Online dating, it's the future!

[Shaun]

I recently decided to have a go at online dating, there's somebody out there for everybody and I decided that my someone should probably at least know how to use the internet and e-mail, so I posted the following ad.

I'm a desperate insecure wuss

I'm massively insecure and hell bent on sabotaging my life. I'm looking for a 6 month self destructive relationship which might start off well but ultimately will culminate in regular arguments destroying my confidence, self worth and desire to continue living.

I'm 5'10 and I have a 30 inch waist but don't be fooled, I'm hideous and your friends will wonder what the hell you were thinking. Speaking of your friends, I will sleep with them, just to spice things up a bit when the arguments have gone quiet.

I'm unemployed and don't intend on getting a job in the near future, I aspire to embrace an alcohol problem but I don't do drugs, I do have some sort of standards.

I'm looking for a hot girl who knows how to look after me, preferably one with maternal instincts since essentially, I do want you to replace my mother.

e-mail me.

Shaun

It was a long one day wait but finally, the girl of my dreams has come forward and sent me an e-mail!

[Howling TerrorOutOfOffice]

Run Boy Run

Pat
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[Shaun]

She must've accidentally gave me the wrong e-mail address, now I'll never find her.

[The Original Muzza]

[igiyf]

[Fisty]

Sounds like your meeting my ex.
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[Tonka]

Hey! I really think you may be onto something. You're certainly getting close to someone with a similar sense of humour - shame she's given you the wrong address, mind

Loads of potential new comedy material!!
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'The core of a man's spirit comes from new experiences'
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[LankyPaddy]

She sounds like a keeper!

Should've run with this famous ad:

https://paddy.woollyfoot.org/BCF/datingad.jpg
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[Clanger]

Ahhh, I see what you're doing...you're trying out new material on us...I almost laughed. Try a bit harder Shaun and you might raise a titter from me yet...
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[Shaun]

Oh piss off.

It's not new material, it's not suitable for the stage at all, it was mere boredom striking. I always thought of you as someone with a certain degree of intelligence clanger, maybe I was mistaken.

[Dragonfly]

Thats just someone playing you at your own game. Funny though.
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Muzza on Binge:
He's too busy beating the everloving shit out of Lizzie to notice this thread has taken a turn down Drama Avenue and stopped off at the popcorn shop.

[Shaun]

[Clanger]

[damz]

iv'e seen two sides to internet matchmaking.

guy at my work, old, fat, bald and umm well unnatractive who always uses online dating to meet woman. he often moans that the woman are either just not interested ( its understandable) or are not who they say you are. bassically it wont improve the type of girls you will find or even the ammount you will find, if your just wanting a kinky sex affair there are better ways, porno chat rooms are gd for that.... >_>

on the flipside a friend from college often gets random girls messaging him on myspace and there actually real and pretty hot. theres very little effort on his end and it seems to work well for him as one of these flings has become a proper relationship.

personally i wouldnt use it, i find alcohol, a good wingman as well as friends of friends are more effective and not giving a shit if you come off as a weirdo/tit/drunk/mongo as you will never see that girl ever again.

if you watch malcolm in the middle you'l also know its a good way to get free transport
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[sickpup]

[Shaun]

[Steve H]

[MinhDinh]

[AJI]

If she is taking the mick with her reply and isn't a genuine mental then she might actually be worth meeting. At least you could tick off the "sense of humour" box.
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You're gonna go far, kid

[The Original Muzza]

[Luke_Retrofly]

I only skimmed read her reply

[UnknownStuntm...]

I only skimmed the ad...

[Tonka]

Anyone else think that it's got to be Shaun in that Magners Pear Cider Ad?
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'The core of a man's spirit comes from new experiences'
Suzuki SV650S (Clean); Yamaha XT250 Serow (Dirty)

[Clanger]

Oh shucks...now I must pay attention to adverts and see what Tonka is talking about....
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[Shaun]

This advert I believe

There's been some developments.

I received another response!