Petrol Station Rant #2 - **With Reply From Mr Morrisons**

[CaNsA]

So yeah... another Anti-Biker petrol station has pissed me off but this time it is Morrisons and after last time was such a massive success I think BCF can come through for me yet again
The tank was dry, using another place was not an option.

Rolled up to the pump, Pay at Pump was offline ffs, grabbed the nozzle, plonked it in my tank and BOOM!

"Would pump 8 please dismount"

There are no signs about "Dismounting before fuel is dispensed" only about removing lids.
So i get off my bike, take off my lid, look at the fat bint, then the pump is switched on.

I make a point of struggling to keep my bike upright while trying to fill the tank.

Walk into the kiosk and ask the bint why I was asked to dismount....

"It is stated in our licence that all motorcyclists must dismount before fuel is dispensed"

I asked her why and her jumped up manager says:-
"It is because the thermite reaction between the nozzle, petrol and petrol tank can cause a fire"

I said, "Thermite? Bloody thermite....? Do you know what thermite is?"

He said "it is a reaction between petrol, the nozzle and the petrol tank"

I paid my monies and walked out laughing my arse off.

Anyways, time for another letter to a supermarket about their "Anti-Biker" stance and such.

Ingah, chop chop lad :d

[mentalboy]

So it would appear that whilst they don't mind their dirt laden fuel (which one presumes it must be to get a thermite reaction, no doubt the plethora of scientists on here will explain much better I could) blowing your face/arm off when it goes up, they draw the line at testicles
____________________
Make mine a Corona.

[R6 Wilson]

Isn't thermite that chemical/metal they burn on Brainiac?
____________________
♥ YZF-R6 '05 ♥
Time is money so I stay late

[Llama-Farmer]

fucking thermite reaction... thats what they use to weld railway lines (or so my science teacher told me when he did one in year 9 chemistry)

I can understand to an extent why you'd have to dismount, but still, if the petrol cap to a car was on the doorsill, I bet they'd let a driver sit in his car seat and refuel.


I'd never use Morrisons petrol anyway, it's dodgy shit and fucked up a load of cars in Leeds.

[DrDonnyBrago]

[Llama-Farmer]

[Knightsy]

If you was using thermite, I think they would have much more serious shit to worry about than getting you to dismount
What a bunch of plonkers, cheers for sharing a rant mate
____________________
09' Versys 650 | 07' FJR1300A

[FantasticMrFo...]

THERMITE! that shit made me LOL!

Still, it would explain why the dozy bint is working in a supermarket petrol station!

If thermite and a petrol station were to come in contact with each other, it would probably leave a crater the size of 10 morrisons supermarkets, petrol stations and warehouses! Every biker in a 10 mile radius would have to dismount! LOL!

Agreed with the supermarket fuels being shit, we had it big time a few years back, I had to change 2000 lambda sensors in a week! not to mention the amount of tanks we had to drain etc. TOTAL stations aint great either, water gets in their tanks, then into ours causing no end of issues.

I stick to the BP 97 for my 125, even if it means I have to walk the 4.5 miles there and back with a jerry can before driving to fill up completely lol!
____________________
Women are the cause of ALL accident's, If it isn't because one has run you off the road, it's because you have spent too long checking her out and driven up the arse of the car in front!
That or she's parked on an island, on a bend, leaving a gap even an anorexic couldn't fit through sideways!

[J.M.]

Even though the Thermite is clearly bogus, I fail to see how dismounting from the bike stops said fake reaction?

If there's a fire in the petrol station, off the bike or on the bike, good luck.
____________________
2004 R1 & 2018 XSR900

[Stonefly]

Y'know, this is what really makes my piss fizz! they employ borderline simians to press a few buttons, but give them no proper training to answer perfectly acceptable questions from bikers (or anyone else). You are more likely to encounter termites on a forecourt that thermite for fucks sake! I suspect that what they really mean is, 'please get off the bike so its not as easy to fuck off quickly without paying'. Next time, pay for your fuel with a tenner that you have previously used to wipe your arse on!
____________________
Current......Kawasaki ZZR1200 C2H and Kawasaki ZZR600 E7
Previous....Yamaha FS1E, Honda SS50, Suzuki AP50, BSA Bantam D14, Honda CD175, Honda CB250N, Kawasaki Z250A3, Yamaha RD250E, Kawasaki Z400, Kawasaki Z500, Kawasaki GPz550, Honda NTV600, Kawasaki GT750, Kawasaki Z1000R, Kawasaki GPX250

[CaNsA]

How does this read?

It's not finished though.

[FantasticMrFo...]

Lol! It's good, but could do with a sprinkle more sarcasm, then garnished with a touch of irony.

Could I also suggest you add the line "Considering your employees work with such volatile substances, could I suggest that part of your training programme be a homework task which is comprised of watching every episode of "brainiac, science abuse"."

Lol!
____________________
Women are the cause of ALL accident's, If it isn't because one has run you off the road, it's because you have spent too long checking her out and driven up the arse of the car in front!
That or she's parked on an island, on a bend, leaving a gap even an anorexic couldn't fit through sideways!

[bikertomm]

I agree with the above, what difference does it make if when you fill up you are on or off the bike! The nozzle goes in the same hole..

Utterly stupid!


____________________
07' Honda Hornet now full powaah! My guide on performing an oil change!

[Skudd]

You also need to ask why their buns don't last as long as ASDA's do.
____________________
Famous last words of Humpty Dumpty. " Stop pushing me "
Petty Anarchists look at "1984".............. The Visionary looks at "Animal Farm".

[CaNsA]

[Ariel Badger]

Why is it that this reaction only happens if you are sitting upon the bike/ why does it not happen whilst fuelling during racing?
____________________
Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

[CaNsA]

Added

[FantasticMrFo...]

Adding that bit about helmet placement was a good touch, I often suffer with the same thing, cant put it on the tank, if I put it on the seat it'll fall off, cant keep it on your head and wont put it on the floor..

I can think of one place for it though, and that's up the CEO's arse!



I do hope the CEO is a woman, as I've just realised the implication of the statement "put your helmet up their arse"
____________________
Women are the cause of ALL accident's, If it isn't because one has run you off the road, it's because you have spent too long checking her out and driven up the arse of the car in front!
That or she's parked on an island, on a bend, leaving a gap even an anorexic couldn't fit through sideways!

[J.M.]

Nit picking here; question 4 looks to be worded improperly. You've done what I always do and thought out the sentence in your head but missed out a word or two whilst typing it.

Maybe also make a comment on how it only happens to "motorcyclist fuel tanks". Why does the training manager believe that it can only happen on a motorbike and not a car? Maybe that's a bit of a null point considering that it can't happen; it could be used to help outline the incompetence of the station however?
____________________
2004 R1 & 2018 XSR900

[CaNsA]

[Rogerborg]

Their explanations are truly Warped.

They want helmets off so that they've got our faces on film. You'd think it'd be for civil recovery, but I honestly believe that it really is for "age verification". By which I mean that every 6 months some joyless, soul-less, utterly worthless cunt drawing a State salary will come round with his little vinegar face and demand to see their evidence that they're not dispensing to under 16s with his own nasty ratty suspicious eyes. And if we have helmets on, he'll scream "How do you know? Ah hah! How do you know?

They want us off the bikes because rat-eye's brother "works" for the HSE and has identified a theoretical risk of us pouring petrol on our crotches then falling off the bike, spilling fuel everywhere and assploding everything in the huge fireball that fills their Safety Nazi wet dreams. It could happen, unless they prevent it with their rules: it could happen!.

Sorry, may have gone off on one there. Yes, my local is a Morrisons.
____________________
Biking is 1/20th as dangerous as horse riding.
GONE: HN125-8, LF-250B, GPz 305, GPZ 500S, Burgman 400 // RIDING: F650GS (800 twin), Royal Enfield Bullet Electra 500 AVL, Ninja 250R because racebike

[Ichy]

fill not full.
____________________
https://www.metacafe.com/watch/1972097/how_to_behave_on_a_forum/

[bikertomm]

Your side broseph.

Number 8. Not *one


____________________
07' Honda Hornet now full powaah! My guide on performing an oil change!

[CaNsA]

Done and Done,

Any more for anymore?

[map]

Ok with the rant and the final draft.

I'd question stating diesel covered forecourt. Probably not a good idea if it was not diesel covered. I was under the impression a diesel spill was an offence. Apparently this is only true on the highway. Garage forecourt spills should just be reported*.

You could say possible diesel spilled on forecourt.

Please keep us posted.





* Right, that works. Done that several times, both for diesel on floor and leaking pump handle. Have been met with shrugs of the shoulders that would put a Frenchman to shame.
____________________
...and the whirlwind is in the thorn trees, it's hard for thee to kick against the pricks...
Gibbs, what did Duckie look like when he was younger?