Things to do in prison

[Sun Wukong]

What things would you do if you were locked up in prison for a stretch to better yourself.

Things that only require time and dedication.

Books, pencils, paper etc are likely to be difficult to get (or keep), so for the sake of this exercise we need only things inside your body and mind.

Skills, training, body/mind improvements etc.

Copious masturbation is a given, so lets avoid that one

So, I have two to start us off.

- Lucid dreaming:
This is my "If I end up in prison, I will master this" thing.
It works best with some form of paper to note down what happened so you improve the link between waking conscious and dream conscious, but in theory you could just say it out aloud. Discuss it with your cellmate if you could get them on board to try it.

- Foreskin restoration:
Just time and commitment... and hands. I have another thread on this, but I am surprised it is not better known about. The benefits for sensitivity are really impressive

What else?
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Top cat
"Hard times lead to hard people. Hard people lead to good times. Good times lead to weak people. Weak people lead to hard times." Smegballs
"Oh and STE balloons would be one of the nicer things we would receive at the office, the amount of dog turd in jiffy bags is not funny." Jsmith86

[Rogerborg]

De jure: convert to Judaism for the better food.

De facto: convert to islam for the better safety.
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Biking is 1/20th as dangerous as horse riding.
GONE: HN125-8, LF-250B, GPz 305, GPZ 500S, Burgman 400 // RIDING: F650GS (800 twin), Royal Enfield Bullet Electra 500 AVL, Ninja 250R because racebike

[Sun Wukong]

[fatjames]

The usual pipe dream of less weight and more fitness..

But if I really wanted to change... time to stop creating fantasy barriers.

I once thought 'If I were single.. work out etc' Then it kinda dawned on me that my OH doesn't stop me bettering myself and in fact, her support would be helpful. But I have gained weight since this thought .

Same for OP, surely you can sleep and write down your dreams without having to be in prison? Nightly shawshankings might also make it harder for you?

[iooi]

[M.C]

Play the Xbox all day Oh right better myself, probably read, do whatever BS qualifications/courses they were offering and workout. Number one priority would be trying not to get stabbed and/or bum raped.

[The Shaggy D.A.]

Press ups, sit ups, jumping jacks - any exercise that doesn't need equipment.

Yoga - stretching and flexibility.

Mental arithmetic.

Hand drumming.
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Chances are quite high you are not in my Monkeysphere, and I don't care about you. Don't take it personally.
Currently : Royal Enfield 350 Meteor
Previously : CB100N > CB250RS > XJ900F > GT550 > GPZ750R/1000RX > AJS M16 > R100RT > Bullet 500 > CB500 > LS650P > Bullet Electra X & YBR125 > Bullet 350 "Superstar" & YBR125 Custom > Royal Enfield Classic 500 Despatch Limited Edition (28 of 200) & CB Two-Fifty Nighthawk > ER5

[Saraya]

[M.C]

[thx1138]

prison cell work out routine
bible study
sulk

[Poundshop Dave]

I'd get all the free stuff I could. Language course, plumbing course maybe. Gym, or whatever I could squirrel out of my stay.
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Proud to be from Birmingham

[M.C]

[Polarbear]

I spent the best part of 30 years on a prison that could sink. And before you lot laugh we didn't have half the luxuries prisoners get.

What's that Monty Python sketch....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xe1a1wHxTyo
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Triumph Trophy Launch Edition

[chickenstrip]

Learn a trade. Something that'll be useful on the outside. I hear PhDs in drug dealing are popular. Come to that, with the current reported state of our prisons, it'd be useful on the inside too.
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Chickenystripgeezer's Biking Life (Latest update 19/10/18) Belgium, France, Italy, Austria tour 2016 Picos de Europa, Pyrenees and French Alps tour 2017 Scotland Trip 1, now with BONUS FEATURE edit, 5/10/19, on page 2 Scotland Trip 2 Luxembourg, Black Forest, Switzerland, Vosges Trip 2017
THERE'S MILLIONS OF CHICKENSTRIPS OUT THERE!

[Andy_Pagin]

At my time of life I'd have sod-all to gain by behaving myself, so I'd think up interesting ways to escape. Wouldn't attempt them myself, instead act as a consultancy service to other inmates, for a fee of course.
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They're coming to take me away, ho-ho, hee-hee, ha-haaa, hey-hey,
the men in white coats are coming to take me away.
Yamaha Vity -> YBR125 -> FZS600 Fazer -> FZ1-S Fazer

[skatefreak]

yeah... about that...
Have always been interested in Lucid dreaming...
By chance I started remembering dreams a little more often upon waking up recently so started hand bashing them into my phone the moment I woke up.
What I have discovered is that I actually don't have very pleasant dreams most of the time. They always seem to involve fleeing mortal danger, being assaulted/mortally wounded or escaping natural disasters surrounded by a mishmash of familiar people and strangers, of which neither usually recognise me leaving me somewhat perplexed and further isolated in whatever irrational scenario I'm trying to rationally survive.

The interesting thing is, writing them down I can look back on and identify things that should be massive flags telling me this is a dream. Such as knowing a short cut to swim hundreds of meters across a lake quickly, with ease and knowing the swim back will take a lot longer (no currents or logic behind it...), or some hench fella punting down a river in torrential rain, throwing rocks at me with his wheel chair bound mother on board, or surroundings changing drastically around me and not questioning it in the slightest?
Its recognising these flags, things that could not possible be occurring in reality that should jolt you into realising its a dream but no.. I just seem to accept it 'as is'...

This morning I woke up with an awful feeling that I really just did not want to remember so got up and cracked on with my day... I have a distinct feeling last night was a rather stabby night

[Sun Wukong]

[stinkwheel]

Lots of tai chi.
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“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.”
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.

[MahatmaAndhi]

Basically, re-enact the first 30 minutes of Old Boy.
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2008 Aprilia Sportcity 250

[Nobby the Bastard]

Get repeatedly arseraped by big tony and his best mate, bubba?
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trevor saxe-coburg-gotha:"Remember this simple rule - scooters are for men who like to feel the breeze on their huge, flapping cunt lips."
Sprint ST 1050

[Nutz]

Get a new wife. Wank. Usual stuff

[RhynoCZ]

I'd Vinnie Jones the whole situation. Meaning, I'd play football with other inmates against the wardens.
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'87 Honda XBR 500, '96 Kawasaki ZX7R P1, '90 Honda CB-1, '88 Kawasaki GPz550, MZ 150 ETZ
'95 Mercedes-Benz w202 C200 CGI, '98 Mercedes-Benz w210 E200 Kompressor

[Howling Terror]

I get to bully again.

Play the piano.
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Diabolical homemade music Bandcamp and Soundcloud
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[dydey90]

[M.C]