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How many cats do I have?

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hellkat
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PostPosted: 14:41 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: How many cats do I have? Reply with quote

I would like to be more specific about how many cats I have.

Knowing, of course, that nobody ever really owns a cat, the components of my equation go like this:

Lawrence: One cat, male, four legs, ours.
Dennis: One cat, female, three legs, ours.
Longshanks: One cat, belongs to them next-door, but spends 90% of his time with us, male, four legs.

So technically I own one and three quarters of cats, based on the number of legs. But Nextdoors' cat is here SO DAMN OFTEN that I might as well count him, and we have even given him a name (Longshanks) which is not the one his parents gave him.

So we have three cats, with 11 legs between them, but only 50% ownership of one of them.

Can someone provide a mathematical equation to show this, and to give me an idea of the correct number of cats we have.

Can I just say 2 and a quarter cats (i.e., 1.75 + 0.5 of other cat)
Or should I be more precise?

Thanking you in advance.
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thx1138
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PostPosted: 15:15 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Re: How many cats do I have? Reply with quote

hellkat wrote:
I
Or should I be more precise?




Well, a cat must have three different names, so in principal I am uncertain.
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 15:24 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lawrence
Lorenzo
Lazza
Lal-Bo
Fatty Lal (he is not at all fat)

Dennis Hopper
Den-Bo
Den-Den (she actually responds to this)
T-Rex Cat

Longshanks
Shanks
George (he's not quite a Kitler but has a moustache that makes him look like Brian Murphy aka George from George and Mildred)
and of course: [whatever his real name is via his parents next door]
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thx1138
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PostPosted: 15:41 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

you don't have any cats

Three cats each have a part share in you,
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pepperami
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PostPosted: 16:26 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hellkat, you are doomed! You're slowly turning into the resident " Mad Cat Lady" Shocked
Next you'll be giving us links to their blog pages so we can keep up with their daily antics Laughing
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 16:42 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mate, I can't even get my act together to do my own blog for more than about two days before I get bored.

Let alone for those three idle bastard cats.

Besides, Dennis only has one paw, she can't type fast enough to blog.
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Wafer_Thin_Ham
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PostPosted: 16:56 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

hellkat wrote:
Mate, I can't even get my act together to do my own blog for more than about two days before I get bored.

Let alone for those three idle bastard cats.

Besides, Dennis only has one paw, she can't type fast enough to blog.


Live facebook stream?
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CaNsA
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PostPosted: 17:40 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lightweight.

Jim - 4 legs - ours
Genie - 4 legs - ours
Fakers - 4 legs - moved in over 4yrs ago - now ours
Oscar - 4 legs - lives next door - spends a lot of time eating in ours.
Teal'c - 4 legs - lives in teh alley - gets fed here twice a day - keeps trying to move in
Small black and white hitler cat - 4 legs - sneaks in when he thinks no-one is looking.
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M.C
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PostPosted: 18:54 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

What I'm taking from this is don't get a cat otherwise you'll end up with more cats.
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chickenstrip
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PostPosted: 19:32 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

M.C wrote:
What I'm taking from this is don't get a cat otherwise you'll end up with more cats.


Oh man, I just took him in till he could get his shit sorted. Felt sorry for him, y'know? Next thing you know, he's invited all his buddies round, they eat me out of house and home, wreck the furniture and sit in MY chair! And none of those no-good bums has got a job Rolling Eyes
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dydey90
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PostPosted: 19:32 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

CaNsA wrote:
Oscar - 4 legs - lives next door - spends a lot of time eating in ours.
Teal'c - 4 legs - lives in teh alley - gets fed here twice a day - keeps trying to move in
Small black and white hitler cat - 4 legs - sneaks in when he thinks no-one is looking.


How do they achieve this? One of our neighbours has just started letting out their young cat and it likes our garden, but it gets battered by my two* every time it comes over the fence. Yet it still comes back three times a day and there's not even food in the garden.

*battered by a toothless 15 year old grumpy tomcat. The gigantic, 2 year old female rag doll (females are meant to be teratorial?) just cowers at it and hides.
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Baffler186
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PostPosted: 21:03 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

We have 1 cat
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Johnnythefox
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PostPosted: 21:09 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

I 'think' I have no cats, there's one I found out is called Lazy lives three doors up but likes to sleep on my bike seat and yes I have taken the car rather than move the cat and there's a ginger one sleeps on the cushions on my decking most mornings.
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Andy_Pagin
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PostPosted: 23:07 - 13 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

One cat with a slower metabolism than a giant redwood, another faster than a velociraptor on speed.
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andyscooter
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PostPosted: 08:00 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

we have no cats but our neighbours likes to sit on the garden wall and annoy the dog

or sits on the front door step to annoy him
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grr666
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PostPosted: 08:13 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Gracie isn't at all tolerant of cats. If she sees one, she loses her shit big time.
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bugeye_bob
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PostPosted: 08:15 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

You own none, they allow you to serve them lol
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Andy_Pagin
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PostPosted: 08:29 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

One of ours disappeared for a week, he'd put on weight when he came back.
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rcbikeracer
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PostPosted: 08:34 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lucy kitten ex farm cat
Molly queen and the runt of the litter
Isambard Tom and ex farm cat
Oscar ginger tom moved in last year
Boro queen and mother of the farm cats
Boris tom farm cat
Bailey farm cat and boro's brother
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bugeye_bob
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PostPosted: 08:35 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Andy_Pagin wrote:
One of ours disappeared for a week, he'd put on weight when he came back.


One of the local cats went missing for 10 months, the owner put up posters and he was spotted, 6 miles away, so off she pops and finds him, she drags him home and keeps him in for a month, he went back,
so she drags him back again and keeps him in, and fits a tracker, turns out he had a 2nd home and that one refused to stop feeding him,
" he wouldnt come back if he wasnt hungry" was her reasoning,

turns out she had history of feeding random cats.
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Saraya
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PostPosted: 09:34 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm not sure it's even a proper cat - but it lives here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kA-vlA7S9E
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 10:11 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

grr666 wrote:
Gracie isn't at all tolerant of cats. If she sees one, she loses her shit big time.

Similarly, Bruno did not allow us to have cats. I had two when he arrived, but he menaced them so much that I suspect one died of fright/fear/starvation (from not being able to come near the house without Bruno going nutso), and the other lived under my bed from the day he arrived, and ended up going back to the lady that gave them to me.

Rolling Eyes
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 10:15 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wafer_Thin_Ham wrote:
Live facebook stream?

They're not allowed on Facebook.
They're encouraged to get out into the real world and meet new friends Laughing
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thx1138
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PostPosted: 10:53 - 14 Aug 2017    Post subject: Reply with quote

When I was a kid we had a psycho German shepherd that protected me a kid, loved a few family members and friends, and wanted to kill the rest of humanity.

Our cat kicked it's arse. Laughing
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