Adaptations of "He who dies with the most toys, wins.&q

[booyah]

7th Day Adventist - He who plays with his toys on Saturday, loses.
Agnosticism - It is not possible to know whether toys make a bit of difference.
Amish - Toys with batteries are surely a sin.
Anarchist - We can play with anyone's toys we want, whenever we want for as long as we want.
Anglican - They were our toys first.
Atheist - There is no toy maker.
Baptist - Once played, always played.
Baha'i - All toys are just fine with us.
Branch Davidian - He who dies playing with the biggest toys, wins.
Calvinism - He who dies with the most toys was eternally predestined to win.
Catholicism - He who denies himself the most toys, wins.
Church of Christ Scientist - We are the toys.
Church of Christ - He whose toys make music, loses.
Communism - Everyone gets the same number of toys, and you go straight to hell if we catch you selling yours.
Confucianism - Once a toy is dipped in the water, it is no longer dry.
Democrat - My brother is bigger than your brother and he says you have to let me play with you.
Evolutionism - The toys made themselves.
Existentialism - Toys are a figment of your imagination.
Greek Orthodox - No, they were OURS first.
Hari Krishna - He who plays with the most toys, wins.
Hedonism - To heck with the rule book!? Let's play!
Hinduism - He who plays with bags of plastic farm animals, loses.
Jehovah's Witnesses - He who sells the most toys door-to-door, wins.
Libertarian - No one is going to tell me what I can and can't do with my toys.
Mormonism - Every boy can have as many toys as he wants.
New Age - Go stand in front of your mirror and contemplate your inner toy.
Non-denominationalism - We don't care where the toys came from, let's just play with them.
Pentecostalism - He whose toys can talk in unintelligible languages, wins.
Pantheism - All toys are interrelated or There are no toys--everything is sacred
Polytheism - There are many toy makers.
Republican - Let the kids keep their toys.
Satanist - I'm going to smash all your toys.
Socialist - My mom says you have to share that toy with me.
Taoism - The doll is as important as the dumptruck.
Theosophy - All toys came from the original One Toy.
Unitarian Universalist - I respect your toy even if you disrespect mine.
Voodoo - Let me borrow that doll for a second.
Wiccan - Let us breath in harmony with our Toys.

[Ariel Badger]

Confucianism - Once a toy is dipped in the water, it is no longer dry.
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[MarJay]