F*cking Chav scum

[JakeyR]

I dont know if many of you read that weekly rag.

But there was an article a month or so back saying that kids are playing "chicken" with bikes, and that a fair few people have been injured.

Well this evening, i was riding down quite a posh road so was suprised to see the local wankers sat on a wall glugging down the white lightning. As i got within say 30meters of 'em, one of the little fuckers jumped out at me and did some goon like dance in front of me, thinking he was the big hard case, so i dropped a gear and headed straight for the little bastard, not aiming to hit him, was thinking he'd have the sense to jump out the way which he did. Then i pulled over and shouted all sorts of abuse at the little turd (cant remember exactly what i said but it was something along the lines of "fuck shit wank cock sucker get the fuck here or i'm going to tear you a new arsehole) and the scrote decided to runaway like a little girl, in front of all his mates, they then proceeded to laugh at him whilst being slightly scared of being attacked by a 6ft 5 brick shithouse who was in the mood for killing.

So yeah, i'm pretty angry, and if i see the little wanker again it'll be hard to stop myself from kicking the shit out of him.

Rant over, and watch out


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Banned till April 2011.

[MaybeGuy]

watch grease lightning, the car race bit, with the greasy dudes car wheels...
an idea for a bike???
makes it harder to miss and hopefully you'll make the little fucker drive nothing but a wheelchair for the rest of his life...
restricted to 8mph!! much safer.
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Blue_SV650S wrote: it was a sh1te wheelie, but it proves that he can get it up in 3rd and can do angles. In summery, mattsprattuk is a gobby little sh1tebag, dopehead tw4t, but sadly for all of us, he probably isn't THAT full of sh1te!!
Kickstart wrote: Hi I tend to agree with Matt. All the best Keith

[Jack_Cheese]

good work was this in southport?
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[JakeyR]

[Jack_Cheese]

where abouts is this meet? ive heard of it but have no idea where it is!
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[Shay HTFC]

Funland?

Not really got that hairy biker feel to it does it!

[Noxious89123]

Exactly what i'd do! Stupid chavs...

Pretty funny that his mates laughed at him

[.....]

Calm down dear - It's only a Chav.

https://www.cherwell.org/files/winner.jpg

[Nicky-Jano]

I had this happen to me the other night funnily enough.
I was less brave and swerved out of the way and ended up on the pavement .
I've also had a little chav on a push bike ride in front of me forcing me to either swerve into on coming traffic or on the pavement.
Yea I ended up in the on coming traffic lane but luckily there was no traffic.
I hate them I really do.
I'm not a spiteful or vindictive person, but I wish nothing but bad stuff on chavs.
Their foul mouthed, hateful and have no regard for anyone or anything but themselves.

[kiers]

*hides fred perry shirt* yeah, fuckin chavs.
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ooh i can't wait for the next instalment of superluke and his tales of skullduggery.' - lurker 27 sep 2008

[Dalemac]

in these situations, i usually slow down abot, drop a couple of gears but keep the clutch in, give the bike some revs to try and scare him off, but if that fails to work, pop out the clutch, accelerate hard and flick onto main beam.

If they are stupid enough to stand in front of me they deserve to get hit.

When i have learned to wheelie, might try and take one of them out with a nice front tyre to the head!!
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YBR125 -> GPZ500S -> SL1000

[Dragonfly]

So its not just the little wank stains round here that do that. I have encountered this many of time to the point its actually made me scared of going to my parents who are on the rough side of town.

I have had them run out on a dual carriageway while i was doing 60mph and i tell you i crapped it! I am only a lil girl but have a bad temper and couldnt stop on the carrigeway and turn obviosly so i let that one go.

I have felt like grabbing one of their hoodies and dragging them on their arses while i am riding away but i dont know if that will work its only a fantasy at the min. They usually wait tili am at level with them and run to the side of me causeing me to swerve which is more dangerous than their silly dance routines of stupid people.

I am not gutcy enough to wreak my bike and myself by bulletting towatrds them caseu they want to cause an accident here, they threw caustic soda over a kid ffs! and burned her legs of and leave bottles of it around and watch so other kids can do the same. Watch out i can see them hitting a biker with it also.They have done bottles and big rocks, my old helmet was chipped from the wankers and i dont even know them.

Sometimes i wish i had some sort of spy bike like James Bonds suit case or the watches he wears just so i can blast the little wankers.

I fucking hate them, i want revenge and i want someone to tape their revenge so i can sit and foam at the mouth with blood shot eyes in complete euphory and pride.

I say we have a rally and play like a game,when we spot a chav we simpley aim towards them and kill, be a nice stratagy game for the ps2 i think.
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All the breast.
Muzza on Binge:
He's too busy beating the everloving shit out of Lizzie to notice this thread has taken a turn down Drama Avenue and stopped off at the popcorn shop.

[Finglonga]

[Catalyst]

haha how i hate chavs!

I'll admit i am mates with some, their not friends but i don't dislike nor like them. But i live on a housing estate and theres 1 road out of the whole estate which is just council houses. The little scrouts used to lob stuff at me and my friend when i was younger on a field by my house, in the end we got fed up so one day i picked up a huge branch/log type thing and smacked one of them right round the head.

They all ran away and left him there crying Since then they havn't done much, mainly because in the last 2 years i've grown about 1ft and got a bigger build now. They jump out on me sometimes (they don't actually know it's me though) so i just carry on going, if i see them first i swerve to the curb and they run away.

Lets all go on a chav killing spree and ride into the hills with chavs chained to the bike getting dragged down the road...........sorry was i dreaming just there?

Jack
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SlimRick - I can cook really well - but it's a useless skill, as I'm not a woman and it's their fucking job!

[ColdInsomnia]

Chavs are more of a threat to this country than terrorists are / ever will be.
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John Lennon

[pwntifex]

[Dragonfly]

I am now having quality visions of a chav who has had his legs crushed by a bike and broke his two legs screaming like a bitch at the side of the road and calling for his mummy

And i bet his idiot mates would still laugh!
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All the breast.
Muzza on Binge:
He's too busy beating the everloving shit out of Lizzie to notice this thread has taken a turn down Drama Avenue and stopped off at the popcorn shop.

[Willenium]

[Dragonfly]

[nynfortoo]

I still wear hoodies, for when I'm off my bike and don't want to risk getting wet. I find as long as I don't wear the hood up with a 45°-angled-cap underneath, nor have my hand thoroughly wedged down my pants, grasping my balls, people think nothing of me.

[faddius]

get some of the kevlar knuckled gloves, swerve to go past them at the last second and give them a good smack in the face.

Sure it jars your shoulder a bit, but imagine what state their face is in after

Kids in my area have stopped since that happened.

[Jack_Cheese]

I think stopping about 3 inches infront of them and then popping w nice wheelie into their crotch would be good. That'd teach 'em a lesson!

I however have no control over myself in this situation. I do what every moral, decent human being would do and wind the throttle on as far as it will go It's bizzare, i don't even have to think about it. it just happens!

Jack
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[Dragonfly]

[gs5pete]

Interesting thread.. looks like it's getting more common.

I had this happen on my (pedal) bike, doing about 25mph. On a motorbike I'd have just ridden straight at them but on a skinny road bike, they pose more of a danger to me so I wasn't too happy.

the cretins thought it was hilarious until I turned and came back. After denying it outright to begin with (usual "wot ya talking 'bout" etc), they said they were going to get their dad's on me.

They scuttled to one of the kids home's with me in persuit. I knocked on the door, rung bell etc and despite them clearly being someone in (lights on, cars there, etc) there was reply. Someone finally answered but they basically told me just to get lost... their little angels would never do anything like that and I must need my eyes testing, or perhaps I'm a paedo (edit-> okay so he didn't actually say that explicitly, I exaggerate a little).

SO, in addition to all comments above can we castrate their fathers too please?
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past bikes: KX125, CG125 (first road bike, used to pass test on), GS500 (first proper bike).

[Jack_Cheese]

That's even worse! The absolute mind-fucked numbnuts parents who refuse to believe their little darlings would do anything antisocial. Fucking morons need deporting and abandoning on a fucking big rock!
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