Amsterdam: What You Need To Know

[2E]

Ok, i've just come back from a long weekend in Amsterdam I thought it would be a good idea to put up a review and 'what you need to know' style list for anyone else anticipating a similar trip.

Feel free to add whatever you feel is missing/valid.. i will edit my post to include it.



Travel Options

There are many ways to get from the UK to Amsterdam, I personally come from Essex and the cheapest route turned out to be 'Eurolines' (National Express) from London Victoria to Amstel, Amsterdam.

Alternatively, there are overnight ferries (Newcastle etc), flights, and trains...

My advice is to check what is the cheapest and easiest form of transport for you, taking into account the amount of time it may take (the coach was 10 hours as an example) and make allowances for this



Cost


Amsterdam isn't cheap!! Currently the Euro is just a rip off.. almost a straight 1:1 swap to the pound which means you are often paying right over the odds.... pounds aren't accepted over there either obviously (some EU countries will take them due to exchange rate being better)

We obviously were trying to save as much money as possible with the transport and accommodation... although we ended up at an allegely 4* (star) hotel which the normal rate was 600 euros a night but we did 2 nights for 262 euros.... I wouldn't recommend the place tbh, more on that later.

Spending money is the obvious factor, how much can you afford to spend...Food wise: Fast food prices are good but a steakhouse can sting you for 50 euros easily without you even realising it...
If you can't see the prices before ordering anything, my advice is not to bother.....

Febo is a self-service style fast food restaurant with the food all in mini-hotplate ovens and you pay about 1 euro-3 euro depending on what your after... e.g. cheeseburger is 2 euro.


If your going to go with a group, each take your own individual spending money and once you've found your way around the central part... organise a meeting place incase you want to do your own thing.. i'd advise not going around solo.



Accommodation

Cheap and cheerfuls the way forward IMO...

Amsterdam never sleeps, the good areas look even better at night time.. use the day time to 'sleep' if you must, or do a few museum visits/exploring .



As I said earlier the supposedly '4 star' hotel was rubbish, its called the 'Rembrandt Classic' if you should come across it.. the beds were comfy and the room was a fair size but there was nothing great about it when compared with a Hostel...

Word of advice: settle the bill upon arrival, we bought our stuff down to check out at 10am on Sunday, the guy put our bags behind the desk to hold them for us whilst we walked around town (our coach wasnt till 10pm) and said he needed us to 'pay the full bill (262 euros plus city tax..) we thought we had already paid when we booked online...

The guy was rude and arrogant, threatened us with allsorts and refused to give us our luggage and then took our passports so we couldn't go anywhere...

Long story short, turned out they had 'held the money' on the booking and the guy hadn't authorised it to take the money, so evidently was trying to charge us twice!!

We got them to cancel it, stole our passports back (he was checking a signature and we grabbed them whilst his back was turned) then asked to 'get some water from our bags' which when the guy brought our bags out to us, then went to get some 'forms' for us, we simply swung the bags over our shoulder and made a hasty exit... never to return to the hotel again

Win



Things To Do


Theres plenty to do in Amsterdam, theres the usual 'London' attractions as I call them (Madame Tussauds, Amsterdam Dungeon, Torture Museum) but only gay tourists go to Amsterdam to see any of that..


Heres a small list of things worth checking out:

Teasers: This is Amsterdams equivalent of 'Hooters' but unlike the US, Amsterdam realises that short skirts and low cut tops are the true items of clothing needed to draw in male customers! The girls are very nice!

Heineken Experience: Im not a big fan of beer, more of a spirt/cider man myself, and never tried Heineken, so i wasnt expecting anything great (in truth we were hiding incase the hotel had called the politie ) It was actually pretty good, 15 euro each to get in, 2 free pints of Heinekan extra cold/reg and a 'taster' one earlier in the tour.....



Red Light District: Yes, it has to be done... even if you are 'fine in that department' you can't NOT check out the red light district... my advice is to go at night, for two primary reasons, one, the girls in the daytime are nowhere near as good-looking as the night girls, and two, the area looks better at night anyway...

There are 'other districts' which aren't always so well lighted.. I knew about the Red VS Blue lights scenario (Blue lights mean trannys) but there are also 'Purple Lights' which are guys which have had the op I found one of these purple lights (was a red light with purple one on the other side) and the 'girl' looked believable... Stick to pure red or nothing... (unless your swinging the other way..)


The grey district is another name for 'big black momma alley' and the 'mature' windows.. we got chased by a rather horny big black momma when we made a wrong turn into the alleyway... if you want to haggle the price the women there are desperate!!!


Live Sex Show Clubs

Important thing to note about these places are that the Mafia own and run the whole red light district, you will find it hard to locate a policeman in this district, and if you do find one, you'll find it impossible to get a non-corrupt one

The 'live sex show' clubs are common, it doesn't really matter what one you go to as they are all interlinked really and basically run by the same people... we went to 'Moulin Rouge' and i ended up eating a banana from one of the girls... nice

The actual live sex show is poor, its like roleplay porn... seriously.. get on with it... and when they do get on with it theres nowt but a few fancy moves and light effects... and the girl never utters a sound... the dragon stayed asleep during the entire performance!



Things Not To Do

NEVER take pictures in the red light district.. even if its of the canal... unless you fancy your chances playing russian roulette with the mafia... we see one poor girl unknowingly sit beside the canal and snap off a fully-flashed shot of the RLD scene... within a minute she was carted off by the Mafia kicking and screaming.. we left sharpish as she was english too by the sounds of it.


Do NOT buy drugs off the street... you'll get offered crack and cocaine by all-sorts of dodgy people.. just say no politely and firmly and keep walking.. if in doubt head towards the nearest place of business/police... they will soon disappear.



Other things:


Citymaps are big and confusing to be honest, i found the 'free' one we got from the VODKAMuseum was alot easier as it showed the central of amsterdam rather than alot of the unimportant areas!!!

You CAN walk to practically anywhere you like in Amsterdam, but be wary when crossing the roads... the whole place is overrun with bicycles and chavs on scooters... not to mention those damn trams!!! Also you might see the odd big motorbike but its quite rare... the police bikes are Honda Transalps (i think..)





Thats all i can think of for now... anything else i will update later...

Enjoy
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[Ariel Badger]

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[colin1]

you were ripped off paying that much for the hotel.

I stayed in a 4 star hotel that was £100 a night. and a 3 star that was £80 a night.

There are places with shared toilet and shower for £45 a night.

I hired a 50cc moped for about £50 for a day. Great fun. Only a little faster than a bicycle, and its legal not to wear a helmet.

Worth doing, as you get to see bits a bit further out, with less effort. Nice to have a bit of variety.

Renting bicycles is also good and cheaper.
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[Ste]

Getting there... Easyjet is dead cheap is booked a couple of months in advance. From Essex the Harwich to Hook van Holland ferry and then the train to Amsterdam is probably the easiest.

Staying there... there are loads of places to stay without spending lots. Like places where the windows don't close properly so you have to fix them Have a look around other Amsterdam threads on BCF, but as soon as you step foot out Central Station then you'll start being hassled by people trying to sell hotel/hostel rooms. Don't give anyone your luggage or passport. There are lockers at Central Station where you can leave your luggage on the last day.

It's usual that online booking places don't charge you and that you settle the bill with the hotel.

It's Febo, not Zebo.

50 Euros for a steakhouse, you got ripped off. Near Leidseplein there's a good steak & ribs place that does all you can eat ribs for 15 euros.

With street dealers just don't say anything to them, ignore them and keep walking. Going to Amsterdam when it's raining is good as crack heads haven't invented coats or umbrellas yet.

A copy of this map is useful for finding your way around and it's got all the important places marked on it.

For all intents and purposes trams are free to use. Pedalo boats are another option for getting around in Amsterdam, not a good idea though cos there are lots of much bigger boats to avoid.

[Mudskipper]

Om nom, ribs


Ste, I'm staying on Oudezijds Achterburgwal in December, any tips on other cheap places to eat near there/any other useful info?
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"You're clumsy, you eat too much and you behave like a 12 year old boy. But you know what? Every once in a while, you find a thumb."

[Dragonfly]

Heels and cobbletones dont mix. (not that you need to know that but if you are bringing a female compainion).

go ice skating in dam square if they still have that and stuff your face with fresh baked goods and coffee from the stalls while your at it.

watch where your walking when I was there last everyone fell down our steps there was no rail round them and people where not looking where they where going. It was quite funny actually
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All the breast.
Muzza on Binge:
He's too busy beating the everloving shit out of Lizzie to notice this thread has taken a turn down Drama Avenue and stopped off at the popcorn shop.

[2E]

Im aware we were ripped off in more ways than one... well... i wasnt ripped off at all as my mate paid for himself and me the whole trip


Theres an all-you-can-eat ribs place off of Dam Square, dont know the road name but its opposite the grasshopper, we didn't do it as my mate dont like ribs and was being a gayer most of the trip.. hence the part where i say 'bring your own spending money'.

Vodka museum was shite tbh, flirting with the guide was fun and drinking different types of vodka for 2 euros a time wasnt too harsh but we had been drinking russian vodka mixed with green absinthe all morning...

If your thinking of going December time, book a flight now with easyjet.. late deals are crap and 10 hours on a coach with just an ipod isn't really 'fun'.

Another thing to note is Toilets, you can be charged anything from 50 cents to an euro to use a toilet in Amsterdam... if you find some weird looking plastic things these are public urinals....theres some at the red light district but they are quite hard to find otherwise... I thought 'fuck it, just go behind a tree', yeah right... no privacy in amsterdam!


Another vote for the cheapest hostel you can, your only going to use it to either dump your luggage or to sleep in... as long as its secure who cares..

We were told trams charge you, but i could be wrong.. unless your going across the city its hardly worth using a tram, you can walk there faster... renting a bike/bicycle would be a good idea, but you gotta be alert because the road systems scary
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Bringing Classic Bikes Back Into Fashion
Rides: 1980 Honda CX500

[Ste]

The charge you if you get on the trams with ticket inspectors, the other trams they expect you to buy a ticket from the machines.

Cycling in amsterdam sounds more dangerous than being on foot and there's a good chance the bike would get lost when you locked it up to railings and you'd have to spend ages working out which of the identical dutch bikes is the rental one.

[2E]

[Ste]

Macdonalds isn't for buying food from, you go there to skin up when walking around and it's raining. Or to take a shit.

[Mudskipper]

Already booked flights and accomodation a few months ago.

Think I'd struggle with public urinals (or urinals of any type! ), I'll bear in mind the price of bogs. Cheers for the tips
____________________
CBR125|||GSXR400|||CBR400|||CBR400|||CB250RS|||GSXR750|||CB250RS
"You're clumsy, you eat too much and you behave like a 12 year old boy. But you know what? Every once in a while, you find a thumb."

[2E]

[Acemastr]

Sounds scary as shit... many people(tourists) there?
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2017 KTM 350 XC-F - 2014 Yamaha R6 - 2005 Yamaha YZ125
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[2E]

[oldpink]

there are urinals on most streets you can use for a piss and there free
they are green metal screens that curve round on themself
cheep food, theres a chinese at the bottom of Warmdesstraat 2 minutes from Centraal
good cheap food, Febo no thanks even when I was munchied

you can get a decent hotel for €50 per head per night if you look around
www.hotels.nl is a good starting point and they tell you if city tax is included or not in the price
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Theory & hazard 24-may 2016, CBT 8th June 2016, MOD 1 2nd Aug 2016 Mod 2 2nd-Nov 2016 - Current bike CBR 600 RR

[Mudskipper]

[Clanger]

Amersterdam is built in grids, so if you feel like you might be lost, go either right right right, or left left left until you find a canal, and then follow one and you will either head right out of town, or back down to the main centre (towards the water front).

I stayed on a floating hotel (ie. boat) last time I was there, it was mega cheap!! Plus we set sail for Volendam and was able to explore this small place as well as the 'Dam.

Wandering around the sex shops late at night is very amusing, as they have all sorts of weird and wonderful items on display in the windows!
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[st3v3]

Insightful thread...

The only thing that caught my eye was this bit:

[TheDonUK]

If you go basically directly south, past Spui theres decent ish 2-3 star hotels for about 50 euros a night

As has been said the steakhouses are expensive, and McDonalds exist for your shitting purposes.

The last 3 times i have been when i havent ridden there i always rented a bicycle (from that place to the left of Centraal Station, MacBikes i think) But now Ste says you can rent a ped for 50 quid i might have to give that a crack.

I did that Eurolines 10 hour each way coach once too... Boring as fook, and you get treated like cattle by all the customs.

Im not going back to amsterdam while its 1 pound per euro.
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[Mister James]

[2E]

[Clanger]