House sitting - what could possibly go wrong? lol

[Kaben]

A girl from my office has just told an amazing story...

Her best friend is currently house-sitting for some friends of her
parents. Basically, she just gets to live in an amazing house, eat all
their food, watch their Sky HD and generally live the high life. The
catch... she just has to look after their dog. Anyway, she comes home
from work on Tuesday evening and the dog usually comes running to the
door, but not today. Bit odd...? That's because the dog is dead. Yes,
it's lying stone dead in the kitchen. Oh f**k.

Now, she has no idea how old this dog was - it didn't seem too lively in
the first place. However, she naturally starts panicking that she's fed
it the wrong food or perhaps too much food (in a similar way that plants
die when you over-water them). So, she decides to ring up the vet and
ask what to do - hopefully they'll tell her that the dog had some
terminal disease and this was expected. The vet advises her to bring it
in - they can have a look at it and hold the body until the owners get
back so they can say their goodbyes etc. She decides not to ruin their
holiday by calling them - best to just tell them when they get back.

Now the vet is not local but it is near a tube station - so to save
money she decides to take this dead dog on the tube. How do you carry a
dead dog on the underground? Well, apparently you stick it in a bin
liner and then put that in a wheelie suitcase - easy.

So, she successfully transports this dead dog on the tube with nobody
noticing (luckily it doesn't smell yet) and gets off at her stop. Sadly,
this is a rubbish tube stations with a broken escalator so now picture
her lugging this suitcase up the steps. Somebody spots this girl
struggling and naturally offers their assistance....

Nice man: "Can I give you hand with that?"
Dog Girl: "No thanks, I'm ok"
Nice man: "Are you sure - that looks really heavy?"
Dog Girl: "Yeah, it's just got all my uni books and laptop in it!" (not
the corpse of my parent's friend's dead dog).
Nice man: "Oh come on, I'll just take it up the stairs for you".

Dog girl gives in and the man carries the suitcase to the ticket
barriers for her. As the London Underground barriers are too narrow for
suitcases with deceased pets in, she has to go to that big gate at the
end and ask the man to open it up. She turns to the Nice Man who's
carrying her suitcase, but sadly he is not a Nice Man. He's a Stealing
Man.

That's right, he's legged it through another ticket barrier and he just
about spots him legging it up the stairs outside. He thinks that he's
got away with her uni books and laptop, yet little does he know that
when he gets back to his Crack Den he's going to open up this case to
reveal a dead dog wrapped in a bin liner.

Now that's pretty funny on its own. However, on Sunday this girl is
going to have to explain this to the owners...

Dog Girl: "Now, I'm afraid I have some bad news. The dog died while you
were away"
Owners: "Oh no! How terrible! I'm going to miss Rover [generic dog name]
so much..."
Dog Girl: "Yeah, I'm afraid that's not really the bad news...."
Owners: "Oh....?"
Dog Girl: "Yes, I'm afraid I stuffed Rover into a suitcase, took it on
the tube and then the body of your dead dog was stolen when I let some
bloke carry it up the escalator. Sorry."


Genius.
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[colin1]

!amazing!
i have no karma to give but thats pretty good.
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[Paivi]

[Mr Hammers]

Was she house sitting for Ken Dodd's Dad..?

There's a cat version of the same story on Snopes btw, but still an entertaining read
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[Kaben]