Self Esteem/Confidence

[MementoMori]

What kind of things do you do to build and maintain it?
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The tiger who came for a pint

[TL666]

Drink.

When I drink i'm the funniest, best looking, cleverest and hardest person in the world.

[byke95]

Depends on severity of the problem i.e. lack of self-esteem.

It may be that all it takes is some positive experiences with some friends/family or a good old fashioned holiday.

If the problem is more severe it would need a more structure approach, something which would be difficult to give over an internet forum. With the internet there are plenty of people saying they can 'fix' whatever is wrong, sadly this is not the case.

If this is for yourself and you are 'feeling the pinch' lately, just try and take a step back and reflect, there are usually a lot of things to be positive about in life, it's just that sometimes the bad stuff 'clouds' us. If it something more severe I'd suggest approaching someone you know and trust.

[killa]

Money problems got me down for bit quite a lot, my self esteem is crushed by that shit because I like to do well and I often do.
But then I realised it was my own fault for getting into the mess for one, secondly the problem aint that bad when compared to some dummy’s, and I don’t know anyone (unless given handouts and/or inheritance money) that don’t struggle for cash.
I thought for awhile my GF was looking elsewhere, but then it was my own attitude that was affecting the relationship, so I sorted that.
Some of my close friends have done things that have confirmed a lot of my doubts that I’m doing badly by doing worse.
Harsh it might sound but it does perk me up because they've slipped up.

I got my looks, my girlfriend, my health and most of the things I want in life.
And I don’t stop reminding myself of it, which helps a lot, it might not seem like it does, but trust me, its better than beating yourself up mentally trying to achieve the ultimate goals that only the people who have it handed to them on a plate can reach.

Take a look at what you’re doing, take each part of your life and tweak it a little bit, like a bike.
Eventually unless you develop too many problems for yourself, you’ve got a well oiled machine that rarely need’s a service.
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Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.
Bike:- Yamaha TRX850 | Killas Biking History | Killas Gaming History | Killas autmotive history

[lozzypop1]

Hey memento!

I know how you feel, I turned 29 in January and having had kids very early, sometimes feel like I've done nothing with my time.
I have days/weeks where my life just feels stagnant and it seems that everyone is so much more sorted than I am!
What I decided was that before I hit the big 30 I was going to do a lot of the things that I had wanted to do as a kid! They don't have to be big things, it could be something as simple as dying my hair bright pink for example!

You may be so busy, or feel so badly about yourself, that you spend little or no time doing things you enjoy--things like playing a musical instrument, dor riding your bike. Make a list of things you enjoy doing. Then do something from that list every day. Add to the list anything new that you discover you enjoy doing, and anything that you've always wanted to have a go at!
Me, I'm going canoeing for the first time ever next month!

Another good idea is get cracking with something that you've been dreading doing, or something you haven't even thought of, like clearing out under your bed, or sorting through the bills you've been ignoring. This will build your self esteem tremendously. (honest)

Learn something new! You don't need a reason to do it... only that you have an interest!
There's loads you can do but one of the main things to remember is not to dwell on your problems, but concentrate on what you can do to get it sorted! What advice would you give your best mate if he/she was to tell you his/her dilemmas? And remember... take some of your own advice!

HTH
Loz
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Funny, I used to hate being spanked as a child!
Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.

[JonB]

It's no surprise you have low self esteem, you are part of the ever suffering female population.
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Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it?s worth.

[Flip]

I don't need to build my confidence because I'm invincible.

[Itchy]

go racing , while filtering ,

don't give a fuck about what anybody else thinks,

stop using other peoples yardsticks are an indication of my own.
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Spain 2008France 2007Big one 2009 We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will. In the end, your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it is worth watching.

[lozzypop1]

[TheShaggyDA]

Where's me bucket?
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Current: CB500 Previous: CB100N, CB250RS, XJ900F, GT550, GPZ750R/1000RX, AJS M16, R100RT, Enfield Bullet

[i:6e3bfc7581]But still I fear and still I dare not laugh at the madman...[/i:6e3bfc7581]

[msgander]

Get out and have fun.....if you are feeling crap its probably because you have too much time to think about it. I get days like this but its usually a combination of tiredness, grotty child and other stuff!

Bring out the sunshine, grandma is babysitting and works gone ok and the world always looks brighter!
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Always believe that your guardian angel flies a bit faster than you...............

[king kong]

Just wait for the mid-life crisis to kick in

[McGee]

I keep my helmet on
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Its pronounced Jixxer!

[Dragonfly]

having suffered and still suffering frmo low self esteem and occasional no confidence i turned into a bitch! oh yes. i have been to the piont where i hated myself and had no self esteem or even dignity thanks to an abusive ex so i know what no self esteem is. confidence i couldnt speak or look people in the eye. now adays yuo start on me and io will lok you in the eye and rip you to pieces! i developed anger probs though since the self esteem and confidence came back

but i built mine up by starting to like myself basically, may sound big headed but you have to start there. confidence comes with it. when you faced with something difficult chin up! dont let it get you! stare it in the face, you maye be scared but dont show it. people will respect you more for speaking up. i got walked over to many times in the past and have learned my lesson big time in life.

when someone tries to step on you, you be bigger and step on them!
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All the breast.
Muzza on Binge:
He's too busy beating the everloving shit out of Lizzie to notice this thread has taken a turn down Drama Avenue and stopped off at the popcorn shop.

[senna_f4]

[Mary Jane]

well, havng your boyfriend tell you he doesn't trust you or respect you and never will becuase of things you did 11 years before you met him surely doesn't help.

[colin1]

[colin1]

motorbikes are excellent for building and maintaining confidence

just go out for a blast on the bike
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colin1 is officially faster than god

[McGee]

Yes and when you get off it and are all sweaty and covered in bugs and smell like exhaust go and test your confidence then
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Its pronounced Jixxer!

[dainesefreak]

[bindy]

Hello,

Go and get your hair done. Save some money and go on a holiday. Exercise! even if you just do a bit it makes me feel better anyway. Do karate or something. Although I cant talk because I have been meaning to do a martial art and Im too scared to go because of a fear of looking like a retard.

[innominate]

I just accepted that I am eccentric and damn cool for it.


Fuck the rest of you (if needs be)



Its either that or try and fit in and be a boring sheep like every one else.
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I, as a responsible adult human being, will never concede the power to anyone to regulate my choice of what I put into my body, or where I go with my mind. From the skin inwards is my jurisdiction, is it not? I choose what may or may not cross that border. Here I am the customs agent. I am the coast-guard. I am the sole legal and spiritual government of this territory, and only the laws I choose to enact within myself are applicable.

[tribal_tiger]

I beat up small children and old people.

It makes me feel big and manly
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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?

All of it.

[MementoMori]

Thankyou for your replies, especially for posting your experiences in such a personal thread.

Sounds rediculous that someone like me should have any real problems. I'm 18 for god's sake, I don't have to put up with adult life yet which I imagine can be a burden.

Alot of things have gone wrong over the past two years within my erm... 'social network' and now that I'm finally out of college I've had a chance to sit back and look at my life and it was a bit of a slap in the face to see how bad things are.

There's also a lot of things that I want to do, like move out and go to Uni and go on holiday which aren't gonna happen because we're emmigrating in October and that's largely controlling how I'm spending my time atm, sorting out 18 years' worth of crap and redecorating the house.

I try and turn things around and think positively but I can't. Every time I try and think a good thing about something, myself especially I feel like a twat for doing it and then loads of negative thoughts come flooding in.

Argh. Life atm is gay.
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The tiger who came for a pint

[MementoMori]

I'm going out in 20 minutes to see my BF and his mates.

I'm absolutely shitting myself, my heart's going, my legs are wobbly and I feel like I'm about to throw up.

I've known these people for 2 years, some I've grown up with.

WTF is up with me?


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The tiger who came for a pint