Childish Revenge or Legitimate Action?

[TheDonUK]

Every day when some idiot in a car nearly knocks me off (especially the scream your head off at the driver then cool off by the side of the road ones...) i always wonder what the best possible way of extracting the perfect revenge on them would be...?

It would almost be classical conditioning, make the idiot associate something bad with the negative action (almost killing a biker), and then they wont want to do the negative action again in fear of something bad happening... Or at worst they would at least take their eyes off the satnav/phone/dvd/ugly family for .5 of a second and glance in a mirror. (this is excluding the real assholes who look you in the eye then pull straight onto you). For them... well a punch in the face is in order.

Hold on a Minute!, i hear you ask. What kind of "something bad" could i do to them without involving the law... A punch in the face through a smashed window is so cliche, we demand a new-improved K6 method of revenge with shiny things and big red buttons.

Paintstripper in a mini water pistol, sprayed on the car incognito or overtly?

key the back of the car, or if they really fucked up, the bonnet while screaming obscenities?

The old tried and tested boot to the wingmirror?

These are but a few ideas, lets hear yours. Extra brownie points for the more imaginative ones.

P.S... Yes we could take the high moral road and indeed the highway code as an example, but if you are that kind of person just suspend your better judgement for a minute and come and play

[phk6]

childish revenge all the way
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Current .. 2008 BMW R 1200 GS Adventure ..
Before .. 2003 Yamaha Fazer 1000 .. 2004 Kawazaki Z1000 .. 2003 Suzuki Sv1000s .. 1999 zx6r Track Bike .. 1999 CB 500 Cup ..
/Phil

[STONEY!]

I had this with a taxi he cut me up twice so i over took him whilst he was stuck in traffic put my bike on its stand infront of his car got off and went to open his door damned central locking beat me lol so just shouted at him throught the window til it looked like he was about to burst into tears then got back on my bike and rode off

[TheDonUK]

That sounds familiar

Am i the only one that gets really bad road rage when someone nearly takes me off... i mean spitting like a mad dog bad...

I have thought of another, Sharpen the hardened knuckles on your gloves to points (or you could go down the kinky route...) somehow and run that down the side of the car... that would be available instantly for those opportunity moments

[Barney]

I never get angry at the idiots who decide to cut me up etc, I don't even sound the horn, just get on with my riding.

Guess I'm just a positive type of rider, is that normal?

[TheDonUK]

Yea i would imagine you are in the majority Barney.

I gotta stick up for mah minority bruthas

[bazza]

1/4lb of steel nuts/bolts/washers in an old footie sock FTW.

Handy pocket sized package.
Smallish, but hard to fix bodywork dents.
Useful <cough> anti-personnel </cough> qualities if cager decides to mix it up.
Handy for opening windows/windscreens.

(You'm ent seen me, roight?)
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"That's it. You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college."
'98 Ducati 750SS, '08 Suzuki GSX650F ©2004-2014, Bazza's Harmless Banter

[Rookie]

The ones that really piss me off are mobile phone users. On my way back from Andys, I was going a fair old speed, and had to slow down for someone in the 3rd lane. Keep in mind, this was a pretty empty motorway. Not one to undertake, I sat behind them, but then saw they were swerving all over the place, one time almost hitting the barrier. No way I was getting too close to a drunk driver, so I dropped right back.

Eventually they pulled over to the 2nd lane, and it was some woman, still yacking away on her phone. I was absolutely livid; that she was so caught up with her phonecall, she didn't notice the headlights in her mirrors, or the two lanes of empty carriageway next to her. I wanted to give her door a proper kicking down. Luckily for her, I was frozen solid from the waist down, and my legs probably wouldn't have allowed it.

[TheDonUK]

hmmm... nuts and bolts in a sock... yea, you could have the "handle" end hanging out in an easy to reach place, and if questioned by the piggies, you could tell them how vibey your bike is and that it is inclined to loosen nuts and bolts...

Dont even get me started on mobile phone idiots... A couple of weeks ago on the A40 Westbound just before hangar lane (by the Cinema/Shell garage), The left and centre lanes were horribly backed up... naturally i filtered past all the drivers see a white POS... civic or sunny or something stoped, in the left lane, no hazards, I pull up and tap on the window to ask if they need help... a stunned woman looks up from her phone says no, starts the car (and i must stress this it started perfectly, nothing was wrong with that car.. apart from the driver) and drives off... Stupid bitch had blocked the A40 up to text someone.... goddamn, i just wanted to kick her door off...

[wisebeuy]

If I get cut in front by a car, or if a car pulls out from a junction far too close, i go ABSOLUTELY RAVING. The number of times I've scared the s**t out of my pillion rider for swearing at the car that've just tried to kill me.

I agree with and love the paintstripper in water pistol idea, he won't know what uv done till he gets home... then its too late!

[WavyGravy]

Jump in the back of their car

Dial 999

When they arrive - tell them youve hurt your back

https://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=4613207988&
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1975 CB125s, 1991 GN250, 1990 Ducati Paso 906
"Don't wake him up - He's got insomnia - He's trying to sleep it off"

[Irezumi aka Reuben]

Pulling a stupid face or laugh at them for a little bit. Then suddenly stop and give a dead-pan face. Then kick their car.

I do this on my pushbike and they consider me slightly demented, seem's to work though.
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Pictorgraphicalfantastical

[TheDonUK]

Lol @ deadpan face

RE: Paintstripper in waterpistol, it was just an idea, would it be dooable or would it melt the plastic?

[Nb]

It wouldnt be too hard to rig up a brake fluid spraying system on the front of your bike using a washer pump from a car.
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Colin1 wrote 'Im grateful for what i can get, which isnt all that much.'
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[Rookie]

[divuk83]

Just paint a rude word onto the side/back of the car with some nitromors. I reckon that would work pretty well.

Dave

[kawakid]

White van did it to me on outside of motorway yesterday, just started moving in. What can I do but shout at him , he mouthed sorry.

It depends on the person, i'm not going to start a fight with a women or with a bloke with kids in his car.

Saying all this, the most serious near misses i've had (ie full on emergency stop) i've been the most calm.

When i've anticipated the idiot in advance or guessed the fool would do something stupid, I tend to get more annoyed and aggressive.

Sometimes we can be annoying though, I recently came flying round a corner and found a car turning, I blared my horn etcc.... Thing is if i'd payed more attention, there was warning signs saying there was a junction...
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I've a twin and a 4.

[The Wobbly Orange]

Take their numberplate and find the car and ignite some thermite on the bonnet. That is likeley to cause serious damage.
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People tell me I am lovely. How wrong they are!

[MarkJ]

It's not my idea, but you could try opening a passenger door

Or how about pulling a windscreen wiper up, spin the blade 180deg. so the metal top will hit the windscreen if it falls, then either leave it and watch them panic, or just smash it back down onto the windscreen leaving a nice chip

[MarkJ]

[Andrewc2oo5zx...]

follow em home, sit tight for a bit, then when nobodys looking, drop a big turd on the drive way and smear it on the door handles to the house and under the door handles on the car, pooh under the finger nails is gunna piss anyone off especially when it aint ya own
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SUNDERLAND AFC

[TheDonUK]

[fredsredhat]

[quote="MarkJ"]It's not my idea, but you could try opening a passenger door

Or how about pulling a windscreen wiper up, spin the blade 180deg. so the metal top will hit the windscreen if it falls, then either leave it and watch them panic, or just smash it back down onto the windscreen leaving a nice chip [/quote]
thats the best thing ive ever heard!! will keep that one in mind

[GearboxGeezer]

Always wanted to punch some1s mirror off, But I havnt so far and I have taken alot of shit from other drivers. I gess I just dont like the thought that they could ram me and kill me, is it worth it?

[Itchy]

the problem is not doing anything positively encourages reckless driving as they think they can get away with it and eventually is becomes the norm.
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