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How to Annoy Mobile Phone Users

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Visitor Q
$25 whore



Joined: 30 Apr 2004
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PostPosted: 17:00 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Has anyone thought of buying one of them 6mm bb electric uzis... Fill with 6mm paintballs or indeed normal bb's if you cant be arsed to risk it jamming/not popping on contact.
Traffic lights with normal cockish cage driver on phone etc, take gun out of pocket, safety off, *spray* all over their windows/car etc.
Should also work rather well backwards, reasonable to the side (at low speeds) but not too smart an idea forwards.

p.s. if you dont want to get done for firearms offences paint the gun yellow with pretty colours on it or something.

that OR i believe in the anarchists cookbook they say you can stick a spark plug through the end of your exhaust and hook it up to the alternator etc, alledgedly lights the emissions. I dunno, might work Neutral
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mchaggis
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PostPosted: 17:17 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

bonny_ricardo wrote:

i believe in the anarchists cookbook they say you can stick a spark plug through the end of your exhaust and hook it up to the alternator etc, alledgedly lights the emissions. I dunno, might work Neutral


This depends on how rich your engine is running. I'm not sure how rich most motorcycles run, but cars certainly run lean so as to minimise the unburnt hydrocarbons. Yank cars are notorious for running rich mixtures, (it's little wonder to see why their mpg is so poor) which would let them make homegrown flame throwers.

Having said all that, seeing as the bore tends to be much larger than the stroke on a bike, and seeing as they run so fast, there might be a lot of unburnt fuel thrown out the back of a bike which would let you do this. You could always use the choke I guess.. Smile

I just wish my course focussed on anything more than cages and trucks..
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Visitor Q
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PostPosted: 17:23 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

mchaggis wrote:
bonny_ricardo wrote:

i believe in the anarchists cookbook they say you can stick a spark plug through the end of your exhaust and hook it up to the alternator etc, alledgedly lights the emissions. I dunno, might work Neutral


This depends on how rich your engine is running. I'm not sure how rich most motorcycles run, but cars certainly run lean so as to minimise the unburnt hydrocarbons. Yank cars are notorious for running rich mixtures, (it's little wonder to see why their mpg is so poor) which would let them make homegrown flame throwers.

Having said all that, seeing as the bore tends to be much larger than the stroke on a bike, and seeing as they run so fast, there might be a lot of unburnt fuel thrown out the back of a bike which would let you do this. You could always use the choke I guess.. Smile

I just wish my course focussed on anything more than cages and trucks..


I just thought how much fun would that be, cane past a car that pissed you off, slow down (or generally people tailgating)... flick switch WHOOSH barbeque their front bumper, tyres, front plate, grill, possibly overheat their rad etc. Just would amuse me Twisted Evil
But stil the bb gun would be cool too... or how small do automatic/semi automatic paintball guns come... cos i KNOW you get small bb guns that could do it, whereas paintball guns tend to have huuuuge gas reserves and ammo hoppers Sad
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Milo
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PostPosted: 17:29 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

bonny_ricardo wrote:
or how small do automatic/semi automatic paintball guns come... cos i KNOW you get small bb guns that could do it, whereas paintball guns tend to have huuuuge gas reserves and ammo hoppers

Just have a pipe coming off your exhaust that you can route towards the handlebars...strait into the back of your weapon of choice.
Still...I'd prefer it if I could somehow make my crossbow semi-auto Twisted Evil

Adam
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Kickstart
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PostPosted: 18:25 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

headlamp wrote:
.....because the lights change, he's got one hand on the wheel and is not concentrating & continues his journey deep in conversation.


Or just drops the phone. Could easily have been a 2 second call at an appropriate time to say "stuck in traffic". After all would you appreciate a car deliberately squirting you with their washer jets and then telling you that they only did it because you had an illegal visor on?

headlamp wrote:
I have noticed that most drivers meander all over the road when they are on the phone. If you are filtering when someone has a meander then it is a heart stopping moment & if you swerve into a car coming the other way, then possibly your heart stops permanently!


Not really. They are the ones you notice. You probably do not notice the majority who are on the phone because they do nothing to attract any attention to themselves. Those who do wander about can be done for driving without due care and attention which would be far more appropriate and would not have required any new laws.

mchaggis wrote:
This depends on how rich your engine is running. I'm not sure how rich most motorcycles run, but cars certainly run lean so as to minimise the unburnt hydrocarbons. Yank cars are notorious for running rich mixtures, (it's little wonder to see why their mpg is so poor) which would let them make homegrown flame throwers.


Suspect most American cars run very lean with few hydocarbons in the exhaust, at least after the catalytic converter. They have had very tight controls on exhaust emisions for about 20 years longer longer than the UK. One reason that US cars appear to have far worse fuel consumption is that the US gallon is smaller than an imperial gallon (3.6 litres as opposed to 4.5 litres). Cars in the USA are restricted by the Corporate Average Fuel Economy laws which penalise car makers for producing cars doing under a certain amount to the gallon on average (and the level is quite tough). Trouble is that SUVs are classed as trucks and so exempt from CAFE rules (which is one reason they are so popular, as they do not have to have all sorts of nasty methods to try and improve the fuel economy).

mchaggis wrote:
Having said all that, seeing as the bore tends to be much larger than the stroke on a bike, and seeing as they run so fast, there might be a lot of unburnt fuel thrown out the back of a bike which would let you do this. You could always use the choke I guess.. Smile


Bikes run a fair amount richer than cars. Bike emisions are terrible (with a 2 stroke moped producing about as much nasties out of the exhaust per mile travelled as a diesel bus). After all most bikes use the crude and nasty way of making power by revving the nuts off the engine to burn as much fuel as possible, and to hell with the combustion chamber shape.

All the best

Keith
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Frost
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PostPosted: 19:47 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ive found that ideots who talk on phones whilst driving have been replaced by a new menace.
Those who stop their car, turn off the engine and answer the phone. allthough this is the right thing to do, some do it in the most STUPID of places! i nearly went up the back end of a car yesterday because some woman had stopped on the exit of a blind bend to have what looked to be a girly chat.

i fear some people have no common sense and will never learn :<
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badlydamaged
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PostPosted: 20:16 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

You can ignite the exhaust on 2 strokes, did it with a lighter with severall strokers when idling with full choke and all obliged with a nice bluey yellow flame! My KH100 is the best for it out of what we tried, can get a foot flame out the back, and stays lit for about 10 seconds when idling (goes out as soon as you rev it though, guess gas flow is too fast to sustain it from the origenal burn) although if you had a "flamer kit" (basically a spark plug in the exhaust) I guess it should work at any rpm with even bigger flames Evil or Very Mad . It would certanly dispense with the tail hugging cages that hassle us from time to time, well it sure made a mess off some sapplings we tried it on Mad . Doesn't seem to work with the 4 strokes we tried though. Crying or Very sad
Just thought i'd mention that, im off to go and burn some more wildlife, Twisted Evil
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headlamp
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PostPosted: 22:25 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kickstart wrote:
Quote:
Or just drops the phone.

Unlike the guy at Chiswick roundabout who at the lights merrily continued his conversation round the most dangerous & busiest roundabout in all of Christendom!

Kickstart wrote
Quote:
You probably do not notice the majority who are on the phone because they do nothing to attract any attention to themselves.

Until they decide to pull into the lane you are in and you have to swerve to avoid them like this evening at Hanger Lane!

I hear what you are saying but the fact is, maybe in London in particular, people are not attentive when they are using their mobiles! The legislation is not being enforced, car drivers are endangering lives while using phones and we as bikers are more than likely to bear the brunt as we travel 'differently' on the road to cars.

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Kickstart
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PostPosted: 23:26 - 26 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hi

I know what you mean, but although plenty cannot drive with a phone in there ear (having seen someone on the M6 doing about 35 straddling the 1st and 2nd lanes), but plenty can and there were already laws in place that could have been used.

Likely the only ones who will be done under the new laws are those that are an easy nick, such as people parked but with the engine still running.

All the best

Keith
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headlamp
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PostPosted: 09:54 - 27 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Likely the only ones who will be done under the new laws are those that are an easy nick, such as people parked but with the engine still running.


Alas, that is so true when it is the others that should get done!

Best
H
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dainesefreak
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PostPosted: 11:36 - 27 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

It sounds to me like you are both arguing the same points really.

IMO the whole thing is that even with the existing laws none of the people who are riding or driving dangerously are being picked up any more.

We need to get the police back out on the roads policing the idiots not raising coffers for the Chief Inspectors champagne dinner & dance.

Anyway can I put you both down for "Browning Force" (hmm sounds kind of pervy, perhaps I need to come up with another name)?
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Jinx
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PostPosted: 11:38 - 27 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kickstart! your bike looks really sad (as in unhappy)! awww.
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bikedudextrm
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PostPosted: 12:20 - 27 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Get some loud sirens for your bike, thats bound to get them of their phones Laughing. Almost every time i get cut up by a car or have a near miss it's usually by people on their mobiles, i don't see how you can concentrate and be on the phone at the same time. The police should crack down on it alot more as it causes loads of accidents. It's down right stupid, the government should spend more money on tackling this problem instead of putting up more speed cameras which we have enough of. What also makes me laugh about speed camera's that round my area they are only on main roads and A-roads when i think they should be outside schools.
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McJamweasel
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PostPosted: 12:37 - 27 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Jinx wrote:
Kickstart! your bike looks really sad (as in unhappy)! awww.


Thats cos at the minute its all naked and abandoned in his garage, and even when it was fully clothed it barely got ridden!
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Frost
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PostPosted: 12:55 - 27 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

bikedudextrm wrote:
It's down right stupid, the government should spend more money on tackling this problem instead of putting up more speed cameras which we have enough of. What also makes me laugh about speed camera's that round my area they are only on main roads and A-roads when i think they should be outside schools.


They claim speed cameras are a deterrent forcing people to slow down. if this is the case, then why do they put them in such stupid places?
My nearest speed camera in on a decent road, with no driveways or pedestrian crossings. Yet the nearest school to my house which has a 30 limit EVERYBODY breaks has no speed cameras or proper pedestrian crossings
I'm sure we all wouldn't mind speed cameras so much if they were actually used sensibly.
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Josh
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PostPosted: 01:00 - 28 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

The two closest speed cameras to my house are, in my opinion, very well placed
One is after a small road "narrowing" (forcing cages to slow down) on the way into my village which has a 30mph speed limit, and lots of kids/a local school etc, basically the village is split in two by the main road, so it is kids/old people/everyone going over the road, a whole lot, so the road narrowing/speed camera is, I think, well placed.
T
he other is before a set of lights, and a swing bridge, that leads onto a deceptively narrow corner, it is a two lane road, but you won't get two lorries going round at the same time, likewise, two fast cars, so it slows people down for A: The Traffic lights which are for pedestrians on a riverside walking/cycling route, B: The actual swing bridge, as it is, suprisingly slippery sometimes. C:The sharp, narrowing corner which if followed by housing either side of the road, and leads up to a roundabout which will take you into A: the town center B: a village C: The motorway and beyond.
So anyway, to sum it up, my local gatso's, are well placed I think, and the only policeman I have ever seen hiding and clocking people, was in a village with a 20 limit, and to that, I say fair play, where I am from, they seem to be more about the real danger zones and safety. Thumbs Up
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mchaggis
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PostPosted: 14:10 - 28 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Too many speed cameras around where I live seem to be half-way down large hills, with 30 limits where there's only the edge of a council estate down one side, and open fields on the other.

It's far too easy to creep past that going down them. There's a couple by schools that I know of, I've spotted at load more which are doing little to protect road users at all. There's at least two accident blackspots by me which would benefit from a speed camera, one of them usually has a fatality every other year or so.
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Kickstart
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PostPosted: 14:29 - 28 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

mchaggis wrote:
There's at least two accident blackspots by me which would benefit from a speed camera, one of them usually has a fatality every other year or so.


One accident black spot round here which was used as an excuse for more than a dozen speed cameras on a 15 mile stretch of road. One camera just before the nasty junction. Seems it didn't make enough profit so they moved it several hundred yards after the nasty junction to a more profitable but otherwise meritless location.

All the best

Keith
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Bikerbabe
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PostPosted: 15:09 - 28 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

People on mobiles do my head in. The amount of times that me and the other half have almost been hit by car drivers on their phones.
There was the time stu got hit on a roundabout by a driver on his phone, than the time in town when this guy done a wrong turning. I mean whats the point of putting other peoples live in danger?
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silent
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PostPosted: 15:21 - 28 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

make everyone wear crash helmets, even in cars...thatll soon sort em :p
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paulcdb
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PostPosted: 06:46 - 29 May 2004    Post subject: Reply with quote

Its a shame gsm phone jammer's are illiegal otherwise i'd be tempted to invest in one under my seat, mind you not sure it'd be too safe either as they'll probably end up looking at there phone signal and wondering why it's disapeared Evil or Very Mad

Oh well!!
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