General Public's Weirdo's

[Skunkcap Freddie]

Ok, on short i work in a computer shop, and you get your day to day knob heads who think they know everything, argue there bit out. come back next day apologise. but thats not what i'm on about today.

Every so often there's this old man who's dressed in womans clothes and a wig and there's somthing wrong with his leg (know knowen as bendy leg by everyone after i nicknamed him) comes in without a doubt you know its a old man. Everytime i see him heading for the door i leg it behind the scenes out of the way even tho i'm branch supervisor i can't help but find this funny. fair enough this guy might feel better like this but i find it amusing and don't want to talk to him as i can never look him in the eyes.

just wondering if anyone else gets people comin into their place of work that are generally not classified as norm ??

(not actually making fun at this guy in this post but was a general enquiry, as i'm sittin bored in work and at the moment no sign of him. eyes peeled tho)

[Marcg868]

Not similar really, but theres always one person who works for Speedy hire who delivers Scaffold Towers etc etc to us sometimes. And i just refuse to speak to him, get one of the other lads to help him. He makes me feel sick smelling of B.O, i just find it disgusting, smells of B.O, has awful breath and a cant help but gag when i used to speak to him.

No excuse smell of B.O, there's things in our homes called showers n baths, and also deodrant. Work with loads of scaffolders and we sweat alot but we dont stink.
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JACK, MISS YOU LOADS YOU LEGEND.

[Kram]

Got a few.

When i worked in £-stretcher we had 2 regulars. One was an old man, always came in and bout a mug and 16 paracetomol. (every day ) And always piad the right money.

Second one: We heard it walking around (high heels) so i thought we better make a move to the till,, when it came up to the till it had huge boobs, long blonde hair, and a gootie and a mans face and had a voice like barry white.

At my new job, one of our members use to be in a mental home, and comes in and every step he takes he moves his head left to right (so we call him tick tock) and he talks to himself, and drew a picture of our chairman with an axe in her head
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FS1E -> SR125 -> CB400N -> CB650 -> FZR600 Genises -> VFR400 NC21 -> CBR900RR Fireblade -> Renault Clio 1.4

[Skunkcap Freddie]

lol, yea always get smelly bastids coming into the shop. there's 1 particular guy that smells of pee. lol i went and spend about 10quid on air wick one that kills smells and masks them aswell, everytime he leaves out with a can in each hand lol, dirty git.

[numark1]

A couple of gay teachers but thats it.

[Villers]

I was in the police station yesterday to sort out my producer I got (my own fault for crashing ) and some guy came in wearing full camo gear (including hat), he had headphones on (huge ones) and sunglasses. He put a plastic bag down on the desk and shouted 'Excuse me mate (to me), can you tell the woman this is for detective pringle, I cant stay here Im undercover'. Off he went. Weirdo!
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RS125 > CBR6 > SV650S > ZX636R > GSX1300RZ Hayabusa > 06 RSVR Mille > SV1000S > Street Triple 765 RS

[Sadie]

Was in Superdrug yesterday and a man in his late 50s/early 60s came in.

He obviously had some kind of learning difficulties and he also didn't appear to be able to make any sound when he spoke, so he just mouthed the words.

He is obviously a "regular" in the shop, although I suspect he is not a customer.

He had popped in yesterday because he had noticed that there was a new member of staff and he wanted to say hello.

I was most impressed and pleasantly surprised at the attitude of the staff. They all took the time to talk to him, introduced him to the new girl and told him to have a good weekend. There was no effort to hurry him out of the shop, no-one was impatient (either staff or customers) and he went off happy.
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With experience comes age.

[Kwaks]

Other side of the counter this one, i regularly go into my local computer shop for any bits and pieces and just to keep up to date with developments. Well there is this guy in there who always looked a bit shifty,could never look me in the eye,well any way I don't know if this guy fancies me or thinks he knows me from somewhere but it has got to the stage that he runs and hides in the back shop everytime I go in. Well any way I found out he is a supervisor,so I'm gonnae have it out with him next time I go in as I have to return some faulty kit anyway, and if I see him running through the back I'll just embaress him in front of his workmates by shouting out "where you hiding Honey,I saw you when I came In"

[Flip]

[Mister James]

Genius Flip!

You owe me a new pair of boxers - I think I've just pissed in these ones!
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>Soultrader Mister James, I bet you are a copper
>Bazza Wow. Eyes like a shithouse rat, you...

[Skunkcap Freddie]

[Flip]

[The View Askew]

[anders]

[LustyLew]

I can remember I worked in Sainburys for 3 months as a checkout manager. Once a week we'd get a visit from the carers of the local home for the mentally disabled *. Now I have nothing against these guys, my mum teaches children with all kinds of disabilities and really, they cannot help it, and they are undoubtedly more happy in their world than I am in mine! But it's really tough when you're trying to help them pack their bags and you've got one screaming their heads off because they can't have a barbie comic. One of the trainee managers used to run off when they came in, I gave him a right bollocking and made him pack their bags three weeks in a row...

That's why I only lasted 3 months!
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Like a Yorkie - I'm not for the girls

[Skunkcap Freddie]

hahah, 3 months . They must of loved you

[Katie]

I get alot of guys coming in to work asking about make up. It's really difficult to advise if you don't know who it's for. I never know whether to ask "Um .. is it for you ... or?" incase I offend them.

Have quite a few weirdo regulars in Debenhams.

An old scottish drunk who always asks me if he can have a bag for whatever it is he's carrying on the day, last week it was spanner and an air pump. He then squirts all my (female) perfumes on himself, and walks round doing them same on every counter.

A guy of about 60 who seems completely normal apart from the fact that he always has a baby's dummy in his mouth.

And probably the worst .... a guy who always has the same grey tracksuit bottoms on, with something very large stuffed down them that reaches his knee (it just cant be his thing). And a very suspicious large, wet patch where the err .. 'thing' ends.
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Never have a row with an Idiot, they drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.

[veeeffarr]

Wasn't what kwacker wrote deliberate? (Hence the emoticons at the end of the post )

When I worked in the bakery at Safeways East Grinstead (Many many moons ago) we used to have someone come in that looked EXACTLY like patrick moore, and he'd come up to the counter and go "THREE, WHITE, CRRRRRRRRRUSTY ROLLS PLEASE!". He was a proper dude, always came in in designer shorts and raybans... Almost pissed myself everytime he asked for those rolls tho... bless.

[Luke_Retrofly]

Hi
Theres a guy at our work who comes in we call him "the dribbler", we walks to the counter and as soon as he opens his mouth a flow of gob comes out runs down all over him, onto the front of the counter onto the fall, it makes you heave, he dosnt even try and stop.

Thank god we dont have to clean it up, as its "bodily fluid" contract cleaners have to do it .

Not nice though whenever we see him we always leg it and the poor sod who didnt see him comming has to server, gutted .

Luke
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Flounced - Long overdue
Fuck you bitch I'm in the top 10 list I can do the what the fuck I want!

[Skunkcap Freddie]

lol, free for all to get out the door into the back. lol

lol, least i'm not alone on this one

one of my work buddys said there's bendy legs on saturday, i almost fell over the radiator to get away. wasn't even bloody there

[Luke_Retrofly]

loooooool


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Flounced - Long overdue
Fuck you bitch I'm in the top 10 list I can do the what the fuck I want!

[McGee]

Never had a problem although we did lead a homeless guy down a canal with pennies ..... no we were not going to kill him

I used to like being pushed around in a wheel chair in sainsburys or tesco and acting like a tard sainsburys has a hit put out on me
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Its pronounced Jixxer!

[Skunkcap Freddie]

[Pete]

I know a guy who broke his ankle when he fell off his push bike. He told me he was hit by a car. I got the full story out of him - he rode into the back of a parked car! (God knows how he managred to break an ankle though!)
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One fine day in the middle of the night, two dead men got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other!

[Johnny GSX-R]

I see them all in my work.

We have a regular who complains on a daily basis but we have to respond.
This particular day she called us saying the kids had bricked her windows, she said,

"I heard the glass go with a right smash, all my upstairs windows have gone in"

I arrived to see ALL the windows in the house were actually made of polycarbonate and had been so for a number of months.
I asked her to describe the offenders to which she replied,

"Oh i can't remember it was years ago, thought i'd let you know though".














We also had a guy piss in the back of one of our vans, we could hear him doing it and when we looked through the bulkhead window it was flowing up and down on the floor as the van moved.
We advised the custody office so we could get the cleaners on hand for when we arrived, however, when i opened the back doors there wasn't one drop to be seen , i got hold of this guy by his arm to lead him into the charge office and his jumper was saturated......................dirty TWAT had cleaned it off the floor by mopping it up with his jumper.