Any dads on here?

[michael j]

In 9 weeks I'm gonna be taking delivery of a new baby boy/girl. The thing is, although people are forever telling me its the best thing in the world, I'm just not that excited about it. The pregnancy was planned but happened alot quicker than I thought it would ( I kinda thought it would take at least a year) Is it normal to be so un-enthusiastic? I'm pretty worried about the extra financial burden and responsibility but I think we'll probably be ok. Is this a normal bloke indifference thing or do you think I've got issues?
Thoughts please
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Ducati 996

[Whosthedaddy]

People always say that when the little nipper grabs your finger for the 1st time is when it all suddenly sinks in that your the daddy, But I did nt feel like this at all It took me a while to really bond with our son.

Its not unusual to feel like this, I did to some extent when our son was born 2 1/2 years ago.

For the first couple of weeks the novelty of the the baby gets you very excited, but soon the reality hits and my god did I say some absolutely horrible things to him when he just would'nt stop crying, and the missus is in tears. The safest thing to do is; place him in the cot, close the door and walk away for 5 minutes, make a cup of tea and kick the dog

No one can actually afford to have children, but its amazing that you can always find money for them, it usually means that you go without .

Hope everything goes well
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Current : MSX 125 Past : CBR 900RR Monkeybike : c50 LAC : ZXR750 H2 : FZR600 : ZX7R P3 : YW100 : TRX850: Trophy 900 T309 : GSXR 600 L0: Monkeybike : XJ6S Whosthedaddy

[msgander]

Nope I would not call it unenthusastic, just that you are being realistic, shame more women dont do that!

Sadly most people concentrate on the rose tinted specs version before they even consider having kids, then when sprog comes along, its major life adjustment.

You will bond, you wont have any problems there but its good to feel a bit more realistic, wont do you any harm at all.

Once it arrives I guarantee you will be smitten, life changing they are but whilst I am not the worlds most maternal mum, I wouldnt be without mine, they can drive you nuts but they also come with many laughs and many moments of pride.

Its a whole new world tho! - no haynes manual unfortunately!!

Good luck
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Always believe that your guardian angel flies a bit faster than you...............

[whackamole]

One thing I would like to say is that when you don't have kids and you're in sainsburys watching the mum and dads running around after their kids n stuff you're like WTF!!
As soon as you have them yourself though you realise its not just having a kid. It's having you're kid!!
In a world where everything has a price tag and everything is packaged for one selfish need after a nother one thing kids give you is this...
PURE GOLD.
and for free (well...you know what I mean!)
The first moment you see your little one raz around on their bike or get excited at just the sight of you or as said before ... grabbing your finger..... or one of many millions of other things you will undertand.
Remember you chose them though and not the other way round. When they're driving you nuts remember, you are the adult and they are the child and you understand even though they may not. If they're playing up and you've had a bad day at work that's not their fault. They don't understand what a 12 hour shift is like, so don't take it personally.
You'll be fine, all the best and mind how you go
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Be nice.

CBR600F

[colin1]

i have a mate who's wife wanted to have a kid but he wasnt fussed. He now loves the kid loads more than his wife, and wd probably leave his wife if it wasnt for the kid.

Im sure you will also love your kid more than anything else you have ever loved before.
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colin1 is officially faster than god

[michael j]

Sticky, there is a Haynes manual for babies. It was one of the first things I bought when I found out Amanda was pregnant

Thanks for all the input, I still feel a bit of a freak tho. Like you say, I'm sure that will all change when I first meet the screaming shit machine in about 9 weeks time
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Ducati 996

[shellshock]

https://www.jojomamanbebe.co.uk/cgibin/priamlnk.cgi?CNO=1&MP=ITM^GIN200&CODE=ST17108&SPCAT=IF&CAT=JCT61&TYPE=P&SHOP=

Although you won't honestly need one !

Agree with all the others here, once you hold your baby all will become apparent - and if it doesn't, it will in time. Just make sure you get lots of hands on, changing, burping, bathing, etc, all these things help the bonding experience.

I'm having my third baby in a few months and still haven't quite worked out how I really feel. With my first born it was love at first site, but with my second I gave birth and thought 'yeah, its a girl, whatever'. But I absolutely adore her now.

Financially you'll be ok, its a case of having to be. I found adjusting to having to fit a little one into your life the hardest bit.

Good luck anyhows.

[NSR Mick]

My daughter is now 1 and I wouldnt change having her for the world. We were quite lucky though as she has slept right through since she was 4 months old and is a very happy and placid baby that only cries if theres something wrong otherwise she'll crack a smile for anyone.

https://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a50/micklivesey/bethany/DSC00692.jpg
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If you dont like the way that I ride.......Stop trying to keep up!!!

[Zimbo]

Best thing that ever happened to me.
I wasn't all that fussed before the event, but it certainly changes your life, and you, for the better.
Don't worry about it, things will work out and you'll manage. Financially you'll cope, you'll do without some things you take for granted now, but you won't mind. Look back in a year or 18 months time and you won't believe you ever felt this way.
It's not something you can communicate to a non parent, you need to experience it for yourself, but you won't regret being a dad!

[ZRX61]

They fall asleep quite rapidly in a moving car, so don't be surprised to find yourself taking the kid for a tour of the neighbourhood at 3am....

[Whosthedaddy]

[andrea]

Im obviously not a daddy, but i am a mom, and i can honestly say that i wasn't excited about our first at all. I was only 19 when we found out i was expecting, and i almost had an abortion. Then we decided we'd try to manage...but for the rest of the pregnancy i remember thinking that if something happened and i lost him, maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing...

Callum is 5yrs old now, and i have a daughter aged 2 aswell. It was a struggle but we got by. All the hard work is truly rewarded when they first say mummy or daddy, or tell you that they love you. Apparently its not so good when they reach their tenage years!

You'll be fine, and you'l grow to love him/her.

Hope that helps

Andrea

[TOM M]

Id be shit scared if i was ever due to have any, i know id be completly useless.
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Now owner of a 1200 Bandit

[Dazbo666]

Well my son was, shall we say an unplanned surprise, and getting used to the prospect of being a dad took me quite a while.
To be honest I was coping with the responsibilities of helping to look after him, probably for a number of months before I really felt that paternal bond. And during that time I really was wondering if there was something wrong with me too... But I can assure you that it will develop into something that only a parent can understand.

Not sure if all this makes much sense now that I'm reading thru it, but basically now I could never imagine life without him
https://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e312/Dazbo666/JTS%20MCycles%2008042006/DSC00192.jpg
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1st bike (Sept'06 - May'10) : 1991 GPZ500S / Current bike (since Nov 2009) : 2003 Suzuki Bandit 600N
Word of the day : DILLIGAF

[ash t]

Wahoo congratulations !!!

My son should have been born on the 31st of May, so every day I am biting my nails expecting every phone call to be my girlfriend telling me to come home.

I cant wait for him to come out now, I just hope I can do a good job of being a dad!
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When You're Starting To Choke, Take Some Pills With Your Coke, Its Hyserical

[quacker_boy]

I'd be up for babysitting in the summer Michael, (this is gonna sound wrong) but i really love little kids, it's so much fun just holding the little thing in your arms and everything about them is so small, unfortunately, when they grow up to be my age, apparently they're a handful

Good luck mate
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wizzzard wrote: Imagine God just stopping by, tidying your front room up and then quietly letting himself out again. Statisticly more likely to happen than Korn being on here.

[bazza]

Kids?

The first ten years are the worst.

The next ten are the worst, too.


(Apologies to D.A.)

(No, not Shaggy)
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"That's it. You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college."
'98 Ducati 750SS, '08 Suzuki GSX650F ©2004-2014, Bazza's Harmless Banter

[Krakatoa]

Hi all, my first post too.

I have twin boys. And i can honestly say now(they are 10)i wouldn`t want life without them. However, it took some time for me to bond to them. They stole my social life, my money and my wifes figure(got that one back though ). I`m only saying this because this is how i felt at the time.

It will change however, the things they do that show you they are little people, like the giggles, and the words, the expressions and so many other small things that make a persons character special.

Just take each day as it comes
And the car tip works.

[tribal_tiger]

[ash t]

We tried both the curry and the other bit lasnight, and he still hasnt moved or anything.

I think he might be the son of the devil, and is waiting until tomorrow to come out
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When You're Starting To Choke, Take Some Pills With Your Coke, Its Hyserical

[michael j]

Ash T, Have you thought of any names yet, like Damien for example?
Thanks again to everyone for the input.
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Ducati 996

[TOM M]

[ash t]

[TOM M]

[VTR SP1]

I found that as the kids get older and you can interact with them more you enjoy them more.

Here is my 2 year old son.
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I rode the Nurburgring backwards.