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eBay's Most Miserable Bike

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WD Forte
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PostPosted: 16:29 - 22 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

I liked that Ural as it was, it had a bit of character about it

https://scontent-lhr8-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t45.5328-4/p720x720/256188817_4981524295191715_1988160912029856465_n.jpg?_nc_cat=104&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=c48759&_nc_ohc=HzPvAiNscN8AX8S2yWK&_nc_ht=scontent-lhr8-2.xx&oh=6d979b7be2d68f7f4a29427b50bcc7fc&oe=61A0840C

Now its just another sad cafe.


https://scontent-lhr8-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t45.5328-4/s960x960/257432257_4566215646792037_6199376292688510809_n.jpg?_nc_cat=105&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=c48759&_nc_ohc=cmbGJD1bY7UAX_l8SnE&_nc_ht=scontent-lhr8-2.xx&oh=70fee8548609b750b2e8f7cfc9c48a71&oe=619FFE4D
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Islander
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PostPosted: 17:49 - 22 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

It does take a special kind of moron to put pods on a boxer. Still it'll only be used for dry weather 'adventures' to the local overpriced coffee poser's emporium. Laughing
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Zen Dog
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PostPosted: 19:32 - 24 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

"All original parts to return it to standard are included in sale"

At least there's no permanent damage done, seems like you could reverse the twattery in fairly short order. And the cafe racer nonsense will probably drive the price down a bit. All in all, seems like a win compared to many of the horrors on this thread.
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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 21:28 - 24 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cookie-cutter Café Racer Sad

https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/tbUAAOSwKs5hgGVr/s-l1600.jpg

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/313748567544
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A100man
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PostPosted: 10:57 - 25 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Easy-X wrote:


Meh, stick some mudguards on and mebbe some proper silencers and I'd ride that without too much shame..
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A100man
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PostPosted: 10:58 - 25 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

I prefer the 1970 original though..
https://cdn1.mecum.com/auctions/lv0121/lv0121-435211/images/1-1615901637946@2x.jpg?1619889831000
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Bhud
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PostPosted: 18:08 - 25 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Don't know if you lot have seen those old Kent custom chopper videos on Youtube, but this Ebay monstrosity seems to be an oddly 80s form of sacrilege:

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/403281900008

I don't know what was going through his mind. Sadly, a classic Z650 was sacrificed on the pyre of image to make that thing.
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Weisse Schlange
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PostPosted: 20:01 - 25 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

WD Forte wrote:



Someone should be shot in the balls for that.
The original is a properly cool bike.

They have fucked it up the arse with an ugly wank pole.
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virus
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PostPosted: 21:04 - 25 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

WD Forte wrote:



What a waste of a perfectly good motorcycle
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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 21:18 - 25 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Something magical...

https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/2gsAAOSw8j9hiPrS/s-l1600.jpg

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/324892349776
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Shaft
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PostPosted: 21:21 - 25 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Easy-X wrote:
Something magical...



As in 'you'll like this, not a lot'?
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A100man
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PostPosted: 23:40 - 25 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Easy-X wrote:


at least he got the price right.
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Blah blah
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PostPosted: 17:26 - 27 Nov 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Easy-X wrote:


..."almost finished but Ian not clever enough to professionally weld"... (sic) and 2 different number plates.

I wonder what the scrap value is?
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A100man
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PostPosted: 15:09 - 06 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ok not ebay but still..

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/auctions/1995-bmw-k75-cafe-racer-8GlxPg

'Agonisingly cool'
if you're a complete cnut maybe.


'..the 750cc engine has been fully rebuilt'

Is that so? My hairy arse it has..
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Fat Angry Scotsman
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PostPosted: 15:13 - 06 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

A100man wrote:
Ok not ebay but still..

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/auctions/1995-bmw-k75-cafe-racer-8GlxPg

'Agonisingly cool'
if you're a complete cnut maybe.


'..the 750cc engine has been fully rebuilt'

Is that so? My hairy arse it has..


I guess having the fuses exposed means this thing is strictly a no-rain day ride? Embarassed Fuck me it's hideous.
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Nobby the Bastard
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PostPosted: 15:21 - 06 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why would you put knobblies on a cafe racer?
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WD Forte
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PostPosted: 15:40 - 06 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

A100man wrote:
Ok not ebay but still..

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/auctions/1995-bmw-k75-cafe-racer-8GlxPg

'Agonisingly cool'
if you're a complete cnut maybe.


'..the 750cc engine has been fully rebuilt'

Is that so? My hairy arse it has..


FFS have any of these fuckers ever actually ridden a bike?
that thing is of no use and of very little ornament.
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Easy-X
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PostPosted: 19:19 - 06 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

A100man wrote:
Ok not ebay but still..

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/auctions/1995-bmw-k75-cafe-racer-8GlxPg

'Agonisingly cool'
if you're a complete cnut maybe.


'..the 750cc engine has been fully rebuilt'

Is that so? My hairy arse it has..


Like a broken lift - wrong on so many levels Sad

https://assets.carandclassic.co.uk/listing-assets/bmw/k75/1995-bmw-k75-cafe-racer-g2mQp8/37O4nAVFn7UMbQe5fyOzbpEnIwrTrkaPXto0aURJ.jpg?ar=16%3A9&auto=compress&fit=crop&h=338&ixlib=php-3.3.1&q=75&w=600&s=00c063f4ed6fabedc8b5d541b7fe8a37

Knobbly tyres on cast wheels... just why? Exposed wiring, tank looks wrong, seat is wrong, wrong wrong wrong! Mad
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A100man
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PostPosted: 20:54 - 06 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

A100man wrote:
Ok not ebay but still..

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/auctions/1995-bmw-k75-cafe-racer-8GlxPg

'Agonisingly cool'
if you're a complete cnut maybe.


'..the 750cc engine has been fully rebuilt'

Is that so? My hairy arse it has..


It was purchased by the vendor in 2020 and he decided that he would use it to create a bespoke custom build that was in line with a vision he'd had for quite some time.

..and yet the tyres show it has no road miles and it's very doubtful it even has an MOT (no rear light or number plate etc..) So I'd say that makes the vendor a complete twat.
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A100man
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PostPosted: 10:55 - 07 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

God preserve us.. yet another of the b*****

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/auctions/1984-bmw-k100-flat-tracker-gZ0ea4?

Bit of tube for the rear brake reservoir? You pitiful tosser.
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Fat Angry Scotsman
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PostPosted: 11:57 - 07 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

A100man wrote:
God preserve us.. yet another of the b*****

https://www.carandclassic.co.uk/auctions/1984-bmw-k100-flat-tracker-gZ0ea4?

Bit of tube for the rear brake reservoir? You pitiful tosser.


£5,000 - £8,000 for a bike that hasn't passed an MOT since it was "converted" to a piece of shit? Wtf?

Auctioneer's Gobshite wrote:
some of the welding on the exhaust system and inlet filter shows signs of rust. However, one could quite easily say that this is part of the bike’s patina and its character.


Laughing In that case my 12 year old Kwak has plenty of patina and character too! How much extra to the sell-on price can I get now? I mean, mine actually has an MOT too as a bonus.

Auctioneer's Gobshite wrote:
According to the owner, the inline-four motor was stripped and rebuilt during the course of the overall bike build


Laughing sure it was

Auctioneer's Gobshite wrote:
The exhaust note is surprisingly subdued but it has a very visceral character to it, much like the bike as a whole.


Fucking lol'd at "visceral". That bike is a shed mate. Literally has a piece of pipe held on by a jubilee clip as a reservoir Laughing

Auctioneer's Gobshite wrote:
While it does not currently have an MoT, and hence will need to be trailered away or taken in a van, the owner confirms that he recently rode it off-road at a friend’s farm and that everything operates as it should.


That's me sold, I am always happy to punt £5,000 - £8,000 on the fact the guy desperate to sell it said he rode it around his mates farm and everything is amazing obviously.
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A100man
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PostPosted: 15:06 - 20 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sigh..


https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/334259666781?

.. didn't even get around to cutting the frame - thankfully.
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Bhud
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PostPosted: 15:16 - 20 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

A100man wrote:
Sigh..


https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/334259666781?

.. didn't even get around to cutting the frame - thankfully.


He's done plenty of damage, and he hasn't even got it working. I don't know why, but it still amazes me that people do that. "Oh, getting it to work is the easy part. I'm going to unnecessarily replace the 4-into-1 and rip off the tail end. It's an art!"

I feel like putting in a bid, but I've been there and done that with 550s, albeit with a Kawasaki. Whose turn is it to waste their money next?
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Polarbear
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PostPosted: 18:05 - 20 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bhud wrote:
A100man wrote:
Sigh..


https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/334259666781?

.. didn't even get around to cutting the frame - thankfully.


He's done plenty of damage, and he hasn't even got it working. I don't know why, but it still amazes me that people do that. "Oh, getting it to work is the easy part. I'm going to unnecessarily replace the 4-into-1 and rip off the tail end. It's an art!"

I feel like putting in a bid, but I've been there and done that with 550s, albeit with a Kawasaki. Whose turn is it to waste their money next?


The thing is, it is art. Just like paintings, some people like Constable, some like Warhole. Look at it like us sensible people like old masters, twats who do that to bikes like Damien Hirst.

Sheep in formaldehyde for the disbelievers, a Ural outfit with reverse gear anf fuck off big machinegun for the true followers. Thumbs Up
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Zen Dog
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PostPosted: 19:20 - 21 Dec 2021    Post subject: Reply with quote

Polarbear wrote:
The thing is, it is art. Just like paintings, some people like Constable, some like Warhole. Look at it like us sensible people like old masters, twats who do that to bikes like Damien Hirst.

Sheep in formaldehyde for the disbelievers, a Ural outfit with reverse gear anf fuck off big machinegun for the true followers. Thumbs Up


Warhol's technique is probably the best analogy to be honest. Take something that already existed and make a (almost certainly crappier) version of it.
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