Whats mine is yours.......

[Scouse]

Certain things I have seen and read on the internet recently have got me thinking. I noticed a post earlier where someone mentioned a pet that used to be there's. Now I know from a very close source that this pet wasn't in fact the person who claimed it to have been. I have also noticed before as well that pictures of bikes that belonged to an ex-partner are being shown as own belongings once upon a time.

Basically I just wondered what peoples views are on sharing and claiming ownership of belongings with their partners/ex's. Where does the line draw on who owns or 'who's is' say an animal or motorbike etc.

[EllioTT_GiXXeR]

If i pay for it, then its fecking mine
____________________
www.gixerjunkies.net www.gixerjunkies.net www.gixerjunkies.net www.gixerjunkies.net

[_Will_]

[Scouse]

Yeah I'd agree with that.
Although some things are bought to share, I bought my bike for instance as my bike but to share, I'd never expect my other half to claim it as hers though. That would be like her buying a new skirt and me going to work saying it was mine.

[JodieWodie]

My pets are mine
My car is mine
My bike is mine

Basically..anything that has an emotional attachment is mine

I include bike, car in this cos ..I do
So there
I don't give a sh*t about house, belongings, etc...
My kid and pets are the foremost things I would think about

Jo xxx
____________________
Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow"

[Scouse]

Exactly, so why should an ex partner or current partner claim possesions as theirs? I would never class anything my other half has bought to be mine. Nor would I class any of my ex's possesions etc to be mine. I bought my other half a dog and because I bought it for her I don't like it when she even classes it as ours let alone mine.

I just find it wierd how people can claim things as theirs when they aren't/weren't, and can't understand why someone would do that. Is it just simply because they don't feel they have anything to talk/show off about to others of their own?

[colin1]

if my ex leaves items in my house which she doesnt want or cant take away, they become mine

unfortunately my kitchen is way too small to plumb in that dishwasher that sits in my living room

she wanted the cats, she couldnt take them to the flat she got when she moved out, they are now my cats

money she paid as rent got squandered on motorbikes rather than doing up the house, but they are still my motorbikes even if her money paid for a bit of them
____________________
colin1 is officially faster than god

[Scouse]

What would you do if her money paid for all of them?

[Phoenix]

Assuming I know what you're referring to, but in the instance of something that was bought equally, ie. a bike. If it is later sold, then I believe both parties have a right to say it was their bike.

And as for emotional attachment making it yours, how does that work when you're both emotionally attached to something? You go out tomorrow and buy a cat, you and your partner live with it and care for it. IMO it's not YOUR cat, you both have a right to say it's your cat.

But moreso, why the fuck does it matter? Seems more like pedantic nitpicking than an actual deeply concerning issue.

[Scouse]

Ok then lets say you assume a little further......say the cat or bike/s was/weren't bought even close to equally. More like one partner went and bought them on their own with their own money.

Does that mean that the geeperz is yours? or the dogs? that sarah has? hmmm

Perhaps it is just perdantic nitpicking or maybe even moral correctness. Either way I don't remember saying that it was a deeply concerning issue.

[Phoenix]

No it doesn't and it was daft to make such a comment as neither the bike is mine, I didn't buy it, nor do I ride it. The dogs I didn't buy and nor do I look after them. This is about shared ownership/care of things, anything else is pretty obvious And it's obviously an issue or you wouldn't have deemed it worthy of a post asking everyones opinion.

[colin1]

[Shaun]

https://aging.als.uiuc.edu/2002%2007%2001%206.GerardDurand%20fishing%20@%20Cedar%20Springs,%20VA.jpg

[Dragonfly]

[Vic]

Whats mine is mine, and whats his is mine

Only kidding!! We do have things that are ours, but most things are either mine or his. Think it comes from him moving in with me, and i'd already got a home set up. Think if we'd done it together, then it'd be shared. But saying that, i would never feel the need to claim "ownership" over things we have, unless the time ever came when we parted.
____________________
www.thefuelrooms.co.uk

[yambabe]

Depends on your relationship and your point of view I suppose.

Me and Himself have been together a long time, and stuff like the bikes I do tend to refer to as "ours", without really thinking about who bought them or who rides them the most (or ever!) So does he.

Same with the pets. If you were to apply strict tests I suppose they would qualify as "mine", but we are both involved with their day-to-day care and both live in the same house with them so we both refer to them as "ours".

Should we split up, I really can't see that anything would change. I would still regard the stuff either of us had during the relationship as "ours", particularly stuff that we had when living together.

I suspect that if I was feeling a little hormonal and insecure I might want to kick up a fuss should he be saying stuff was "his" rather than "ours" though. That may be a woman thing.......
____________________
Sod falling in love, I wanna fall in chocolate.

[Scouse]

I love how people are jumping in. Making presumptions that I'm having a dig at someone else when I've just made a general topic on a subject that pops up every now and then and used a certain person for some examples, without even mentioning any names.


https://www.outdoorsdirectory.com/akpages/lemire/images/new_photo5.jpg

[Clanger]

Really depends on your relationship really, and how much material goods mean to you.
____________________
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[lozzypop1]

But Who's relationship is it anyhow????

Does it matter who puts more effort into it to have the right to claim it as YOURS???
When a couple goes out for the evening, Who's night is it? HIS or HERS?

Fact of the matter is that yes ok, when you're 18/19 living at home with the parents and having a relationship, maybe you CAN divide things into mine/yours.

What about when you are 30 (for example) what then?
Living together, Joint bank accounts, Joint bills... all pretty quickly puts it into perspective.
My Ex husband had a fireblade.... Because of this I had to pay more into the joint account (as it was split right in half for ALL bills) So in effect, I paid Half... Now I never once rode it as I don't ride... and when I left him, I didnt expect to,
a) Take a chainsaw and take half.
b) Sell it and get half the money.

Ok so my Name wasn't on the Log book, But were I to take it to court and produce the bank statements for that Joint account I would more than likely be able to force him to sell it AND take half.
Now you tell me that the bike wasn't mine. (In some weird way that I HAD worked out before I started typing)

____________________
Funny, I used to hate being spanked as a child!
Tell me and I'll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I'll understand.

[zaknafien]

That's why you don't have joint bank accounts or get married for that matter.

Unless of course you like being shafted(obviously not in every case) when the lust wears off and boredom sets in.
____________________
02 Firestorm.

[Jesus_Christ]

Am i alone in having stuff that's not my, and my missus's. We just have stuff that's our's

The bike was always mine as I rode it, but that's the only reason, it's our house, our pets, our money.

I find it odd that I've friends who have been together for years and still treat money as "mine and yours". Wth us it's just whatever card is to hand, or who has the most money at the time. I'd set up a joint account if I could be bothered getting off my fat arse.

What sort of length relationships are you guys thinking of here?
____________________
If you ate Stephen Hawking, would that count as one of your "five a day" portions?

[V twin eater]

I agree with Jesus.

My missus and I have been married for almost 30 years now and everything is classed as ours.

The way I think of it is independent of who bough it out of whos money and it doesn't matter who earns the most money.

In a way I look at it as: We are a team, I couldn't of payed the mortgage, payed the bills, food ect on my own wage and the same applies to my other half. I may earn more but wouldn't have a lot of the stuff I own and couldn't of survived if she wasn't there to help contribute and the same applies to her.

My busa is mine but we both payed for it. It was bough for me to use but it is still ours. The same applies for the car she uses for work and the car I use for work.

Everything is ours, we just both use different things more than the other.
____________________
---> Hyabusa 1300
---> Intruder 1400
SOON ---> Intruder M1800R

[shellshock]

To give this whole thing a bit of closure, and for me to vent my spleen once and for all, yes the relationship refers to myself and distortion, who went out for less than a year, during which I bought myself two bikes, one of which was stolen and never recovered, the other I sold to finance my move back home. You can find pictures of my zxr on his bike sites, or used to be able to. JP used them both, without insurance and has constantly referred to them as his bikes, and never missed an opportunity to tell people how he pillioned me about everywhere, mainly because he liked to question my ability, maybe a valid point, who knows.

My cat, well JP had nothing to do with him really, he didn't look after him, never shelling out cash for food or litter, so yes, I object when he puts up pictures of him and refers to him as 'my old cat'.

Whilst I am being all hormonal and stuff, he also never once during that year paid for the weekly shop or any bills, and even now refuses to give me back some items that belonged to me way way before I met him.

Shortly after we broke up he put up a thread on here 'some things you should know about shellshock', which I didn't enter into, because I basically couldn't be arsed. His now best friend kindly hacked into his computer so that some naughty pics of myself could be deleted when JP refused to do so. Again maybe my own fault for being a little bit naive and trusting.

So why am I writing all this and making myself look like an attention whore, who the hell knows. I haven't looked at BCF for a number of weeks, and it has just really annoyed me that when I do, I find the little runt is still upto his own tricks. Oh and that BCF is unfortunately still one big clique.

I recall Shaun saying at some point in the past that it is very easy to get people thrown out of the clique, just by making them uneasy. Its a shame that some people just see bike forums as a way of getting 'one up' on other people. Myself and Scouse used to be part of the clique, but as you can see what happens is that when you make a post about another member, they all jump on board like little lemmings, most not knowing or caring about the true facts. Why the hell is it boring Bella ? I happen to find most of what you and Jon write boring and extremely pompous. And never ever argue with Pho - hes always always right.

So, basically I can't be bothered with the whole BCF shit anymore, its left an extremely bitter taste in my nasty northern mouth. When I think back on the BBQ (oh that I paid for) and all the beer and hospitality most evenings that was freely given, it makes me sick.

So for any newbies that could be bothered getting this far, watch your back and never trust any of the Midlands clique in particular. Goes without saying I won't be back.

So good ridance to myself - there I saved you saying it.

Oh and to you people, JP, Shaun, Bella, Suzuki, Flip, Pho, Realninja, Nighteyes (sorry if I've missed anyone out) CONGRATULATIONS - you have won.

(PS - This isn't Scouses opinion)

[zaknafien]

Someone took the toy's and lobbed them clear over the garden fence I see.
____________________
02 Firestorm.

[colin1]

gosh, that midland clique sound like an intimidating lot, we shd all best avoid em then but i think they are happy with their own company so leave em to it i guess. Not sure all of them are as close as suggested by that post but guess I wdnt really know.

Well my last rship didnt have a great ending, but that one sounds worse. I always like to hear about others having it worse than me as it makes my life seem better.

nice little rant. i enjoyed it even if i found it a little unsettling

does this mean that if i have bought tyres off a member of this dastardly criminal gang I have been overly trusting ?

I hope not.
____________________
colin1 is officially faster than god