Relationship advice people...

[cyprinis]

hi,

I recently split up from my girlfriend of a year and a bit, and I'm slowly gettin used to the idea of being single. I split up with her, because she tried to stop me seeing friends (one in particular) with bikes.

She never liked the idea of me having a bike and said that if I got one, she would dump me. This didn't happen when I passed my test in october though...

I got back from a ride last weekend with this particular mate, and was told that I wouldn't be seeing him outside of work again. Needless to say, I hit the f**kin roof, packed her stuff and took her home.

Being 20, I don't think I really need that, but it's just the idea of being without someone again, because I was going out with her best mate for two years before I started with her.

She's keen to get back together in a couple of weeks, but I'm not sure what to do.

I got a text from her today:

"hi! just wondered wot ur up 2 2nite? fancy comin round for a chat, a cup of tea and maybe some casual sex if ur up 4 it. i know what ur thinkin - dirty bitch, but give me a call if u want to."

Any advice people?

Thanks

[veeeffarr]

Stay away from her and don't contact her.

Make sure it's a clean break.

[Irezumi aka Reuben]

If she's offering chocolate bourbon's with the tea I'd be tempted personally.
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Pictorgraphicalfantastical

[illusion]

I'd steer clear if I were you, sounds like she has low self esteem and wants to control you. You can either bend over and take it up the gary glitter from a big hairy biker or be a man and cut off contact with her
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My bike

[cyprinis]

I don't quite get what your saying illusion....

where did the big hairy biker come into this?

I went round, done the deed and then she tried to sucker me in with the guilt trip...

Not happening again...

[Itchy]

Urgh controlling and horrible , break out be free,

or if you are inclined in that way , go back shag her senseless then break up ,

NOTE , pyscho GFs can be nuts in a post shag break up , she might say you raped her , which = a whole world of sh*ite , hence part 2 is dangerous

[Zimbo]

I'd take the casual sex, and take her back if you think it'll work, but make it clear that it's conditional upon you being allowed a life, including seeing your mate and doing things on the bike. Do not negotiate over this point, let her win and you're screwed forever.

[Dazbo666]

If she's likely to continue with the guilt trips or emotional blackmail, I'd say cut your losses and drop her for good right now.

If you still want to take her back, make sure it's on YOUR terms, cos if you allow her to dictate to you from the beginning, it's only gonna get worse in the long run.
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1st bike (Sept'06 - May'10) : 1991 GPZ500S / Current bike (since Nov 2009) : 2003 Suzuki Bandit 600N
Word of the day : DILLIGAF

[carlnicholson...]

Make it PERFECTLY clear that she will ALWAYS come second best to your bike.

Sounds a bit harsh, but if it is clear, then she has nothing to come back on.

With regards to the casual sex, just nail her as frequently as you feel the need to.

If she wants to get back, then do, but don't let her think that you will put her before your bike.

I got engaged at 18. I gave up flying, and a few years later, I gave up my career as an aircraft engineer in the RAF. She very nearly started to take the piss when she realised that I would do anything for her. That was until I got my bike, and I told her if she made me choose, then she wouldn't like the outcome. Give a bird an inch she will take the whole fucking lot. Make the situation clear, and she won't take the risk.

She realised and we are now getting married in July after a 5 year engagement.

Good Luck.
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"THOSE WHO RISK NOTHING, DO NOTHING, ACHIEVE NOTHING, BECOME NOTHING."

[colin1]

It could be shes wants you back and you can have it all on your terms.
Sounds tempting.

It could be she is just a bit lonely and horny and fancies a shag. Might end up a bit wierd but could be quite handy for when you are a bit lonely or horny too. Or if she is desperate, get her to pay you for sex


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colin1 is officially faster than god

[Shaun]

Colin as someone who recently got dumped I don't think you should be posting in threads about relationship advice.

[ash t]

Shaun, like you have a right to talk about relationships


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When You're Starting To Choke, Take Some Pills With Your Coke, Its Hyserical

[Shaun]

I aren't offering any advice or opinion on the matter, besides me and you are doing just fine.

[ash t]

Erm, Back on topic now!
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When You're Starting To Choke, Take Some Pills With Your Coke, Its Hyserical

[colin1]

[ash t]

U cnt bt a bt of csual sx!
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When You're Starting To Choke, Take Some Pills With Your Coke, Its Hyserical

[Flip]

My life got turned upside down last night when meaningless sex was meaningless. What do you do when sluts no longer have a purpose??

Gutted.

Flip.

[BanditBitch]

[cyprinis]

I think I fancy a bit of time just havin fun. gonna stay well away from her, and go out with mates as much as I can!

And spend some time alone with the bike...

Cheers guys, I needed that.

Tom

[Katie]

What is it about this particular friend that she has a problem with?

Does she worry about you being on a bike or is it just down to jealousy of the time you spend with your friend/friends?

Hard to comment without knowing those answers really ...
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Never have a row with an Idiot, they drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.

[binge]

Would not get with a lass who tries to stop me seeing me buddies!

Ive got a mate who has a girlfriend who threatens to dump him whenever he is out with mates.
Its pathetic


id go round for the casual sex though, Fuck her up the arse, Spit on her back when you are about to come. She turns round thinking you have already cum.
Then shoot your load in her face.

Drink your Tea.


And go home.
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- Honda XL125S - CBR400 NC29 - VFR400 NC30 - CBR400 NC29 - TL1000R - TeeZeR Pit! - Bandit 12 - YZF450 - LuckyMX125 Pit! - Demon X XLR 140 Pit!
- Stomp KZ 160 Pit! - Demon X D-link 140 Pit! - CRF50F Mini-Pit - MonsterMoto 155cc MiniSM - Honda Chaly 150cc - Yamaha 98' R1
- Honda Chaly 140cc - Thumpstar 190cc 4v MiniSM - Aprilia RS125 Pit-Bike -

[cyprinis]

she doesn't like this particular friend because it was him who got me interested in bikes.

But it's not like he held a gun to my head and made me buy one, even though she'd like to think that.
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636 A1P, and lovin every second of it!

[mrchips]

Don't let a girl try and take your hobbies or mates away from you, no matter how good a shag she might be.
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Northern Irish? www.nibikers.com

[xlizx]

I agree with Katie, maybe she feels jealous and wants to spend more time with you than actually hating bikes? There could be a simple underlying problem which is the root of all this.
Just tell her biking is a huge part of your life, and while you assumedly want her ot be part of your life too, she'll have to accept the way you are. Maybe she's just worried you'll get hurt or something? If you really want to save it, you could always try going to Relate or something, and working it out.
But relationships are about compromise, and if she isn't willing to, then give her the boot.
But do the Spiderman first!

[xlizx]

I agree with Katie, maybe she feels jealous and wants to spend more time with you than actually hating bikes? There could be a simple underlying problem which is the root of all this.
Just tell her biking is a huge part of your life, and while you assumedly want her ot be part of your life too, she'll have to accept the way you are. Maybe she's just worried you'll get hurt or something? If you really want to save it, you could always try going to Relate or something, and working it out.
But relationships are about compromise, and if she isn't willing to, then give her the boot.
But do the Spiderman first!