Proof that my mum thinks I'm a c*nt

[The Original Muzza]

And not in the typical teenage angsty "no-one understands me" way.
She GENUINELY thinks I'm some sort of prick.

Last night I broke up with my girlfriend of over 3 years because I just can't enjoy her company anymore. My mum has always liked this one, as she's sensible, caring etc. Just what men look for in a woman .
Anyways, I woke up this morning as I had to phone the vet about my rabbit who wouldn't eat or drink yesterday. I had text my mum for a lift to the vets as I don't drive, and had also told her I may need to move back in to hers. So naturally, she came round to interrogate me about splitting with my missus. Any normal mum would say something along the lines of "too bad, just move on" or some pish.
Not my mum.
She asked me the following questions, despite ME breaking up with the missus:
"Is she seeing someone else because you don't have a job?"
and when I said no she asked what I feel to be a necessary and understanding question:
"Did you kick the rabbit or something?"

That's right, my mum, knowing me for 21 long years thinks that I torment and abuse my pets, because no young man would ever break up with a girl for acceptable reasons, it must be because he's a violent, jobless arsehole.

[/anti-maternal rant]

Does anyone else have such understanding parents?
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Current Bikes: Husqvarna Svartpilen 401 (2020)
Former Bikes: Honda MSX125 (2014), BMW Funduro (1996), Honda VT500 (1983), Yamaha FZR250 (1989), Suzuki GZ125 Marauder(2005),:Triumph TT600 (2002) (stolen)
From then on, I and the bicycle feelings deeper.

[nick606]

put a donk on it

[supZ]

the phrase 'theres no smoke without fire' comes to mind
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CBR954RR - Daily toy
CBR600RR - Trackbike

[Kwaks]

[Hazylogic]

She's a mum.

[nowhere.elysium]

Yeah, mums do that sort of thing. They'll fight your corner like you wouldn't believe, if someone else has a pop at you, but they do like ripping into their own spawn...

I'm a little mystified by the 'did you kick the rabbit' question, though: that's pretty screwed up.
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'10 SV650SF, '83 GS650GT (it lives!), Questionable DIY dash project, 3D Printer project, Lasercutter project

[Flip]

[The Shaggy D.A.]

Invite them both over for dinner. Serve rabbit.

3 problems solved in one hit.
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Chances are quite high you are not in my Monkeysphere, and I don't care about you. Don't take it personally.
Currently : Royal Enfield 350 Meteor
Previously : CB100N > CB250RS > XJ900F > GT550 > GPZ750R/1000RX > AJS M16 > R100RT > Bullet 500 > CB500 > LS650P > Bullet Electra X & YBR125 > Bullet 350 "Superstar" & YBR125 Custom > Royal Enfield Classic 500 Despatch Limited Edition (28 of 200) & CB Two-Fifty Nighthawk > ER5

[Hex]

[ZRX61]

So, at age 21.. why don't you drive or have a job?

[Tonka]

[Moonie]

You think that's bad, I went over to my parents house not long ago, and said "Hi Mum, how are you doing?" to which she replied "Your dad's moving out, mow the lawn."
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Don't practice it until you get it right, practice it until you don't get it wrong.
Presenting the one and only Chinkmobile

[Cptn. Awesome]

I once got asked if i was on drugs, while we were in KFC.

Basically I and my friend had gone through to Newcastle to visit another mate at uni. A night out round Newcastle, then sleeping on the floor with my head next to the radiator lead to my head feeling like a dried prune.

So the next morning prune-head and all my mate and I decided to drive home and on the way home we deemed it a good idea to go for a sobering walk around the MetroCentre. After that we went home and thought about going for a walk round Hampsterley Forest.

By this time I'm really tired but of course you can't turn down KFC. So with my mam and dad I went and I had trouble remembering anything she was sayin....this naturally lead her to think I was on drugs.



All I can say is this is generally what mams are like. Its a hard truth that we are all druggy, rabbit-kicking idiots.



BTW I have not and doubt I ever will do drugs. I'm a good boy.
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Rides - '60 Plate Ford Fiesta Zetec 1.25, '03 Plate Kawasaki ZX6R B1H and an '87 VFR400 NC24

Naughty Fawbish: "An eagle is but an eagle until the suns flare blinds his prey." - Fawbish, 2010.

[J0Al1]

I'm sure Mum realised that a good woman is hard to come by, as is a good bloke (it seems).

But, it doesn't matter what she thinks if your not interested.

[swanny]

mums dads its all the same...

my dad gives me constant grief. you cant do that etc..

and the constant " why have you got no money "

(26 2 cars a bike, 3 dogs, own home).

i think a lot of parents dont realise how much hassle theyre is setting up nowadays..
i remember my mum telling me her rent was one weeks wages.. mines 550 a month.. which is about 40% of my monthly income...
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M SWANNY.. see a sig !

[Visitor Q]

Haha, for the first time in 6 months dad slipped up and admitted he was proud of me for doing the job/hours I am doing.

[When mentioning a skint mate who keeps wanting me to go play snooker with him, so I end up paying more] 'Fuck no, you work damn hard for your money... oh... '

So that is fun. Same with the degree, first thing he said was why didn't I get a first. He may be proud, but manliness requires NEVER showing it.

Anyhew, re: 'perfect' girlfriends. I've had one, she came to visit this weekend funnily enough, and everyone thinks I'm a tool for ending things (well, ending them enough). If someone is boring to be around, whats the point? Great, they're pretty, dutiful and loyal. I can get all those qualities in a st bernard and get a fleshlight for the others.

However, the previous generation is still mired in their 'find a nice spouse asap, settle down, fire out kids, work until you die' mentality. Ours is not quite so keen to sign away their life.
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...

[MarJay]

At least she didn't hand you a bottle of blue pills and the sex haynes manual!
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British beauty: Triumph Street Triple R; Loony stroker: KR1S; Track fun: GSXR750 L1; Commuter Missile: GSX-S1000F; Cheap project: CBR900RR FireBlade
Remember kids, bikes aren't like lego. You can't easily take a part from one bike and then fit it to another.

[map]

[sickpup]

[Tonka]

[Bofh5]

just wait until you tell her your getting a divorce !
i'm thinking of going into hiding for a year or 10 in the hopes she forgets....
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(L)users...Disk space is to good for them.

Bikes: Honda 50 / CB125-TDC / 93 CBR600 F2 (Stolen & Trashed) / 2001 SP-1 (Sold) / 95 CBR600 F3

[Visitor Q]

I'd love to know why you actually need a 'decent reason' for breaking up with someone.

The amount of times I've explained about this one being just frankly dull, and social death to take out, and about as exciting to talk to as a cantaloupe... but thats perfectly alright and I should try to work around that apparently?

What planet are women on.

Seems you're only allowed to dump a girl who cheats on you or is clingy. Someone you actually have nothing in common with... well thats worth working on.

And Tonka, my parents are well aware that I'd have a vasectomy tomorrow if I knew it was reversible. I have no intention to have children any time soon, and as such no trapping by women, and as such no settling down. A rolling stone occasionally crushes a hippy
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...

[nowhere.elysium]

[Tonka]

[nowhere.elysium]

I have to admit, I don't get why so many families use grandkids as a cudgel to mentally beat their own kids into submission: surely it's one's own choice?
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'10 SV650SF, '83 GS650GT (it lives!), Questionable DIY dash project, 3D Printer project, Lasercutter project