuck to the side..

If I get the time I'll make a point of stopping at a local bikes stopping point (I'm antisocial and never stop) and will get photos of said sh*te if there's any there.
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CCM 404 DS

[pepperami]

It’s heartbreaking to see some of the abominations some people create.
They take a perfectly decent bike that could be saved and make it look like a junkyard bitsa .

On the other hand , how many of these bikes would just sit in a hedge in a garden or go rotten in the back of a damp garage if owners didn’t do something with them.?
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I am the sum total of my own existence, what went before makes me who I am now!

[Easy-X]

I suppose it's like being single...

Married it's like "You're not going out of the house wearing blue jean with that shirt!"

Without some sort of sanity check these projects tend to run away from the original design ethos.
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Husqvarna Vitpilen 401, Yamaha XSR700, Honda Rebel, Yamaha DT175, Suzuki SV650 (loan) Fazer 600, Keeway Superlight 125, 50cc turd scooter

[stevo as b4]

I've (reluctant to admit it) been watching a YouTube channel recently where they have found a great example of the height of the late 90's Max Power era cars, and they are rescuing it from scrap and hopefully will re-instate all the period modifications and repair the substantial bodykit as a tribute to the era.

I was never into all the neon crap or the extremes of the fast and furious look, but it's funny where nostalgia takes people 20years later.

We actually had more taste with tame stuff like Angel eye and afterburner light clusters and relatively tastefull European bodykits and cars, than those crazy Japs. I wonder if anyone there was ever sent down for stretch for crimes against Japanese cars?

[Grubscrew]

I have to confess, my 80s car had the fur seats, the suns strip across the screen, the pod mounted speakers, the Weller wheels, lowered, the whippy aerial and cb radio.
I’ve now matured and less definitely is more!
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FJR1300/CBR1000F

[Sister Sledge]

[humbucker]

I still look on turning a CX500 into a cafe racer as an act of vandalism.
Conservative was taken, that's why I was called something else. Quite a few things tbh.
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It was easy to ignore the voices in my head until they started making sense.

[grr666]

Mark II Escort 1.3L in orange with self filmed silver windows, furry seat covers and a pull out tape deck. I had some old
home hifi speakers on the parcel shelf with a roll of gaffer tape wedged between them to stop them sliding from
left to right. NRO 748V, I'll never forget that reg, we said at the time that it stood for Not Really Orange.
I was so tempted to roller it matt black but somehow resisted.

Looking back it was a pretty tragic car but it represented my independence way more than having a bike
ever did. @16 a ped just gave me transport, @17 my 125 gave me faster transport. @19 a car gave faster transport
still and somewhere to hang out and smoke dope, get girls on their own (a big shout to High Beech ) plus a means
of getting amps guitars and mates to rehearsal studios. True story, I got 17 producers in 1 week in that car in those heady
pre database days when the roads were still policed by humans and not ANPR. Fucking good job too, I knew a guy
who could get me hand written cover notes and blank but stamped MOTs. Fat lot of use they would be now.
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Currently enjoying products from Ford, Mazda and Yamaha
Ste wrote: Avatars are fine, it's signatures that need turning off.

[Sister Sledge]

[grr666]

*keeping very very quiet about mods to my Spacker*
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Currently enjoying products from Ford, Mazda and Yamaha
Ste wrote: Avatars are fine, it's signatures that need turning off.

[chickenstrip]

I don't mind seeing the odd abomination and expression of lack of taste. It's when you get a whole trend of it that it does my nut!
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Chickenystripgeezer's Biking Life (Latest update 19/10/18) Belgium, France, Italy, Austria tour 2016 Picos de Europa, Pyrenees and French Alps tour 2017 Scotland Trip 1, now with BONUS FEATURE edit, 5/10/19, on page 2 Scotland Trip 2 Luxembourg, Black Forest, Switzerland, Vosges Trip 2017
THERE'S MILLIONS OF CHICKENSTRIPS OUT THERE!

[Easy-X]

[chickenstrip]

[Easy-X]

Ten steps of a café racer build...

1. Strip fairings and paint remaining body parts horrendous colours
2. Wrap exhaust
3. Fit classic "café racer" seat
4. Dump perfectly working air box for pod filter
5. Spend weeks trying to work out why the engine is rough
6. Re-jet carb
7. Remove original handle bars and mount, drop front forks an inch and fit clip-ons
8. Fit inappropriate tyres
9. Spend weeks trying to work out why the handling has gone to shit
10. Adjust/replace rear shock(s)

...and then you can bang on about how much "character" the bike has. (i.e. it didn't turn out as well as you'd hoped.)
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Husqvarna Vitpilen 401, Yamaha XSR700, Honda Rebel, Yamaha DT175, Suzuki SV650 (loan) Fazer 600, Keeway Superlight 125, 50cc turd scooter

[chickenstrip]

I think the term "cafe racer" has changed its meaning. You could actually drop the "racer" bit and just replace it with "visitor". Then just use the bike to ride sedately from one overpriced High St. coffee chain store to the next
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Chickenystripgeezer's Biking Life (Latest update 19/10/18) Belgium, France, Italy, Austria tour 2016 Picos de Europa, Pyrenees and French Alps tour 2017 Scotland Trip 1, now with BONUS FEATURE edit, 5/10/19, on page 2 Scotland Trip 2 Luxembourg, Black Forest, Switzerland, Vosges Trip 2017
THERE'S MILLIONS OF CHICKENSTRIPS OUT THERE!

[MarJay]

Some *%$#ing c*&% did a similar thing to an NS400R recently... I could have cried. Matt black, fairing stripped off. Worst of all they obviously hated the 'look' of the exhaust, so removed the spannies and put on tiny little MZ looking exhausts that stopped right under the footpeg... Probably makes about 10bhp now.

Sad sad times.
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British beauty: Triumph Street Triple R; Loony stroker: KR1S; Track fun: GSXR750 L1; Commuter Missile: GSX-S1000F
Remember kids, bikes aren't like lego. You can't easily take a part from one bike and then fit it to another.

[chickenstrip]

[MarJay]

[redeem ouzzer]

I take massive affront to anyone calling my YR5 a cafe racer, because it isn't. It's a racebike with lights. However because it's a bit classic looking and has a seat hump and clipons people think it's in the same vein as these CB250's and other 4t shite. Boils my piss.
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Be a REAL MAN!

[chickenstrip]

On eBay, one less abomination (for now):

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/273859550017?ul_noapp=true&autorefresh=true