Man accused of shoplifting has ten inch penis

[Ste]

Bringing you the important news because fuck Brexit.

A MAN was accused of shoplifting after staff saw a suspicious bulge in his jeans — but it turned out to be his 10in todger.

Window fitter Steve Whitehurst, 47, showed security his member after a female manager raised the alarm.

He had been buying £400-worth of stuff at Scotts Mens­wear, with girlfriend Mandy Shenton, 46, and her 18-month-old grandson.

But things came to a head at the till when the store manager asked about his bulge.

Steve, who claims he often has to roll up his manhood, said: “I had very tight jeans on that day and there was a bulge, yes, but that’s not illegal. I can’t help the way I’m made.

“The manager started arguing with me. She wouldn’t let it go. I just kept telling her that it was my penis.

“Eventually I dropped my trousers in front of everyone and just stood there in my boxer shorts and said, ‘See, I’ve got nothing to hide’.

“But that didn’t satisfy her. She kept saying, ‘What’s that bulge?’”

He said he then went to a cubicle with a male security guard at his local store in Stoke-on-Trent.

Steve recalled: “I dropped my boxers. He shook his head and ran out and spoke with the manager. I heard her say, ‘Please tell me he’s got something down there,’ and the guy said, ‘No’.”

https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/10006451/man-shoplifting-bulge-big-penis/

[Diggs]

That's the 3rd time this year. I'll have to start taping it to my inner thigh again.
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Now - Speed Triple, old ratty GS550, GSXR750M
Gone (in order of ownership) - Raleigh Runabout, AP50, KH125, GP125, KH250, CBX550, Z400, CB750FII, 250LC, GS550, ZXR750H1, Guzzi Targa, GSX750F, KH250 x2, Bimota SB6R and counting...

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[Polarbear]

It's totally unfair that I haven't got a 10" todger.

I call sizeist.

As an aside, did you know Manchester Untied were going to ban fans for racist chanting because they sang Romelu Lukaku had a big balls (or a willie or something).

I'd be dead chuffed if 70000 people stated singing that about me.
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Triumph Trophy Launch Edition

[Nobby the Bastard]

I can confirm that having a 10 inch penis is no joke. Imagine what it's like for me with my 13 inch one.
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trevor saxe-coburg-gotha:"Remember this simple rule - scooters are for men who like to feel the breeze on their huge, flapping cunt lips."
Sprint ST 1050

[Diggs]

Actually I have 12", but I don't use it as a rule....


I'll get my coat.
____________________
Now - Speed Triple, old ratty GS550, GSXR750M
Gone (in order of ownership) - Raleigh Runabout, AP50, KH125, GP125, KH250, CBX550, Z400, CB750FII, 250LC, GS550, ZXR750H1, Guzzi Targa, GSX750F, KH250 x2, Bimota SB6R and counting...

[Polarbear]

[Diggs]

[Diggs]

[Im-a-Ridah]

He should sue them for damages. If you did that to a woman we would never hear the end of it!

[Nobby the Bastard]

[Easy-X]

[Ste]

I hear Thailand is the place to go for people who like that type of thing.

[Polarbear]

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[Skudd]

When I used to be in loss prevention I had numerous ladies over the years show me their wares, some on purpose, some by accident, some in desperation. Had an old Tinker woman strip off and take a dump in the paper bin............ not nice at any level.
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Famous last words of Humpty Dumpty. " Stop pushing me "
Petty Anarchists look at "1984".............. The Visionary looks at "Animal Farm".

[mentalboy]

[Diggs]

[Raffles]

[Im-a-Ridah]