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Revelation... Number 2

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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 20:59 - 03 May 2019    Post subject: Revelation... Number 2 Reply with quote

I had a poo earlier. It was one of those "that was definitely a poo!" poos.

When I got up the bowl was empty! (well not of wee and water but you know what i mean.)

I'm working on the hypothesis that the poo thought it was a skaterboi and rode the half-pipe all the way round the U-bend Very Happy

Any other plausible explanations?
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Kawasaki Jimbo
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PostPosted: 21:00 - 03 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

It was just piss and wind.
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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 21:17 - 03 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Nah, the "earth" definitely moved. Besides I would have noticed an auditory and olfactory cue Smile
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Sister Sledge
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PostPosted: 22:05 - 03 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

*Your bottom is so worn out now that things just fall out at high speed and the momentum throws them round the chicane.

*That or it was long and thin and once the start of it was pushed past the drop, it began hauling the rest with it.

*Perhaps the toilet water was replaced with cooking oil and the poop was lubricated through the hairpin bends?

*Rats ate it. Hungry rats eating fast.

*The poop dropped into the water and then you farted. The fact that your arse was spread over the whole toilet seat meant the fart could only go down-over and it pushed the poop through the bends with it.

*Perhaps your bowels have a perfectly matching s-bend in them which matches the toilets? When the poop fell out it was already the correct shape to fit through the bends and so did.

(Bans coming methinks)
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Riejufixing
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PostPosted: 22:20 - 03 May 2019    Post subject: Re: Revelation... Number 2 Reply with quote

HardlyDavidson wrote:
When I got up the bowl was empty!


You've just said you went to the lavatory, so you'd expect your bowel to be empty.

Sheesh!

Talk about lowering the tone, Old Boy!


Last edited by Riejufixing on 22:56 - 03 May 2019; edited 1 time in total
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Skudd
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PostPosted: 22:54 - 03 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

I had a poo yesterday, it stretched me to the point of pain but I still had to push. It was looking at me from the bowl with an air of superiority. I wiped ........... Nothing, not even a slight hint of. WTF?
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Ste
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PostPosted: 23:06 - 03 May 2019    Post subject: Re: Revelation... Number 2 Reply with quote

HardlyDavidson wrote:
I had a poo earlier. It was one of those "that was definitely a poo!" poos.

When I got up the bowl was empty! (well not of wee and water but you know what i mean.)

I'm working on the hypothesis that the poo thought it was a skaterboi and rode the half-pipe all the way round the U-bend Very Happy

Any other plausible explanations?

YFPOS.
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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 00:46 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sister Sledge wrote:
*Perhaps your bowels have a perfectly matching s-bend in them which matches the toilets? When the poop fell out it was already the correct shape to fit through the bends and so did.

(Bans coming methinks)


LMAO Thumbs Up
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uberkron
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PostPosted: 08:02 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's called a ghost poop or ninja shit.

I'm kinda thrilled when it happens to me.
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Nobby the Bastard
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PostPosted: 09:47 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Nah, a ghost poo is when you have a shit in a field because the portaloo at bbq is broken.

Isn't that right, Ghostrider?
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Pjay
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PostPosted: 10:26 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Re: Revelation... Number 2 Reply with quote

HardlyDavidson wrote:
I had a poo earlier. It was one of those "that was definitely a poo!" poos.

When I got up the bowl was empty! (well not of wee and water but you know what i mean.)

I'm working on the hypothesis that the poo thought it was a skaterboi and rode the half-pipe all the way round the U-bend Very Happy

Any other plausible explanations?


It's called a 'Ghost Poo' if your arse was clean too.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ghost%20poo
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Skudd
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PostPosted: 11:34 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

I had a poop this morning at 6am and it was as it never happened, just had one at 11am and it was Armageddon.
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Pete.
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PostPosted: 11:36 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kawasaki Jimbo wrote:
It was just piss and wind.


Like most of what he posts...
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bhinso
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PostPosted: 11:47 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Revalation 2: ?

I thought Dr Quack was back for a minute...
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Kawasaki Jimbo
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PostPosted: 11:50 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Re: Revelation... Number 2 Reply with quote

HardlyDavidson wrote:
I had a poo earlier. It was one of those "that was definitely a poo!" poos.

Any other plausible explanations?

Maybe it wasn't something coming OUT ...
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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 12:59 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Pete. wrote:
Kawasaki Jimbo wrote:
It was just piss and wind.


Like most of what he posts...


It's been a long time since I've sparred with quality trolls, I shall endeavour to do better in the future!
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 13:20 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

I am unhesitatingly certain I have never had a poo that disappeared.
There has always been a flushing requirement.

Has the panel considered what it is, i.e., what particular foodstuffs or physical events might propel this activity? Because even if only to avoiding having to use flushing water but also toilet paper. Think of the savings!
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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 15:27 - 04 May 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Aye, you never hear the tree huggers banging on about how better bowel movements could save the planet!

I did consider keeping a diary to track food versus poo correlations... but within the cacophony of voices in my head I could just faintly pick out "you sad twat!"
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Old Thread Alert!

The last post was made 4 years, 330 days ago. Instead of replying here, would creating a new thread be more useful?
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