Product Review: Oxford Paperweight

[6r4h4m]

Picked up this little beauty in J&S, I've had it for three months now.

https://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn185/idiotboy77/130B35D8-81F7-4A30-9009-6FDC4EB11ED1_zpsbl5qrzbm.jpg

Perfect for keeping receipts and whatnot from flying off the desk in a stiff breeze.

What's different about it compared to all the other paperweights in my collection is the 'Scare-Cat' alarm function. Don't worry, no actual alarm will be caused to your cat. When Tiddles jumps onto the desk for the usual games of "Find and Sit On Whichever Paper the Human Needs Right Now", and "Throw All Paper Onto Floor", it will be surprised by an annoying-but-not-too-loud beeping. 'Surprised' might be overstating mog's reaction: typically it will fix you with a look somewhere between pity and disgust, before making a point of curling out the most punishing and pungent cable it can manage in its litter tray. Just to show you the true meaning of 'deterrence'. But the point is, no more feline interference in your bureaucracy, so a big thumbs up for this feature.

To disarm the alarm, you'll need a tool like a paper knife or a specially grown and shaped thumb nail to pick at the cover on the lock. The factory design includes a catch for when you're first getting used to the device, but don't worry it's made to shear off so that the cover becomes smooth as a salesman's tongue and just as much fun to crack as a greased Rubik's cube.

tl;dr The Oxford Screamer is a best in class paperweight. If you want to know how satisfying it is to own one, but you don't have time to go buy one, simply taking £30 out of your wallet and pop it in the toilet bowl next time you need to go.

[grr666]

Great review.
Ordered...
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Currently enjoying products from Ford, Mazda and Yamaha
Ste wrote: Avatars are fine, it's signatures that need turning off.

[Rogerborg]

Could you do one for the Datatool Series 3 Fuel Saver? Apparently if you fit one to your bike, your consumption is likely to drop to zero.
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Biking is 1/20th as dangerous as horse riding.
GONE: HN125-8, LF-250B, GPz 305, GPZ 500S, Burgman 400 // RIDING: F650GS (800 twin), Royal Enfield Bullet Electra 500 AVL, Ninja 250R because racebike