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stinkwheel
Bovine Proctologist



Joined: 12 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 01:32 - 16 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

hellkat wrote:
Sitting on the stump of a pohutukawa tree in the dark, listening to the surf and smoking a spliff.
Auckland beaches: fucking awesome Cool


Beached az?
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I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.
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to v or not to v
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PostPosted: 20:58 - 16 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

hellkat wrote:
Sitting on the stump of a pohutukawa tree in the dark, listening to the surf and smoking a spliff.
Auckland beaches: fucking awesome Cool


travels half way round the world and still cant keep off the forum Mr. Green
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grr666
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PostPosted: 21:43 - 18 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

I got to pick who gets to repair my exhaust today...

I now have to wait until up to January 13th for an initial appointment delve into my underworld, god knows
how long it will be until they get a scalpel to work up there. Opted for treatment at the private clinic rather then
the Bristol Royal infirmary which is a horrible grubby hospital. It does sound like something from a porn movie though. Laughing
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Nobby the Bastard
Harley Gaydar



Joined: 16 Aug 2013
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PostPosted: 21:56 - 18 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

Do you take the wine, candles and the flowers or does the doctor? Do you go dutch or does the doctor have to pay for the meal first?
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Ste
Not Work Safe



Joined: 01 Sep 2002
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PostPosted: 22:29 - 18 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

grr666 wrote:
January 13th for an initial appointment

Thinking

If you see any unattended rolls of some certain stickers then you should acquire them.

https://i.imgur.com/VDUhyps.jpg

Rain
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grr666
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PostPosted: 23:36 - 18 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ste wrote:
grr666 wrote:
January 13th for an initial appointment

Thinking

Yes, it's great service isn't it. Really worth donkeys years of NI contributions. Thumbs Up Rolling Eyes
I'll get just the appointment date for an actual physical examination BY mid January. Then who knows when
that appointment will actually be. Probably after a couple more months of discomfort laced with periods of agonising
pain until I'm seen in person. Then once a type of treatment has been determined once I've actually seen a doctor IRL
sometime next year. I'll then go on the waiting list for the treatment needed to fix the problem.

Fantastic level of patient care, I do wonder if we haven't become a third world country that still charges first world
prices for what is ultimately appalling care. I'm not trying to get treatment for a sore elbow here, I'm bleeding from
my arse and it hurts to take a dump every day. I can see me shelling out for this myself and going full private, I'm not
sure how much more of this I can take, certainly not several more months of it until the NHS condescends to give me
treatment I've been paying for on layaway for years.
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stinkwheel
Bovine Proctologist



Joined: 12 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 02:38 - 19 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

grr666 wrote:

I'm not trying to get treatment for a sore elbow here, I'm bleeding from
my arse and it hurts to take a dump every day. I can see me shelling out for this myself and going full private, I'm not
sure how much more of this I can take, certainly not several more months of it until the NHS condescends to give me
treatment I've been paying for on layaway for years.


Yes, phone BUPA. Couple of years ago, I couldn't piss. Well, I could but it was taking a good 5 minutes. In fariness, they checked out it wasn't a prostate problem but then said I'd have an appointment to see a urologist within 3 months... ffs, I can't piss NOW and I know enough about medicine to know not emptying your bladder fully (because there's only so long you can take before you give up) will lead to bigger problems down the line.

Called BUPA, Had an appointment with a consultant urologist specialising in mens bits the following week where I was examined then sent for x-rays, ultrasound and flow measurement. By that I mean I went downstairs, had all that done then went back up by which time he had the results and told me I had a stricture. Booked in 10 days later for surgery and a CT scan to make sure a renal cyst that showed up on the scan was nothing to worry about (it wasn't).

Hospital was clean, well equipped and pleasant, individual room for the day, courteous and understanding staff.

Came in well under the price of a akro exhaust system for your new bike.
____________________
“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.
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Easy-X
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Joined: 08 Mar 2019
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PostPosted: 02:51 - 19 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ste wrote:
grr666 wrote:
January 13th for an initial appointment

Thinking

If you see any unattended rolls of some certain stickers then you should acquire them.

https://i.imgur.com/VDUhyps.jpg

Rain


ffs, are you getting them wholesale?! Laughing
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grr666
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Joined: 16 Jun 2014
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PostPosted: 09:53 - 19 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

stinkwheel wrote:

Came in well under the price of a akro exhaust system for your new bike.

Already bought one of those. Laughing I'm not concerned about how much it might cost, I have the money to pay for treatment.
It's the principle, why should I pay twice? What pisses me off is that as a tax and NI payer, I get worse treatment than
a fucking dole/disability scratcher who contributes zero to the health service and more often than not are the very
same people clogging up the system (no pun intended) so they can keep their spurious sick note claims ongoing.
I've said for years that the NHS and DSS are reliant on each other, each sending a steady stream of 'clients' to
the other.

On a slightly more positive note, I just dropped a deuce today that was painful initially as expected, but my steady
diet of soft fruit, baked beans, lactulose AND Dulcolax over the last few days made it past the blockage and came
out like an amphetamine charged, greased eel. It was of significant heft, crowning the water by a good four inches.
Flattening my by now almost pregnant looking stomach by a similar margin and causing the loo to nearly overflow
upon flushing, even though there was no paper in the bowl. It's the (not so) small things. Laughing I shall price up a
fully private poo chute rejuvenation procedure forthwith.
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stinkwheel
Bovine Proctologist



Joined: 12 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 10:56 - 19 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

On the basis you're blaming stopping smoking for this, you should take a picture of your ringpiece now and if you're ever tempted to have a cigarette again, have a look at it first.
____________________
“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.
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grr666
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Joined: 16 Jun 2014
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PostPosted: 11:29 - 19 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

stinkwheel wrote:
On the basis you're blaming stopping smoking for this, you should take a picture of your ringpiece now and if you're ever tempted to have a cigarette again, have a look at it first.


Good advice, I really shouldn't have started up again, particularly after nearly nine years completely tobacco free
and especially since the exact same thing happened the first time I quit, also requiring unpleasant surgical intervention
after the fact. I was a fucking idiot starting smoking again, but I was having a tough time in my life, with no tangible
support whatsoever despite my best efforts to get some from the reliably unfit for purpose NHS and slipped back into old
habits as a cope. I won't be relapsing a second time.

As I've learned to my considerable discomfort, relapse=prolapse.
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Diggs
World Chat Champion



Joined: 03 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: 11:51 - 19 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
What pisses me off is that as a tax and NI payer, I get worse treatment than
a fucking dole/disability scratcher who contributes zero to the health service and more often than not are the very
same people clogging up the system (no pun intended) so they can keep their spurious sick note claims ongoing.


I suspect you are getting the same treatment...
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Diggs
World Chat Champion



Joined: 03 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: 12:05 - 19 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

stinkwheel wrote:
On the basis you're blaming stopping smoking for this, you should take a picture of your ringpiece now and if you're ever tempted to have a cigarette again, have a look at it first.


The expression 'bumhole like a blood orange' springs to mind....
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Gone (in order of ownership) - Raleigh Runabout, AP50, KH125, GP125, KH250, CBX550, Z400, CB750FII, 250LC, GS550, ZXR750H1, Guzzi Targa, GSX750F, KH250 x2, Bimota SB6R and counting...
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hellkat
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Joined: 12 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 08:48 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

to v or not to v wrote:
hellkat wrote:
Sitting on the stump of a pohutukawa tree in the dark, listening to the surf and smoking a spliff.
Auckland beaches: fucking awesome Cool


travels half way round the world and still cant keep off the forum Mr. Green


Ya well I just thought I'd share my joy with youse fellas, LOL
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hellkat
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PostPosted: 09:37 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mum and I stopped to help a chap who had somehow fallen off his BMW ?F800GT (is that a thing?) and ended up with a broken tib/fib.

I went to visit him in the hospital as it's just across the road from Mum's place, and I discovered he has a great view of my old high school.
So that was nice.
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yen_powell
World Chat Champion



Joined: 22 Jun 2008
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PostPosted: 14:45 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

grr666 wrote:
stinkwheel wrote:
On the basis you're blaming stopping smoking for this, you should take a picture of your ringpiece now and if you're ever tempted to have a cigarette again, have a look at it first.


Good advice, I really shouldn't have started up again, particularly after nearly nine years completely tobacco free
and especially since the exact same thing happened the first time I quit, also requiring unpleasant surgical intervention
after the fact. I was a fucking idiot starting smoking again, but I was having a tough time in my life, with no tangible
support whatsoever despite my best efforts to get some from the reliably unfit for purpose NHS and slipped back into old
habits as a cope. I won't be relapsing a second time.

As I've learned to my considerable discomfort, relapse=prolapse.
You are supposed to smoke via your mouth not your arse you know.
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grr666
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Joined: 16 Jun 2014
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PostPosted: 17:57 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

yen_powell wrote:
You are supposed to smoke via your mouth not your arse you know.

Smoke rings mate Wink
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pepperami
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Joined: 17 Jan 2010
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PostPosted: 19:37 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yet again Mr Grr666 the saga of your bum hole predicament is making me laugh until my eyes are in tears!

Mr Stinkwheel suggested that you take a picture of your bum hole! Shocked .
I have visions of you and your camera phone in all sorts awkward positions Shocked Shocked !
“Look at the camera and say cheese” Laughing


Sorry Embarassed it can’t be funny for you .
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Freddyfruitba...
World Chat Champion



Joined: 20 May 2016
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PostPosted: 20:12 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

hellkat wrote:
Mum and I stopped to help a chap who had somehow fallen off his BMW ?F800GT (is that a thing?) and ended up with a broken tib/fib.

Wow, that's really bad luck, kindly stopping to help someone and breaking your leg... Crying or Very sad

As it happens, I had the great fortune to spend a couple of weeks touring NZ two or three years ago, on.... a BMW F800GT. Happy days. Wonder if it was the same one?
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Freddyfruitba...
World Chat Champion



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PostPosted: 20:24 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

stinkwheel wrote:
Had an appointment with a consultant urologist specialising in mens bits the following week where I was examined then sent for x-rays, ultrasound and flow measurement. By that I mean I went downstairs, had all that done then went back up by which time he had the results and told me I had a stricture. Booked in 10 days later for surgery

I have exactly the same problem and also have a stricture; have had several waterworks infections over the years which is pretty unusual in men. Have had several cameras rammed up my tubes which I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. My stricture isn't as severe as yours (yet Crying or Very sad ) and nobody's suggesting surgery imminently; but did that work well for you? How did that go, dare I ask? My consultant told me the next step if/when necessary would be sequential dilation of my urethra by progressively wider rods, but that it was only a temporary solution Pale

(why are we in "...oiled my gears..."?)
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grr666
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PostPosted: 20:36 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

pepperami wrote:

Sorry Embarassed it can’t be funny for you .

As painful as it sometimes is, the humour isn't lost on me. I guess I'm the butt of my own jokes. Wink
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stinkwheel
Bovine Proctologist



Joined: 12 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 21:33 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

Freddyfruitbat wrote:

I have exactly the same problem and also have a stricture; have had several waterworks infections over the years which is pretty unusual in men. Have had several cameras rammed up my tubes which I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. My stricture isn't as severe as yours (yet Crying or Very sad ) and nobody's suggesting surgery imminently; but did that work well for you? How did that go, dare I ask? My consultant told me the next step if/when necessary would be sequential dilation of my urethra by progressively wider rods, but that it was only a temporary solution Pale

(why are we in "...oiled my gears..."?)


It's all grr666s fault for stopping smoking.

I started a mens health thread.
https://www.bikechatforums.com/viewtopic.php?t=335005
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“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.
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recman
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Joined: 26 Mar 2012
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PostPosted: 22:06 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

grr666 wrote:
pepperami wrote:

Sorry Embarassed it can’t be funny for you .

As painful as it sometimes is, the humour isn't lost on me. I guess I'm the butt of my own jokes. Wink


At least you were still able to get in 100 miles on the bike.
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grr666
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PostPosted: 22:35 - 20 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

recman wrote:

At least you were still able to get in 100 miles on the bike.

200 left to do before 19th December and first service. Might have revved it out enough yesterday to get my front wheel
skipping up and down a bit Embarassed I think I'm going to have to learn to ride it again once I can spank it properly. Not
that it feels like a slouch now, I reckon the really frantic, arse clenching (don't go there Tut Tut) stuff is yet to come.
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Hong Kong Phooey
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PostPosted: 11:37 - 21 Nov 2022    Post subject: Reply with quote

grr666 wrote:
recman wrote:

At least you were still able to get in 100 miles on the bike.

200 left to do before 19th December and first service. Might have revved it out enough yesterday to get my front wheel
skipping up and down a bit Embarassed I think I'm going to have to learn to ride it again once I can spank it properly. Not
that it feels like a slouch now, I reckon the really frantic, arse clenching (don't go there Tut Tut) stuff is yet to come.


We're all rooting for the day when you're able to fully let rip, leaving massive skid marks on the ring road again.
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