Drinking experiences

[Rookie]

What's the best/worst/most eventful night out you've ever had?

Last night it was my sixth forms leavers' do, so we threw on the dinner jackets and went off to a local pub/restaurant place. We were in a function room, decked out with the cheesy disco, horrendous fake chandeliers, and party sized sausage rolls. Deciding to steer clear of all those, we headed straight for the bar and spent most the night drinking them out of stock.

Now we'd had a quick get together beforehand, and I'd already had 4 cans of cider, so I was relatively pissed already. We arrived at 7.30pm, and it was straight onto the Strongbow interspersed with John Smiths. At about 10pm, and after 6 or 7 pints, I'm pretty hammered, stumbling about a lot, and decide to take a lonesome walk around outside. Here it comes.

Had a proper old fashioned spewing session in the car park, sat down for a bit, then felt OK to go back in. Sit down on a sofa; OK, maybe not. Dash back outside still retching into my hands, and next thing I know I'm sitting against a wall on the gravel, throwing up and then moving to the left to get away from the copious amount of sick. At this point I got sick on the shoulder of my DJ, so that'll have to be dry cleaned.

I ended up falling asleep lying down, people kept stopping and either asking if I was OK, or laughing at me. My literature teacher thought it was hilarious to pretend I was a homeless person, and gave me 10p.

At this point I must point out I certainly wasn't the worst person there; I didn't get violent with the bouncer or require any assistance getting outside, nor did I vomit in the toilets or rip a urinal off the wall.

Anyway, after lying there (apparently half in a pool of my own vomit, I haven't a clue) for about half an hour, I went and sat on a wall with it pissing it down heavily. After eventually getting up and going inside, I sat back down on my favourite sofa with a glass of water. Now the ex-girlfriend decides it's a perfect time to get a bit cuddly; clearly she'd had too much to drink as well. I quickly despatched her; telling her she definitely didn't want to kiss me, considering how my mouth was doing, seemed to do the trick. I then fell asleep, apparently in a very strange position, completely dead to the world. I'm told I was slapped in the face by one of my friends, but I didn't feel a thing and didn't wake up.

Next thing I know, the barman is waking me up and telling me they're clearing out for the night. So I go and stand in the lobby, and watch various people fighting with the bouncer; I think it may have been to do with someone getting their todger out on the dance floor.

Getting outside again really did the trick, and I sobered up a fair bit (still off my face, but not as bad as I had been). Perfect timing really, as our taxi arrived and I was able to converse with the taxi driver without spraying him with puke.

Now it gets a bit messy hereon in. We go back to a friends house, and God knows why, but he's up for more drinking. It was about 1am, and I wanted to crawl into bed and die. But instead I'm roped into a vodka drinking session, in which 5 of us polished off an entire 1 litre bottle. Much vomiting ensued, not all by me, and I wasn't as bad as I could have been, passing on some rounds, and getting more down my shirt than in my mouth most the time.

Then it was back down the road to my house, and I had to set up the futon for the 2 staying over before crawling into bed, only stopping to take my socks off, and falling dead to the world.

Good night!

Let's hear some of your pissed up times.

[tony532]

drinking 40 pounds worth of spirits at the bar with my mate one after the other.

i apparently danced with a christmas tree,tried to get out of the doors using the locked one for 5 minutes.

had to be carried out of the car into the house and i kept telling people to not bang my trainers against the door.

i then fell off the settee giving myself a nice cut above the eye.

and asked my friends girlfriend for anal sex

i have no memory of this at all

i woke up in bed with just my trousers on, and one trainer.
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[mr jamez]

Went to a pub and had some cider, beers and a shot from the shot girl (purple turtle shot girl ). Everything was cool, went to a club and drank a horrible amount of disgusting vodka.

Anyway, ended up in the middle of Reading crying at the taxi rank

Mind you, didn't pay for any of my drinks.
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NSR 125F > BROS 400 > NC30 > BROS 400 > Trumpet S4 > '97 VFR 750

[JonB]

Probably at a fancy dress party where yes, I was dressed as a woman

Well to go with the appropriate attire I gave myself a large bottle of sweet Martini for the night and swiftly downed it in about an hour.

Remember walking into the toilets and interupting two people kissing and taking a piss inbetween them, followed by copious amounts of vomit.

Then went for a wander down to the local reservoir, by myself, in the freezing cold, in February in a short skirt and little top. Ended up having many people ringing panicing about my disappearance, only for me to come back, say Hi, puke up and fall asleep.

What a good night.
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Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it?s worth.

[Flip]

Apart from the DJ's and vomiting this all sounds pretty standard.

[Sephiroth]

They have all been awfully bad (but yet good) experiences.

Two of them which come to mind (or, other people telling me).


My mate's birthday last year, group of friends went round his house on a bus from town. Me, him and his girlfriend were the first ones there so I decided to start drinking since they were all flirty and what-not.

That was at half 5.

An hour later everyone arrives, and by this point I had about 4 cans of stella and some sort of orange juice that was in the fridge.

Probably about 8pmish.

My mate's girlfriend had always liked me, so me and her were in the kitchen and she starts flirting with me.

Now I was a bit pissed to flirt back but I wouldn't of done anything with her even if I were sober-ish (not with him there anyway ).

So she hands me her bottle of jack daniels and tells me to drink it, so I did.

After drinking the bottle, she walked out after giving me a hug, I didn't feel too grand at this point and decided having a drink of water was best.

Turned the tap on and what's this? Oh right it's vomit coming out of my mouth, onto all my mate's dishes.

I eventually had a big glass of water (I hadn't eaten since breakfast either) and stumbled into the living room (no one else was pissed yet) and fell face first onto the leather sofa, vomiting over everyone's bags.


I woke up at 1:30ish, AM, sitting outside against the wall, with a saucepan between my legs full of watery spew. My clothes were drenched too.

Decided to go get changed in some spare clothes I left there and noticed everyone else was sleeping! At a houseparty!

EVERYONE ELSE HAD BEDS!

I slept on the floor with the cat, it was a cold vinyl covered floor.

[MarkJ]

We got shit-faced, then me and a mate pulled two 6-foot planks off a fence and had a sword fight with them. Funny as fuck at the time

[veeeffarr]

I got my drink spiked and jumped about 15 steps and landed cocixx first into a doorframe.

Woke up in the morning and couldn't move my legs.

[mr jamez]

[Sephiroth]

Fuck off....

[Barney]

I once woke up on a grass verge by a bus stop with people waiting there. I had blood all over my hands and shirt. I'm still paranoid as I thought I may have murdered someone.

Till this day I still havn't the slightest clue where it came from.

[ram_doom]

I had a rather odd night out a while back, went to watch a band play then hit the bar strip (not strip bar) um then got very wasted fell asleep on a stool at the bar then got dragged by friends to more pubs etc and I chased swans for a while down by the river then got picked up and on the way home was vomiting out the car door then fell out and landed in the um, puke Top quality stuff !

I hear on good authority that seph gets men to buy him cocktails... er ew friggin lesbo
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TL1000s, KDX200

[xlizx]

Me and Chriss got trashed last week and carried home an armchair which we left outside my front gate, no one could get in or out without moving the bastard.
Once got so sick that I picke dup bits of my mates puke with bare hands because i was too ratarsed to care

[superstacker]

Where do i begin?

Just spent six weeks with the RAF out in northern ireland, and decided that as soon as i got back i was going to arrange a proper night out for my 21st birthday.

so me and my brother arranged a joint 18/21st birthday trip to nottingham, complete with Partybus tour (basically you pay 20 odd quid and you get taken to various clubs and get in free)

I only managed to drag three people to this do and i thought it was gonna be a crap night. However we then found out that we were the only three blokes on this bus, and there were 48 other birds

So the vodka and coke starts, maybe about three or four, and we get onto this bus. The girls startbeing funny with us, as we have gatecrashed three hen nights pretty much.

First bar (after startpoint): Apple sours and more vodka, we get chatting to some of the more friendly girls and they welcome us into the group

Secondbar: on the way, on the bus we are feeling more merry and decide to get up and dance Inside the bar after more drink we end up dancing with this girls in moves that could only be described as dirty dancing!

Third bar: Bit of a blur, but i finally cop off with one of the girls and to this day i cant remember her name, but i remember chatting total bollox to her.

Now so far this is pretty standard stuff i admit, but this is where the night made itself.

One the way to the last club and i am hammered, the music on this bus is really loud and some stripping type song comes on "hot stuff" i think it was....

I look around on the bottom deck and wheres my brother? Ah he must be upstairs, i stumble up these stairs to find him doing some kind of topless shuffle on the top deck.

Not to be outdone by my younger bro, i push him aside and whip off my top and throw it at this 20 or so birds. I then undo my trousers and drop them, leaving my boxers on......

I didnt count on the girl behind me pulling them down though.....cue 20 open mouthed girls staring at me naked at the front of this bus.

I get my trousers back on, but cant find my shirt, none of the girls had it, and i really started panicking. turned out they had hung it out the window as a joke and the thing had fallen down!

Luckily the bus organiser leant me his work top which i promptly wore for the rest of that night

[superstacker]

double post

[McGee]

The college I went to was about a 3 min walk through a park to a pub and at lunch we would go play pool. This went on threw the first week then on week 2 I thought bollox Im a big lad I can handle my drink.

So 4 pints of JS extra smooth later im feeling fine so, a bit of jd and then some tequila then it hit im properly f*cked.

After noshing on some chips and cheese one of our mates bought so we could have free pool I thought I was sober enough to walk back to college for the lesson with the guy who had the gammy left arm.

I took one step out the door and bang flat on my face and I thought I was still falling and had clinged on to the ground According to my mate I was screaming for a bit till I realised I was only laying down.

I honestly thought I was falling for ages you know that feeling you get.

Well after that little escapade and many people staring I got up and made my in a snake path to the entrance to the park where they had these 4 foot high bollards. Another one of those im drunk I can take on the world moment ensued as I tried to leap frog over it. I made it to the top and landed flat on my gooch on it. Which didnt hurt until I started to slip to the left and eventually hit the ground.

I made it to the campus after being persuaded I better not go on the jungle gym. I got into lesson unhindered and sat down in the wheely style office chairs the computer room had.

I then for a reason unknown to me began to say the most random phrases in german ever.

Like

Mien Halbess Henchen tut wher hast du eine slabe for das (sorry cant remember exact spelling)

But translated it read My half a chicken hurts do you have a cream for that.

Also threw in a bit of beef curtains and cock knocker in german.

I thought I was being loud enough for just my mates to hear as I turned to see the whole class looking at me I was like



I apologised and started to work. Suprisingly made it threw the lesson although the only thing I manged was the date and my name.

After lesson we went back to the park I then decided to shout something along the lines of, Yippe Kai Yay Mother F*ckers! As I run up the slide.

And thats the only stuff I remember. Since then I have never drunk before or during school.
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Its pronounced Jixxer!

[stinkwheel]

Any time I have drunk Absinthe I have a highly eventful night. Unfortunately, I have no memory of any of them.

Was pissed last night with a couple of mates. Walking home past the local primary school and noticed they had a sign on their railings reading "Science fair. 21st 22nd 23rd of May" but done as individual letters tied to the railings with string.

After a bit of standing and looking in a 'countdown conundrum' kind of way, we eventually came up with the following (by dint of using some of the signs flipped round to make extra/different letters):

"Faeces Nipple may I"
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“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.”
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.

[Reevo8]

Always get told about these never remember them.

I went to a young lady freinds 16 in december. Being 18 and that she isnt hot I didnt do much more than drink. Her hot mate who came round had heard I liked her but was only 15 at the time. We got to talking and me and 2 mates tried some Viagra for a laugh. Cue much whipping out of my hardon and redfacedness.

Then I got onto the Turbo shandy's, now these things are moreish. After 4/5 I was wanting more and slurring. Next thing I knew I was in my bed at 8am with blood around my nose and chewing gum still in my mouth.

I kopped off with the beautiful 15 year old and was play fighting with a mate when she kicked me in the nose. Blood everywhere and me laughing shouting and waving bloody fingers in peoples faces. Turns out I was drunk sick everywhere outside of the party venue, and when I was taken home fell asleep while knelt down.

Other stories include me waking up to be told I had pissed up against a bar while ordering a drink.
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05 ZX10R, (**05 WKR)

[DAF]

Got picked up off the pavement and detained at Marylebone nick "for my own safety" after a particularly heavy session many years ago. It was after a rum and coke drinking competition with the local pub landlord although, unbeknown to me at the time, he was loading my glass with triples and only putting coke in his own - the cheating sod. Custody seargant was a right patronising git, which in turn got me a bit stroppy though I'm usually a very happy drunk. Kept pressing the bell button in the cell until they eventually disconnected it, much to my annoyance at the time. Eventually got some kip in on the rubber mattress and they booted me out at 6am after a bit of a lecture although even then my attitude was still pretty much "talk to the hand". Counted myself lucky for not being done for D&D
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2005 Yam Fazer (FZ6-S)