Wild rooster

warped one · Banned Joined: 25 Dec 2007 Karma :

There iss a wild cock in my street waking me at 4.30am every morning.

How do I kill it?
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amnesia - Never in the history of usernames has one been more accurate. Warped indeed. You sir are a fecking oddball.

Phoenix · Twisted Firestarter Joined: 01 Aug 2002 Karma :

Spatchcock it.

Frost · World Chat Champion Joined: 26 May 2004 Karma :

Pile of grain and an air rifle?
Let the cat out?
landmine?

SlimRick · World Chat Champion Joined: 29 Sep 2008 Karma :

Pet fox.

Ariel Badger · Super Spammer Joined: 02 Dec 2006 Karma :

No such thing as a wild chicken, it will belong to someone. Stop attention seeking and learn to live with your fellow creatures.
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Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

Carl_steveo · World Chat Champion Joined: 23 Jun 2008 Karma :

Fucking hell warped now the animals are after you, mate I would just go into hiding.
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Current: Honda Nsr 125
Live: Sunderland
Luke "cant be arsed to read your post, but suck my balls anyway."

Minty · World Chat Champion Joined: 23 Dec 2005 Karma :

Warped gets woken by a cock each morning.

That's how I read it.
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My fingers smell of your mum.

Mr.Everready · World Chat Champion Joined: 28 Mar 2003 Karma :

There are a few folk on this forum who'd love to be woken up by a wild cock at 4.30am.
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the undemocratically unelected mod of the Scottish section

Carl_steveo · World Chat Champion Joined: 23 Jun 2008 Karma :

The Original Muzza · World Chat Champion Joined: 09 Jan 2009 Karma :

I feel like there should be QI style buzzers because it's such an obvious joke but...

To get rid of a wild cock you have to set a wild pussy on it.
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Current Bikes: Husqvarna Svartpilen 401 (2020)
Former Bikes: Honda MSX125 (2014), BMW Funduro (1996), Honda VT500 (1983), Yamaha FZR250 (1989), Suzuki GZ125 Marauder(2005),:Triumph TT600 (2002) (stolen)
From then on, I and the bicycle feelings deeper.

Minty · World Chat Champion Joined: 23 Dec 2005 Karma :

He needs to knock on a few doors and enquires as to whether they are the owners of a troublesome cock.

If they are the owners then they need to not get their cock out. Tell them their cock is getting right into your head and causing you sleepless nights.

Maybe the owners could buy the cock a little football. That way if the cock is dribbling all the time it will cause less grief?
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My fingers smell of your mum.

Ste · Not Work Safe Joined: 01 Sep 2002 Karma :

Call the police and let them deal with it. They'll take it away. Thumbs Up

Well, they might take warped away instead but that's just a risk.

V2 · Nearly there... Joined: 06 Feb 2006 Karma :

Open your windows and scream as loud as you can 'PLEASE, NO MORE COCK, I JUST CANT HANDLE IT ANYMORE, PLEASE SOMEONE MAKE THIS COCK STOP, IT WAKES ME UP EVERY NIGHT AND I NEED TO GET SOME REST, YOUR COCK IS TOTALLY RUINING ME' etc.

Laughing

pa_broon74 · World Chat Champion Joined: 28 Mar 2006 Karma :

You want to get that WPC from Aberdeen who was assaulted by a cock, she'll know how to deal with the situation should it turn ugly.

Thumbs Up

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Didn't catch anything.