Should I bollock my son?

[Diggs]

A parenting quandary. Today my son found out that another lad at his school had sent his girlfriend a picture of his todger. She was a little upset but more taken aback by all accounts. My son found him on the field, 'introduced' himself, explained why he was cross then proceeded to beat him up.

I got a call from the Head of Year explaining what had happened, and that it may be a good idea if I take my son to Casualty as his knuckles look badly swollen. The school confirmed that the incident was caused by an 'inappropriate' photograph being sent to my lad's girlfriend, and that whilst measures would have to be taken against him for the fight, mitigating circumstances would be taken into account. I expect my lad will be suspended for a week, and have no idea whether anything will happen to the lad who sent the photo.

I fully expected the other lad's parents/plod to come round tonight, as by all accounts the other lad was a bit of a mess, but nobody has arrived so far.

My question therefore - should I be cross and bollock my lad because he beat up another kid whatever the reason, or should I congratulate him and effectively condone his actions?
____________________
Now - Speed Triple, old ratty GS550, GSXR750M
Gone (in order of ownership) - Raleigh Runabout, AP50, KH125, GP125, KH250, CBX550, Z400, CB750FII, 250LC, GS550, ZXR750H1, Guzzi Targa, GSX750F, KH250 x2, Bimota SB6R and counting...

[recman]

How did the todger get sent to your lad's girlfriend's phone?
What was she doing with his contact info?

I was at school before the advent of mobile phones, we had to be very inventive when it came to exposure.

[Jewlio Rides Again LLB]

How old are the kids involved?
____________________
Mpd72: I can categorically say i’m Brighter than that, no matter how I come across on here.
HAHAHA HAHAHA Blew Chilly MyCrowSystems

[Skudd]

Good for sticking up for his G/F. Bad for giving the lad a good hiding. Should have sent it to the Fuzzyboys and the Lad get a proper telling off.

In them olde days a good kicking was ok but times have changed.
____________________
Famous last words of Humpty Dumpty. " Stop pushing me "
Petty Anarchists look at "1984".............. The Visionary looks at "Animal Farm".

[recman]

[M.C]

[GhostRider]

Pretty sure the law view this as distribution of images of underage children if either of these kids are under 16.....might want to run that by this kid and his parents.

GhostRider
____________________
I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.

[Diggs]

Snatch-chat apparently. They are both 15. I suspect the reason why we haven't seen the parents or the plod is because the parents know that if they involve the plod, the question of what made him do it will come out and their lad may face charges and the possibility of two years on the nonce-register...
____________________
Now - Speed Triple, old ratty GS550, GSXR750M
Gone (in order of ownership) - Raleigh Runabout, AP50, KH125, GP125, KH250, CBX550, Z400, CB750FII, 250LC, GS550, ZXR750H1, Guzzi Targa, GSX750F, KH250 x2, Bimota SB6R and counting...

[Dave70]

Under the circumstances, I'd probably have a word with him to explain that ordinarily, that type of response could end up getting him in a whole lot of trouble and it's not really a good idea. I wouldn't be to harsh on him though. Especially if his actions were generally out of character.

Inside though, there would be a part of me thinking.
____________________
There ain't no devil, there's just god when he's drunk.

2012: R125 killed by white van. 2016 R125 killed by 30,000 miles of redline. Current: 2016 Kawasaki ER6f.

[Mawsley]

Did the picture of the penis feature a working model of Rainpal?

[Polarbear]

Agree with Dave70. What was perfectly acceptable a while ago isn't anymore mores the pity.

Saying that though, if I was the girls father I'd shake his hand.
____________________
Triumph Trophy Launch Edition

[stinkwheel]

Did he feel threatened by the todger? How did it make him feel?

In fairness, if my wife was sent a picture of some guys todger, providing it didn't upset her (which I doubt it would), I'd let her deal with it.

So the question he has to answer is what, really, upset him about this todger picture? Is he concerned his GF may be tempted away? In which case, dump her. Does it make him feel inadequate? In which case, well, get over it.

The only reason for an abruptly physical response if if said GF read it as a direct threat of imminent violence. In which case it's probably a case of the police AND a kicking while you're waiting for them to arrive.

Any of the others, I'd suggest a rapid sharing of the image in question across all available social media would have been the correct response.

You can tell him I said so.
____________________
“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.”
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.

[Azoth]

There are good reasons for getting into fights but they're extremely rare. This wasn't one of them.

Culturally, the sort of people who do things like this nowadays are self-appointed morality police, often under the guise of religion, i.e. sharia. It's best to be as culturally distant from them as possible. In the old days, violence begotten by sexual jealousy was considered beneath the dignity of civilised man.

Do you want your son to grow up starting physical altercations with other men who look at his girlfriend or wife a moment too long? You have to set him right and explain why we let laws and systems deal with such problems, rather than interpersonal violence. If you don't do it, for now, teachers may. This will harm his education. In the future, the police, courts and prisons might.

You may want to explain to him, impressing upon him the gravity of the situation, that his barometer of manliness needs calibration. A man needs to be secure enough to handle other men staring at his wife. That's how society works. If he doesn't accept this, he's basically on the other side of the fence, and has distanced himself from the system. In that case, he had better be damned good with his fists, to be the hardest man in the whole damned town, to be able to beat up all those straights and squares, to keep his wife/gf in line with the occasional roughing up, and then to beat up everyone in prison who wants to beat him up, and who doesn't care for one-on-one pugilism but would rather surround and jump on him, kicking in his head until their bad/sad feelings go away. Is that the sort of life he wants, or that you want for him?

As has been noted, punch-ups are tolerated less than they once were. The world has become smaller, and there is less scope for discretion now. The only way through is to be smart. The dinosaurs that use brute force are being phased out.
____________________
Safety in numbers

[c_dug]

Out of interest did your son actually see the picture?

15 year old girls can be notoriously manipulative.
____________________
I am a bellend, I am a man of constant sorrow, I am a gummy bear, I am a rock.

[Ste]

Bollock him for getting caught.

Measures will have to be taken against your son for the fight and mitigating circumstances will be taken into account is all very interesting but your son isn't the one who created and distributed kiddy porn s o I don't think he's got much to worry about.

Teach your son some basic photoshop skillz.

[.....]

Don't Snapchat messages disappear after a set time? If your son has given someone a good pasting don't be surprised if the picture sender denies ever sending a picture and claims he was given a kicking for no reason. With no snapchat message anymore and one injured person your son could be in hot water especially as the sender will not have told his parents the true reason for the fight.

More likely, if the sender and his folks have any sense, you'll hear no more.

[MarJay]

Violence is not the answer I'm afraid. He could have got himself into a lot of trouble just for some juvenile little git sending a picture of his micropenis.

As people have mentioned, it might be considered under the same laws as child pron, so he'd have been better to report it. I do feel some respect for him for what he did, but it was totally the wrong way to do it. Not only that, if he gave the other kid a hiding enough to make his knuckles swell, then I'd say he took it too far. When I was a kid disagreements were usually solved with a thrown punch which usually ended up with both parties on the deck and lots of pushing, I don't recall ever seeing anyone having had to go to casualty for swollen knuckles.

So, short answer yes he should get a bollocking, and he should realise that were this the 'real world' outside school, he'd probably be looking at serious charges and perhaps even a custodial sentence. Provocation means little by way of mitigation these days.
____________________
British beauty: Triumph Street Triple R; Loony stroker: KR1S; Track fun: GSXR750 L1; Commuter Missile: GSX-S1000F; Cheap project: CBR900RR FireBlade
Remember kids, bikes aren't like lego. You can't easily take a part from one bike and then fit it to another.

[Kris]

Your boy gets a from me.

Weird world we live in today when we are effectively 'at war' and no-one even notices or cares, yet boys aren't allowed to have fisticuffs in a field.

Sounds like the issue is now resolved and the scrote may think twice next time. I'd just be thankful your boy has some spirit in him.
____________________
NSR125RR - ZXR750H1 - ZX9R E1 - GSF600S - GSF600SK3 - VFR400-NC30 - SV1000N - ST1100-R - CBR900RR-R - GSF1200SK5 - GSF600SK1 - VFR1200FA - GSXR1000K2 - ZZR1400 D8F
www.prisonplanet.com

[P.addy]

The main question is, does she still have that guy in her contacts. She'll be back for more, he will provide. This is how terrible relationships are born.

[Rogerborg]

[Loui5D]

Thrust cold beer into hands of the lad imo.

Then again don't listen to me as i'm one of the young 'uns.

[Lord Percy]

Sounds a bit of an OTT response to me.

Would you beat someone up, to the point of your knuckles needing medical attention, because they sent your mrs a rude picture?

Even though your son wasn't the one who started it, and he was right to give a firm warning to that lad, it might not be right to send open congratulations his way because that's telling him he can and ought to get heavy any time something makes him a little bit angry. Not a good thing in the adult world.

All the known fighty lads from my high school are now complete wasters. One went to prison for serious assault in a kebab shop, and I remember once bumping into another lad in the pub, who was proud of the curfew device wrapped round his ankle because he'd found a way to take it off.

So, I'd take care with any endorsements you send out.

[Diggs]

Thanks for the viewpoints. The Mrs and myself have given it a lot of thought and this is where we are with it, rightly or wrongly:

1. He was right to get the other lad to stop.

2. He was wrong to hit him repeatedly - a verbal warning and a slap if the lad laughed back at him should have been enough.

3. We suspect the beating had more to do with male pride than offence caused to his girlfriend, given the way 15 year old lads tick. Note (to whomever may read this...) that this statement in no way implies that his girlfriend didn't feel offended, nor that his actions were unjustified given the circumstances, of which I am not fully aware...

4. The other lad's parents have probably been told the reason for the altercation by the school, and are currently in hiding due to mortal embarrassment.

5. The other lad will be feeling worse as not only did he get hit, he also has to face the fact that the whole school/village will know why. I don't know if sending pictures of ones todger is seen as acceptable nowadays by kids, but it shouldn't be and I suspect he won't be getting much babysitting work for a while...

We won't be 'bigging him up' for his actions.
____________________
Now - Speed Triple, old ratty GS550, GSXR750M
Gone (in order of ownership) - Raleigh Runabout, AP50, KH125, GP125, KH250, CBX550, Z400, CB750FII, 250LC, GS550, ZXR750H1, Guzzi Targa, GSX750F, KH250 x2, Bimota SB6R and counting...

[Rogerborg]

[Lord Percy]

Loosely related anecdote.

About 13 years old, at high school there were a few classrooms out on the edge of the playing field in weird annex buildings. Behind these buildings, there started a small trend among a couple of lads in our year who'd go with their girlfriends and basically loiter there and try to kiss them.

My twin brother and a few other mates discovered this and, being the little kiddies we were, thought it funny to torment them because they were doing strange adult things that we weren't interested in yet. Lobbed berries and sticks etc to disturb them.

Did this a few times until one day one of these lads must have dobbed us in for it, the head of year got us into his office and bollocked us all, classed it as some kind of assault, and we had letters sent home saying we had been throwing "missiles" (exact word used).

Me and my brother were good kids, just a bit immature really, so this was a major situation for us, having a letter sent home.

When the day came, we got back from school, walked in the door and dad was stood in the kitchen holding this letter and looking angry as hell. He walked up to us and put a hand to both our throats, like a pair of helpless chickens about to have their necks snapped. Ultra scary, end of the world scenario, lives flashing before eyes.

He then let go, chuckled a bit and told us it was the most absurd thing on earth to be getting a letter sent home over. We weren't in trouble at all, just told to not be such annoying little scrotes, and that was that