Cold Calling

[Zen Dog]

My housemate actually spent 3 or 4 months patiently telling cold callers we dont want their crap. It didnt make a blind bit of difference, the same companies still call, and offer us stuff that we didnt want when they called the first time.

Now whoever they ask for (its usually a guy that moved out of the house before we moved in about 2 years ago), i just say "I'll just go get him/her", then lay the phone down on the sofa and go back to whatever i was doing. After half an hour or so i go and put it back on the hook.

At least, thats what i usually do, but its been going on so long now that we're starting to get more inventive. Like getting them to reel off their entire sales speech, ask loads of questions, sound keen, and when you've got the maximum effort out of them possible, tell them you dont buy off cold callers on principle and put the phone down.

Another fun one is to ask them if cold calling bothers them in their personal life. If they say no, ask them for their home phone number. If they say yes, you can have a whole conversation about the meaning of the word "hypocrisy". Another variation is simply to try to sell THEM stuff, bog brushes, chocolate teapots, whatever you like.

Anyone else got any effective, or at least fun ways to deal with cold calling?

Zen Dog

P.S. Anyone know how to get on that "no cold calling register" thingy?
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Current - '94 VFR750FR (Dead), '00 VFR800FI, '11 600 Hornet - Previous - '11 CBF125, '10 Street Triple R, '92 MZ ETZ301, '05 TTR250, NSR125R, KMX125, "Honda" Win
My bike trip around S.E. Asia 2010/2011

[Ste]

Ask them to marry you.

[0ni]

**Heavy Breathing** "Are you wearing any underwear?" **Heavy Breathing**
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Its a lovely day, just wait until some bastard spoils it.

[getyerkneedow...]

Granted cold calling is annoying, especially if its around t time etc.. .however when its cold calling business to business it is a very good way of drumming up new business.

Im currently working for a company called Global Procurement Group, we're cold calling consultants to get them to become licensed affiliates of GPG and thus aggregate a £2.4 Bn consultancy industry to allow SME's (small to medium enterprises) to work alongside large suppliers and service suppliers.

Generally speaking I have 20 seconds in which to pitch the MD, or BDM of a company to get their interest, after that 20 second window, its a case of make or break. They will be interested, then raport is built and the sale made, or they aint interested and you move on.

It is hard to do, cold calling, it requires a lot of tenasity, but that is why companies generally pay cold callers an aweful lot of money, both in basic salary and commission/bonus.

Im currently on £16 basic, and about another 6-7K pa if im on target.

In 5 years time, when im an account manager im inline for a £350K bonus for my time and services with GPG... so there are lots of big incentives.

Yes cold callers are annoying - but people do it as its a good route to market, and the salaries are generally very very good, if you like a challenge and working to KPI's etc.

GYKD

www.gpgengland.com

[getyerkneedow...]

[biggerjohn]

I now just hang up

But I have done all of these

Belch/fart loudly and ask for a score

Give the phone to my 6 month old nephew to play with

Start the modem of screeching down the line (ok I am old)

Hello dominos pizza

“You have reached the bestiality chat hot line calls will be billed at……..

I know where you live

Do you shag of first dates?

“Milky Milky”

Do you know a good way to remove human blood from carpets?


Please hold the line your call is important to us (starts huming green sleeves) please hold…..

[Kickstart]

Hi

As well as the telephone preference service, change your number to an ex directory one.

All the best

Keith
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Traxpics, track day and racing photographs - Bimota Forum - Bike performance / thrust graphs for choosing gearing

[Mrs Kickstart]

Hi,

The address for the TPS is https://www.tpsonline.org.uk

From there you can stop calls, mail and email providing the company is reputable and checks.

I would also register the previous tennant if you know his name.

If you get many more calls then get their details and report them.

Also to stop the automated slient calls call the Silent Callgard Service on 0870 4443969


Regards

Charlotte

[?M?gg????]

This one works on the phone or at the door. Let them waffle on for a while then tell them that you don't actually live here and explain that you're a burglar and have to get back to robbing the place as the owners are due back in about half an hour. What's even funnier is if they call back half an hour later
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Bandit 600, TDM 850,Bandit 1200
One by one the penguins steal my sanity.

[stinkwheel]

[Mrs Kickstart]

[karen_moomin]

At work we get a lot of cold callers trying to sell us all sorts of things, such as better telephone deals, stationary, anything really. They often ask to speak to the MD, I really enjoy hanging up on them, or pretending that I'm the MD, or just stringing them along. (The MD encourages me to do so - anything to get rid of them!)

I might try some of the things mentioned already next time, I particulary like the asking for their number one.

[Sparks!]

[Project9928]

I am waiting to use one of the sound boards off www.ebaumsworld.com on one of these cold callers. But now none of them seem to ring anymore Lol never one when you need them

[instigator]

No yams....you really don't want to do it...really.

It is a scummy job and only a special type of person can do it - one that goes home at night and doesn't give a crap what they;ve been doing all day.

I tried it as a student, pay was very good, but I felt like a scumbag whilst doing it. I ended up just telling them why NOT to buy the product and jsut talked to old pensioners about life in general for the day. Only lasted 4 days until I walked out....

[Sparks!]

[Sparks!]

[karen_moomin]

We've currently got a student in doing telesales. For the first week he looked like he wanted to top himself and was simply crap at it.

Now he's got to know us and seen what fun we have and how to actually speak to people on the phone he's getting into it and producing some good leads. Then again, our "cold calling" is different because it's calling companies regarding environmental regulations they need to know about and comply with.

Personally I hate doing it for prolonged periods. I do it now and again when I get bored, but only because I have the confidence and I'm doing it out of choice. There is no way I could do it day in, day out...no chance. It's boring - no closing down the deal or any real job satisfaction.

[G]

[Sparks!]

We've tried a few over the years too!

Someone once come to our front door trying to sell that gravel type wall covering they stick on outside of houses..

My mum told the bloke in a very serious manner that she couldn't have the coating because our house was fitted with special air bricks that kept the house warm in the winter and cool in the summer.

She spent about 10 mins explaining to this bloke about them before he realised she was winding him up he saw the funny side of it at least and got the point and left..

Had window people ring up and have said "sorry but we do not have any windows" hehe

When I used to work in the office I kept getting calls from some company trying to sell labels for the franking machine, I always declined and said we had enough to last us a year or so etc, but they always called back every week or so so one time I put the phone down on her as soon as she said what it was about.. got a call 5 mins later and she said she'd been cut off, I said "nope, I put the phone down on you" so she started having a go at me saying it was rude hehehehe
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Current Toys: 06 Yamaha WR250F | Nissan 350Z GT | Tech 4 Homes

[HurtMePlease]

Whatever happened to simply picking up the phone and putting it back down again?

simple but effective.
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Hear Thy Call..............................
Rs125 (97) <-Sold|Riding->ZXR400L2(92) Yamaha R6(01)

[SteWhit]

I once told a double glazing salesman we lived in a caravan with Perspex windows... didn't take him long to hang up lol

[Zen Dog]

[headlamp]

[Liono]

I quite enjoy getting cold calls and if I'm not too busy I will generally try to keep them on the phone for as long as possible by talking absolute bollocks to them. I had one bloke ring up trying to flog me a camera phone, but he got a bit annoyed when I kept asking him where to send the film to get it developed. My all time record was getting put through to somebody who I assume was some sort of call center manager as the first person couldn't answer my questions so she passed me to her supervisor who in turn was a bit confused, so I eventually got passed through to somebody above the supervisor. Another favourite is giving them long complicated names like Montmerency Tarquin Cholmendely-Warner so you have to spend ages spelling them out phoenetically using odd words instead of the usual alpha bravo etc. Then get them to read it back and pretend to get annoyed and then tell them to swap a load of letters around, eg "swap the g for an f, the h for an i then you have it spelt right."