I need help with revenge.

[Moonie]

since 10AM I have had to listen to the sound of my father and his new girlfriend rutting away upstairs in a very small house.

I cannot get out of the house as my boots and jeans are in their room, after I sleepwalked up to their room last night, took them off and got into bed with them.

I feel slightly ill.

Someone help me with some sort of appropriate action please.
____________________
Don't practice it until you get it right, practice it until you don't get it wrong.
Presenting the one and only Chinkmobile

[JonB]

Get yourself a woman.
____________________
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it?s worth.

[Fisty]

Wait? what?
You got in bed with your dad and his new gf?





And you want revenge?

Your dad should be gettiong revenge on you!
____________________
Quietly and consistently taking the piss.
TL1000R | Hayabusa | ZXR400 | TL1000S | Bandit 400 V
Fatter and faster than Fret

[Moonie]

No, she was asleep on the sofa as I had been, and I was still wearing boxers and a shirt.

Also, 10 seconds of sharing a bed where my dad is sleeping does not equal 6 hours of shagging.

I've got a woman but she's in Dundee and I haven't got any trousers on
____________________
Don't practice it until you get it right, practice it until you don't get it wrong.
Presenting the one and only Chinkmobile

[The Original Muzza]

That's still pretty fucking weird, IMHO.

Cook off all the bacon/sausage etc in the fridge and that will lure them out of the shag pad. Grab jeans, run (with all bacon safely within a bap).
____________________
Current Bikes: Husqvarna Svartpilen 401 (2020)
Former Bikes: Honda MSX125 (2014), BMW Funduro (1996), Honda VT500 (1983), Yamaha FZR250 (1989), Suzuki GZ125 Marauder(2005),:Triumph TT600 (2002) (stolen)
From then on, I and the bicycle feelings deeper.

[Fisty]

[Frost]

Wait till their done and leave the room. Find out if they have been using lube, put sand in it.

[Moonie]

[The Original Muzza]

The facts were these:

You tried it on with his missus, she said no, but you had lots of precum.
You went upstairs for a bit of father-son bonding (a.k.a "tummysticks")
He got YOUR precum on his Johnson.
He slung his still wet with precum todge up said missus.
She is now pregnant, but with YOUR child (due to your sperms abnormally long half-life) because as everyone knows, strange sperm is more likely to get you pregnant (scientific fact, don't you DARE google it).
____________________
Current Bikes: Husqvarna Svartpilen 401 (2020)
Former Bikes: Honda MSX125 (2014), BMW Funduro (1996), Honda VT500 (1983), Yamaha FZR250 (1989), Suzuki GZ125 Marauder(2005),:Triumph TT600 (2002) (stolen)
From then on, I and the bicycle feelings deeper.

[MarJay]

You only have one pair of jeans? Eww...
____________________
British beauty: Triumph Street Triple R; Loony stroker: KR1S; Track fun: GSXR750 L1; Commuter Missile: GSX-S1000F; Cheap project: CBR900RR FireBlade
Remember kids, bikes aren't like lego. You can't easily take a part from one bike and then fit it to another.

[Moonie]

[pa_broon74]

This is a very warpedesque posting.

I worry for you. (I don't really.)


____________________
Didn't catch anything.

[Skudd]

Good on your Dad for shagging his lady for 6 hours.
____________________
Famous last words of Humpty Dumpty. " Stop pushing me "
Petty Anarchists look at "1984".............. The Visionary looks at "Animal Farm".

[N cee thirty]

maybe there just rearanging furniture
____________________
'00 Aprilia RS50 > '92 Honda CG > '99 Yamaha Fazer > '91 Yamaha RXS > '79 Suzuki X5 > 01' Honda Cg > 07' Honda Cg > 82' Kawasaki Z200 > suzuki gsxr 400 gk73a > honda vfr 400 NC30 Mod 2 Passed 09/06/2011

Jewlio Iglesias wrote: I actually did vote BNP once

[hellkat]

[hellkat]

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

The bacon idea is good.

Take your bacon sandwich and go and sit somewhere pleasant and contemplate how best to deal with the situation.

(does your father ever come down to London?)
____________________
Not nearly as interesting in real life.

[Carl_steveo]

Record it and stick it on the internet. I suggest using a ladder at the window, but you have to be butt naked aswell to scare the neighbours.
____________________
Current: Honda Nsr 125
Live: Sunderland
Luke "cant be arsed to read your post, but suck my balls anyway."

[Pete.]

You were sleeping on the sofa with your dad's bird and you had your boots on? Must have been very comfortable for you both!
____________________
a.k.a 'Geri'

132.9mph off and walked away. Gear is good, gear is good, gear is very very good

[deleted111]

This whole thread has made me let out quite a loud 'what the fuck?'

'Fraid I can't help mate, I'd go for buggering off out the house without trousers personally.

Regards,

Steve.

P.S high five to your dad for ragging his bird for that long.

[jdm]

If i'm reading this right, you crashed with your dads missus on sofa, then sleptwalk upstairs, kitted off and jumped into bed with your old man - but you don't want to disturb them to get your togs as it could be awkward????!!!!! Bit late for that worry me thinks!!

Kudos to the old boy being stallion, it's what sundays are for!!
____________________
Good women make me happy, bad one's even happier!
Current Bike = '97 YZF600R Thundercat

[woll]

Personally i'd shake his hand and ask how he lasted so long.
____________________
Current Bike- Suzuki DRZ400 SM K6
Previous bikes - Derbi Senda Xtreme50r, Honda CBR 125, Kawasaki ZZR 250, Yamaha DT125R, Suzuki Bandit 600, Gas gas ec 250, Honda CBR600FW
Damaged spleen, damaged kindey, 2 popped lungs, 2 broken ribs, broken face, broken wrist and 5 back fractures... remember kids walls hurt

[TomCB]

[Ariel Badger]

The way the other half live. I will never understand Green Blobbers.
____________________
Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

[Ariel Badger]

[Skudd]