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Anton
Nitrous Nuisance



Joined: 19 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: 11:31 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Just a thought. Reply with quote

Have you ever noticed that we can say the stupidest stuff to each other and think we are amusing. My favourite this week, or maybe my least favorite is the idiot who will come up to you and say “ Is it cold enough for you?” I mean your standing there shivering so hard you're afraid parts of your body are gonna fall off and some arsehole wants to know if your cold enough. “ No stupid, I thought I’d get naked, hose my self down and sit on a block of ice.” Well at least that’s what you want to say. And the worst part is they think they are witty, like you never heard that one before. And you know what’s even worse they want you to respond in a like manner. I say there ought to be a law where we can just knock the crap out of them. Rolling Eyes
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Weedy
World Chat Champion



Joined: 16 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: 11:33 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

*Walks into doorframe*


"OOOOOH mind your head!"



Shocked Middle Finger Laughing
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killa
Won't Shut Up



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
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PostPosted: 11:51 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

You come into work on the bike, and they say "Is it raining?" and it is.

Or "Are you wet?"

Um, Fuck off.... Neutral Middle Finger
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samharcus
Nitrous Nuisance



Joined: 15 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: 11:52 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

I was once in Edinburgh with a friend, and we needed to find a payphone.. I found one, and pointed it out. Do you know what I said?

"Look, there! Toll booth!"

Don't ask me where I managed to get "toll booth" and "phone booth" confused, I have no idea Embarassed

Sam
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pa_broon74
World Chat Champion



Joined: 28 Mar 2006
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PostPosted: 12:03 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

There was an old guy in our local we used to know, he'd ask if you wanted a drink. I'd say "No, I'm fine thanks." He'd reply with; "I wasn't enquiring after your health, I was asking if you'd like a drink."

That got really old really quickly...

Stating the obvious as an excuse to fill a pregnant silence. I make a conscious effort not to do this. I.e. You see some one with loads of shopping bags - you say; "Been Shopping?" or you see someone eating their dinner - You say; "having your dinner?"

Oh aye: anyone who says: "It's not rocket science" Grrr!! Evil or Very Mad

Very Happy
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Weedy
World Chat Champion



Joined: 16 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: 12:06 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

*Phone rings*

"Oh who's that ringing now!?"

I don't freaking know, answer the phone and find out!!
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samharcus
Nitrous Nuisance



Joined: 15 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: 12:22 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

pa_broon74 wrote:
There was an old guy in our local we used to know, he'd ask if you wanted a drink. I'd say "No, I'm fine thanks." He'd reply with; "I wasn't enquiring after your health, I was asking if you'd like a drink."


I've both said that, and been told it. I'm ashamed at how old I seem Wink

Oh dear. I was going to put the usual Sam at the end of my post, but no more... I'm stuck for what to do, now!
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Mr.Everready
World Chat Champion



Joined: 28 Mar 2003
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PostPosted: 12:25 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

samharcus wrote:


Oh dear. I was going to put the usual Sam at the end of my post, but no more... I'm stuck for what to do, now!


Put it in your sig instead. Thumbs Up Wink
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samharcus
Nitrous Nuisance



Joined: 15 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: 12:33 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

I had considered that Very Happy Not sure, really. It's not life-threatening, I hope.

*lack of end name*

"aargh! I'm dying" Nooooooooooooooo!!!!

Sorry, couldn't resist Razz
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TheShaggyDA
Repost Police



Joined: 14 Jun 2004
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PostPosted: 13:19 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

pa_broon74 wrote:
Oh aye: anyone who says: "It's not rocket science"


Just ignore them, it's not rocket science.
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[i:6e3bfc7581]But still I fear and still I dare not laugh at the madman...[/i:6e3bfc7581]
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Finglonga
World Chat Champion



Joined: 27 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 13:21 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

"Oh....Your here then?".........No shit Sherlock!
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Villers
World Chat Champion



Joined: 13 Sep 2004
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PostPosted: 22:24 - 28 Feb 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

'Did you get home alright?' No im still lost in the wilderness or dead.

'On the bike mate?' full race suit and helmet - no I just dont trust the bus driver anymore

someone rings the house phone 'where you at?'

Dogs barking 'what you want' 'actually I was thinking you could watch me do that arse skidding thing on the back garden if you fancy' - he's not going to answer is he?!

God theres loads!
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palmer
Fiddled Kiddy



Joined: 21 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 08:12 - 01 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

Villers wrote:

Dogs barking 'what you want' 'actually I was thinking you could watch me do that arse skidding thing on the back garden if you fancy' - he's not going to answer is he?!


ours do, just not by speaking...
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Walloper
Super Spammer



Joined: 24 Feb 2005
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PostPosted: 20:01 - 01 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

Assistance: "Can you not remember where you 'LOST" it?" Shocked

Wisdom: "Another inch and that would have had your eye out!"
Oh would it have smart arse? An inch the other way and it would have missed me ya prick!
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ram_doom
World Chat Champion



Joined: 25 Mar 2006
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PostPosted: 20:06 - 01 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

"It always turns up in the last place you look"
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McGee
O RLY?



Joined: 24 Jun 2005
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PostPosted: 20:22 - 01 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

"Where's my key's ?"

"On the side"

*Looks around; there are like 12 sides*

Crying or Very sad
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Its pronounced Jixxer!
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Weedy
World Chat Champion



Joined: 16 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: 20:38 - 01 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

McGee wrote:
"Where's my key's ?"

"On the side"

*Looks around; there are like 12 sides*

Crying or Very sad


Wink Lee Evans Wink Laughing
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Dazbo666
World Chat Champion



Joined: 06 Jun 2004
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PostPosted: 21:28 - 01 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

This thread has gotta be the best laugh I've had for ages!!

almost literally PMSL Laughing
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Word of the day : DILLIGAF
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st3v3
Super Spammer



Joined: 16 Oct 2006
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PostPosted: 22:57 - 01 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

*walk up to someone,

*ask "what ya doin?"

*(you think or reply) WTF does it look like? Rolling Eyes
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Harold_Shand
World Chat Champion



Joined: 07 Jun 2004
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PostPosted: 10:34 - 02 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

I slept with someone.

It's called SEX.
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Harold_Shand's theory might be the best explanation.
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killa
Won't Shut Up



Joined: 18 Oct 2004
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PostPosted: 12:22 - 02 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

You trip, stumble, hit your head on something..

*Rubbing really fast*

“Ahhhh, fuck……aah, shit, ffff”


“You alright?”


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You hand someone a cuppa and they go straight for the taste, scolding their mouths.

“Aaaw, that’s hot!”


Well yeah, it’s boiling water.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Bike:- Yamaha TRX850 | Killas Biking History | Killas Gaming History | Killas autmotive history
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2Smoke
Crazy Courier



Joined: 15 Apr 2005
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PostPosted: 12:26 - 02 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lying in the road having had a head on with a car, bouncing off the windscreen, going over the roof and off the other side.

Guy gets out;

"You alright mate?"

Me;

"Fantastic, never felt better thanks.... " Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes
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SimonB
Brolly Dolly



Joined: 23 Sep 2005
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PostPosted: 12:27 - 02 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

A friend of ours used to ring up and say

"Are you in?"

I think so I mean I have just answered the phone in my house.
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stinkwheel
Bovine Proctologist



Joined: 12 Jul 2004
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PostPosted: 13:18 - 02 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

I always say "That'll be the phone." when the phone rings in someone elses house. I just do it to annoy them.

Anyway, it's only small talk, you got to do it. I'll have exactly the same conversation half a dozen times today, it's just being polite and getting things moving. Today it's:

Fine day.

Aye, better than yesterday.

Yeah, bloody freezing yesterday.

Aye. There was a hard frost this morning first thing.

Well, it is still March I suppose, it's to be expected.

Supposed to rain in the afternoon though.

Better than snow. Good job we're doing this now, no fun doing an outside job in the rain.

Then you get down to work.
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Gpz 900R
Nova Slayer



Joined: 26 Jan 2007
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PostPosted: 13:44 - 02 Mar 2007    Post subject: Reply with quote

Broken down in a motor - What's wrong with it ?

UH ! especially from some twat with no mechanical knowledge. Evil or Very Mad
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Old Thread Alert!

The last post was made 19 years, 8 days ago. Instead of replying here, would creating a new thread be more useful?
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