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Tenerife holiday advice needed.

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Hetzer
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PostPosted: 18:47 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Tenerife holiday advice needed. Reply with quote

From anyone who's been and it wasn't a long time ago.

First off, it has to be Tenerife.

So basically, good hotels, shit ones to avoid etc. And is £1500 enough spending money for a fortnight (eating out every night, cafes, drinks, drugs [coke's cheap there, right?] and maybe a couple of excursions [or jet skis] etc).

And when are the off/on peaks, cheapest time this side of xmas.

TIA. Smile

Fuck, forgot to mention night life and banging clubs. I have no idea how big the island is.
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P.
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PostPosted: 19:12 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

1500 is about 3 times too much to enjoy yourself. Laughing
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Hetzer
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PostPosted: 19:28 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Paddy. wrote:
1500 is about 3 times too much to enjoy yourself. Laughing


Including drugs? Mr. Green
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 19:54 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

https://images.app.goo.gl/HDx2KQSkN9uSugZm7
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 19:59 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why aren't my images posting properly these days?
*stamps foot petulantly*
#huff

https://media.tenor.com/images/e6b4a2200afa4df5924625157514fdba/tenor.gif
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Shaft
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PostPosted: 20:00 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Playa de las Americas is where all the action is.

The main drag is wall to wall bars, clubs and restaurants and it also has the best beaches - they import white sand from Africa, whereas everywhere else has volcanic sand, which is black and slightly sticky.

I'm not sure there are many really shitty hotels, they've been doing tourists for a long time now, so they've pretty much got it sussed, I would probably go self catering apartment, then you aren't tied to meal times and you can come and go when you like.

It isn't the cheapest place on the planet (they took the opportunity to hike everything up when they changed to euros) but £750 a week should be enough.

I always used to go over Xmas, but the run up to it should be OK and you can avoid families if you time it right.

Can't comment on drugs, never been offered them there and don't use them if I had, so you'll have to research that elsewhere.
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 20:03 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why did that one work and the other/s didn't?
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Hetzer
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PostPosted: 20:11 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Shaft wrote:
Playa de las Americas is where all the action is.

The main drag is wall to wall bars, clubs and restaurants and it also has the best beaches - they import white sand from Africa, whereas everywhere else has volcanic sand, which is black and slightly sticky.

I'm not sure there are many really shitty hotels, they've been doing tourists for a long time now, so they've pretty much got it sussed, I would probably go self catering apartment, then you aren't tied to meal times and you can come and go when you like.

It isn't the cheapest place on the planet (they took the opportunity to hike everything up when they changed to euros) but £750 a week should be enough.

I always used to go over Xmas, but the run up to it should be OK and you can avoid families if you time it right.

Can't comment on drugs, never been offered them there and don't use them if I had, so you'll have to research that elsewhere.


Thank you kind sir. Smile
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P.
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PostPosted: 21:11 - 20 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hetzer wrote:
Paddy. wrote:
1500 is about 3 times too much to enjoy yourself. Laughing


Including drugs? Mr. Green


Never tried, I went to Lanzarote close by and I've never had such a piss up Laughing I spent 30-40 euros a night, for both of us on food. Hotels, I would always go private lodgings, on block pools, never an issue.

Left side of tenerife is where it's at, worth hiring a bike if you want to ride around, they rent harleys!!
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MCN
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PostPosted: 18:22 - 21 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Any of the Canary islands are good. Nicer peeps than mainland Spain too.
750 per week is enough as long as you don't pay for secks. Embarassed
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stevo as b4
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PostPosted: 19:41 - 21 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

There's tons of pushy big Africans everywhere selling watches and probably lots of other stuff too.

I stayed near Playa de Las americas, but it's still a short taxi ride from the main resort and shops/bars/cafes to what they called the strip where all the clubs and big bars are.

We stayed half board in a decent hotel with a huge pool and island bar. We used to go every other night to the strip and then drink in the local bars in the town on the other nights. It was ok but not mega busy in the local bars.

Went into a funky neon bar one night (was almost dragged in by the staff) and inside at the front was a bar which was dead, but there was a stage at the back surrounded by semi enclosed bays of big comfy seating like an American diner all around the outside. As soon as I had a beer in my hand all these Russian and Lithuanian strippers appeared and said "come with me to the back for a private special dance for 40euros". I'm not the brightest at sussing places out immediately as I step through the door, but we downed our beers bottled it and dashed out of the door before anything else happened. It didn't look like the sort of place you could just say we'll sit and drink our beer and just watch you dance. They really wanted your money!

Tenerife has some great bits though, Mount Teidi is worth going up to see all the black aero texture rocks, and the mountain does have some good roads leading up to it. It'd be great to have a bike for a day or two there!

But the best thing about Tenerife, far better than the sandy beaches even was the biggest and best Waterpark in Europe at the time anyway. I spent two separate days there scaring myself silly on water rides and jumping off rocks into pools etc.

Dont really know much about the availability of drugs, but if its a constant supply of drugs, from cannabis, coke, crack or heroin then I'd say go on a city break to Lisbon in Portugal. Its a beautiful city, but terrible for cars and getting around by road. But as soon as you leave your hotel/apartment your almost constantly offered all the above substances, and by people in cafes, markets, Middle of the street outside the fashion district, and even by the taxi drivers. If I wanted to be stoned for a week its probably where I'd go.
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 19:58 - 21 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

stevo as b4 wrote:
the black aero texture rocks

I think the technical term is "scoria"
Thinking

Do you mean the stuff that is kinda black but pitted with holes and thus quite light, so when you walk up a slope composed mostly of it, you take three steps forward and two steps back Laughing

They have that on Rangitoto in Auckland Harbour, its a fucker to get up, but hilarious fun when you're a teenager.
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Hetzer
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PostPosted: 23:35 - 22 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks for the info guys. Smile

We've booked a 5-star in Adeje, not far from Las Americas (palmos de or whatever) and a car (160 euros for the fortnight, fuck me gently, that's cheap. Auto Reisen, seems like they're one of the few that don't fuck you in the ass with various scams). £949pp. The waterpark sounds like a must-do. I think we'll be doing some scuba-diving too, 70 euros a pop for just under an hour. Other than that it'll be picnics in the back of beyond, beaches, bars, clubs and restaurants. First holiday in over ten years and the first just the two of us (last one was when I joined the wife and kids in Japan for a month, while they were there for a year so the kids could become fluent in Japanese).

The drugs thing was a joke, coke does SFA for me and the mandy will be molly wearing a hat, no thanks. A bit of weed might be nice though. Smile
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kawakid
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PostPosted: 11:44 - 26 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

For one of your days, I strongly recommend a day trip to the neighbouring Island La Gomera.

We had to be up early like 6am and a tour bus came and took is to the ferry (you'll need your passports), La Gomera was awesome, an absolutely beautiful mountainous green Island.

The tour takes you to a nature reserve high up, where the plants weren't affected by the ice age, dandelion plants were huge, canary birds could be seen. We stopped off to see La Palma and El Hero in the distance, lunch and wine was included and the restaurant had the most amazing view.

There's lots of excursion shops in your area and I think it cost about €80.
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MarJay
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PostPosted: 13:20 - 26 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Me and the other half went for a week last year. I think it cost us about £200 total in spending money but we did have half board.
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Bhud
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PostPosted: 23:19 - 26 Oct 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Never been there, but a relative has, and they were disappointed because they were stuck in one place and didn't hire a vehicle. The place they stayed in was in the south, it was a large and boring characterless resort town and they had booked it without knowing it was just a sort of sun-and-sand escape (which could be anywhere sunny) oriented towards the homosexual community. On the other hand, an old mate of mine is into ocean swimming and water-based sports - he's really serious about serious swimming and has almost died a few times while indulging that hobby, and he swears by Tenerife. So what I take from this is, it's good to do a bit of research about the place you're staying and where you want to go and what you want to do before you leave, and having personal transport (a moped would probably be sufficient) is a must to get you around the island. There's a lot to do there but it's not much cop if you're 2 or 3 days into your holiday and perusing bus timetables and tour companies' brochures looking for something to do.
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Phoenix
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PostPosted: 06:01 - 02 Nov 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Costa Adeje is probably the best choice imo, been a couple of times and stayed there both times, it's fairly quiet and much nicer than Playa de las Americas but easy walking distance to get there, I stayed at an Iberostar the first time which was crap, Airbnb apartment the next time which was way better and half the price.

The capital is not really worth visiting imo but Puerto De La Cruz in the north is, it's much more Spanish than tourist town of the South West. Can day trip there via Teide and back via Masca in the NW.

Gran Canaria is an absolute dump compared to Tenerife so good choice there.
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Bubbs
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PostPosted: 11:47 - 11 Nov 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tenerife is rubbish... Elevenerife is much better!!
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chris-red
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PostPosted: 16:00 - 11 Nov 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Been to Lanzagrote and Forte Ventura.

Price wise it was cheap AF. I don't think I ever paid more than 1.50euro for a beer. A slap up meal for 2 with drinks was ~60 Euro generally they throw in free drinks if you are polite and Friendly. One night we went out had a 3 course meal and between us 14 beers a cocktail and 4 shorts. I think we only paid for 9 beers and the cocktail.

See about Motorbike hire. Both times I hired a bike and 24 hours was about ~50euro. You don't need a big bike, I had a little Suzuki 250 the first time and it was perfect for the island. The second time I had a CB500x. It's a great way to see the islands.
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Hetzer
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PostPosted: 03:01 - 15 Nov 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

chris-red wrote:
Been to Lanzagrote and Forte Ventura.

Price wise it was cheap AF. I don't think I ever paid more than 1.50euro for a beer. A slap up meal for 2 with drinks was ~60 Euro generally they throw in free drinks if you are polite and Friendly. One night we went out had a 3 course meal and between us 14 beers a cocktail and 4 shorts. I think we only paid for 9 beers and the cocktail.

See about Motorbike hire. Both times I hired a bike and 24 hours was about ~50euro. You don't need a big bike, I had a little Suzuki 250 the first time and it was perfect for the island. The second time I had a CB500x. It's a great way to see the islands.


We've booked a car, 160e for the fortnight. Smile
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Ribenapigeon
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PostPosted: 22:37 - 18 Nov 2019    Post subject: Reply with quote

Basically, east coast trashy in varying degrees of cost, west coast more sedate, south coast also more sedate. Everywhere cheap to eat out three times a day and well within your budget. Worth hiring a vehicle as the mountainous central area well worth exploring with lots of cool little villages with eateries. You can basically eat and booze yourself to death with ease. If I get a chance to go again and "she who has the properly paid job" agrees I would go back to a place called Los Gigantes either self catering or four star half board and hire a car.
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