Age Difference Relationships

[yambabe]

I could do with a different perspective on this, specially from you lot, cos I'm not sure if I'm being a boring old fart.

Anyway basically my stepson who is 23 has recently started seeing a new girlfriend, she is very nice but is not yet 17.

The actual age difference I don't have a problem with, it's only the same as between me and my bloke. She's legal and other than that it's not really my business imo.

What's worrying me is that tonight he's booked them a holiday abroad for next month. I can't help thinking that if she was my daughter I'd not be happy about her going away for a week with a relatively new boyfriend at that age. There doesn't seem to be any reaction positive or negative from her parents which just seems a bit.... odd...to me.

Now I know my stepson and I know she'll probably be OK with him but at the same time he's young and can be an idiot sometimes.

Just wanted your thoughts really. As a parent it just seems a bit wrong to me. Would your parents let you go away with a boyfriend/girlfriend at that age? If you are a parent of teenagers how would you react if your daughter wanted to do this?

I'm not intending to interfere in their relationship. I just feel uncomfortable with them having this holiday but not for a specific reason, more just a "this isn't quite right" feeling. Am I being an old fud?
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I don't think it's weird of you to think they're a bit odd for not being concerned, tbh. My daughter is 17 and I'd be a bit in equal measures if she hooked up with a 23 year old and went off abroad with him so soon.
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[Handsome]

Depends on how ' Wordly Wise ' she is, if she's a donut then I'd have issues with my Daughter going, if she's got her head screwed on and can handle most situations then I wouldn't per say have a problem with it from her angle, if he was the type of bloke that should have been a wank then I'd have an issue with it ( This is me speaking hypothetically of course )...

But, I don't have kids so I'm going on what I think now, if I had kids then I may think different...
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[swampy]

As a parent of a teenaged (13) girl. I can safely say I wouldn't be very happy about her, at 16, having a relationship with a 23 year old lad (however nice) at all, let alone going on holiday with him.

I know its 'legal', but there is something imperceptible about the whole thing that would get my spidy senses tingling.

I think its not do do with age gap per se, rather than the differing levels of emotional maturity. I wouldn't have so much problem if my daughter was 18 and her chap was 25 funnily enough.

Juts my and I fully expect to be called an overbearing, protective old fart
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[Redoko]

Depends I guess, we don't know them like you do. Oh, and we're both 19, so I guess the example doesn't really apply to the age side of your situation.


Me and my girlfriend of around 9 months at the time (booked at 8) went to Tenerife for a week together as a present for each other before we head off to Uni.

From what I could tell my parents were easily fine with it, and hers also.



However, on a separate side note. I doubt she has any form of long term contraception being 16, I could be wrong, but making sure your stepson (being 23 I'm sure it's fine) isn't a fool about it. Last thing he wants is to knock her up.
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[Benson_JV]

If I was a 16 year old girl (and believe me I wish I was...) I'd be fine with it...I wouldn't see a problem with it, as all the other girls do it these days.

If I had a 16 year old daughter and she started dating a 20 something year old I'd lock her in the basement. I'd be very protective of her...not fritzl style mind you.
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[Nope.]

[johnsmith222]

I am 21 year old male and I would have issues with lots of 18 year olds in maturity nevermind a 16 year old.

[pinkyfloyd]

[Rogerborg]

Make sure she's got an open ticket home or enough funds to get on a plane / train at any time. Also, tell him he's not to sell her to Johnny Abroadlander, no matter how much he's offered.
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[DrDonnyBrago]

The thought of even spending any time around 16 year olds makes me cringe; too immature, too young and I don't like talking about homework.

On a slightly more serious note, I would be seriously unimpressed if a 16 year old daughter/sister ran around shagging and going on holiday with a 23 year old guy - it wouldn't happen on my watch.


I'm surprised the girl's dad hasn't strangled him.

[Kwaks]

a lot of responsibility for him to look after her on holiday. hope she sensible or i see problems.

too much drink she doent know when to stop, cue step son ending up in a situation best avoided
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[Wafer_Thin_Ham]

There's a few like this in every school year.

Sometimes they work out, sometimes they don't.

He just needs to be very careful. Personally Most 16/17 year olds are ridiculously immature and I couldn't be with one for longer than 10 minutes.
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[MaybeGuy]

Im 22 and id fuck the shit out of a 16 year old. Omnomnom. Tell him to throw her my way for the rebound
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[D O G]

No chance if it were my daughter. Any 23 y.o. turning up at my gaff as a boyf would recieve a private visit later. He is either going to be trying to exploit her immaturity, or if he's not, he's too much of a mong to be worthy of any daughter of mine.

But it's not your lookout. In fact, if the parents care so little about her that they are letting her go, then his care is probably better.

[LordShaftesbu...]

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[silky666]

[LordShaftesbu...]

Viagra

[_Troy_]

Well i am a 23 year old guy and my girlfriend is 18. Almost the same situation i guess.

She is quite mature, and i am very mature. I'm also quite a nice lad i think - with plenty o' degrees and an interesting job, so i think her parents are absolutely fine with it. I guess it comes down to the individuals, and therefore can't really be answered for you.

Her mum is even going to let her have her old motorcycle gear so she can get on the back of mine
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[angryjonny]

Age/2 + 7 is the formula for determining acceptable non-weird minimum partner age (if you're the elder).

If you're 18 then that makes 18/2+7=16 the minimum non-weird age.
If you're 20 then it's 20/2+7=17
If you're 40 then it's 40/2+7=27

If you're 23 then it's 23/2+7=18.5

So sixteen is weird. Can't argue with the maths people.

[The Artist]

We need pics of all these girls to make a proper judgement.

[_Troy_]

[Rogerborg]