The Official BCF Rule Book. 2009.

[Redoko]

So who will start?



First 6 quoted from Chris-Red
___________

# 1 Do not trust anything TonyTS50 says
# 2 Do not post anything in the workshop section with clean hands
# 3 99% of What TonyTS50 says is a lie
# 4 Flouncers will be mocked, severely
# 5 Flouncers that return will be mocked even more severely
# 6 Any thread made by The Warped one will be depressing
# 7 Borekit Bruisers who place links to their own threads in their signature before receiving a single reply suck ass.
# 8 Keith is all knowing, THOU SHALT NOT argue with keith.
# 9 Any thread containing the words MOPED and FASTER in any order shall also contain powerbands of many colours.
# 10 MSN conversations relived word for word in all their glory are strictly NOT ALLOWED
# 11 - Pictures, or it didn't happen - and your middle name is "billy bullshitter"
# 12 - If "G" Spells somthing wrong, it is to be assumed he is using the ancient latin spelling, and so is correct.
# 13 If Dunc doesn't crash at least once a week the world will stop spinning and all life will end so it is our solemn duty to make sure he keeps riding.
# 14 New members will refrain from whoring photo's of themselves at every opertunity under pain of humiliation.
# 15 All crashes will have a detailed description and where possible the blame shifted to either tyres, road conditions or a car driver.
# 15a No crash shall be retold without a paint diagram as a visual aid.
# 15b Being a hair away from death following your crash is not an excuse to not take photos. This includes missing limbs and decapitation
# 16 All obvious questions WILL be answered with a humorous picture containing the words google muthafucka.
# 17 Asking advice on the killing of reptiles is strictly forbidden.
# 18 All threads that degenerate into arguments and insults will be moved to fights and flame wars ( this rule only comes into force when the thread stops being side splitingly funny )
# 19 - Pictures of your missus in the nude, will increase your karma rating (assuming she's a fitty, and BCF members rate your post as cool)
# 20 All trolls will be fed to nowhere.elysium, you have been warned.
# 21 In the telling of any tale involving the police it is necassary to make them out to be evil and also include the word cvnts. If at all possible get the words sub human in there to.
# 22 Never ever under any circumstances mention your Karma or the lack of it. Bad things will follow.
# 23 - if you dont know what a noob is, your in the wrong place - please visit KIDDY'S FORUM and kindly sod off.
# 24 - 'spamers' will be shot, or run over.
# 25 - the spell check button is mandatory, not optional
# 26. Flouncers.
Once a member flounces they are required to go to log in page and set it to stay logged in and bookmark it. Then take a hammer to their keyboard and smash it. This way they can read BCF all day and will not type sh1t and lies.
# 27. When Ste comes online, automatically change your own threads to have NSFW tags pre-emptively.
# 28 All charity rides to be accompanied with a full run down of expenditure and must be submitted to G for scrutiny or you suffer the derision for having a paid jolly.
# 29 Do not post any photos that may be used against you at a later date.
# 30 Absolutely no furries allowed.
# 31 Thou shalt not ever claim you or your mates stock busa' has ever reached 200MPH.
# 32 Thou shalt not ever claim you or your mates 125cc 2 stroke has ever reached ~110MPH.
# 33 When you ask "what shall I do" in a situation connected with a female and the heart you will recieve the standard reply of "do her up the gary" and " punch her in the tits" . These are traditions and must not be broken under any circumstances. This also must be mentioned at the first 2 posts of the thread.
# 34: Never ever get involved in a PPQR* if it's between kickstart/Mister James/Hetzer or others generally. It's time you'll never get back so not worth it or with those mentioned above, there just isn't enough time in existence.
# 35: Colin1 will saying nothing that isn't already obvious to all. (This has it's uses though for the hard of thinking.)
# 36: Hetzer will refer to nothing that isn't a product of this false construct in which we all exist. Also, all posts will have there basis in ego.
# 37. Any threads containing the word "epic" or "legend", will be neither.
# 38. Ninjas > Pirates, or Ninjas < Pirates. It's an everlasting on going debate. Forever.
# 39. Threads never end on a post that says "End of."
# 40. Stating "FACT" at the end of a statement does not make that statement fact.
# 41. Any phone numbers posted, whether it be company or private will be passed onto CCC to "fuck them up/bring them to tears"
# 42: So, you're a new member and you think there's a possibility that someone might know you? Keep it to yourself.
# 43: Punch her in the tits
# 44. Any thread hereby older than three (3) English standard months that is resurrected by a n00b wilst have a humorous picture of a zombie, or Marty McFly and Doc Brown saying "Welcome to the past".
# 45. Any unsolicited commercial advertising will be punished by the red blob of death and/or a picture of Spider Man saying "My Spam sense is Tingling!" and/or a fine of up to £600 and/or three months in prison at the discretion of Keith and/or G.
# 46. Henceforth anything that Luke posts will mention that his wife is up said duff.
# 47. Despite FACT and END OF not being valid EOT (end of thread), FAIL is a perfectly acceptable end of thread. END OF.
# 48. As above. YOU SHALL NOT quote someone and post a emote YOU SHALL use the karma/rating facility instead.
# 49. Those asking questions in the workshop may make threads running to three pages but should stop posting as soon as the 125 is working so all those that tried to help should never discover what was actually wrong with it in the first place.
# 50. Green blobbers, you are inferior so learn to cope with it and show some respect.
# 51 No, Korn still isn't here.
# 52 Thou shalt not whine when it takes more than 30 minutes to be accepted to a regional group. The mods of said sections do (occasionally) have a life.
# 52. People with enough privileges can alter "Pirates > Ninjas" to "Ninjas > Pirates".
# 53. Calling a workshop thread "Help!" is not likely to result in help.
# 54. When posting in the workshop section, give as many details as possible. The make and model of the motorcycle you are having a problem with would probably count as a good idea to start with.
# 55. The cheapest and easiest way to a significantly faster bike is to do your test and buy a faster bike.
# 56. Any thread, once started, is fair game to take its course anywhere else, regardless of protests to stay on topic or answer the initial question.
# 57. Photos of yourself or bike, family, friends and pets will be subjected to ridicule.
# 58. Don't use bold caps...it still pisses people off.
# 59. When a female posts her photo on BCF, she is automatically classed as 'fit' no matter what she looks like or even if she's wearing a helmet.
# 60 there are NO GURLZ ON TE INTERWEBZ!
# 61 All photographs of members sporting facial hair shall be rated on the 1930 Ariel scale - then ridiculed.
# 63 Any thread with "what 125 shall I get" will be filled with insults about 125's followed by " do you test" followed by "get a cg" .
# 64 Any thread containing the title "nodding" will be called so last century!
# 65 Anyone using text speak in their posts will be karma bitch slapped into the red zone.
# 66 Dragonfly must have her Avatar as it is now.
# 67.a "Put a Donk on it " is an acceptable answer for anything with regards to a bike being fixed...
# 67.b Also an acceptable term for a a stonking minger.. aka wheelie.
# 68. All Lesbians and Gays can be converted. End of
# 69.
# 70. Mouthwash.
# 71 Saying Fvck instead of Fuck was gay in 2005. It is still gay in 2009. Don't be such a fucking coward and bask in the green blobs you cunt.
# 72. Anybody who posts "Bikers Poem" has in fact contracted bad aids and as a new tradition (oxymoron?) shall be irrationally karma bashed into the depths of hell just for 'lulz' in a /b/tard kinda way.
# 73. rules one and two of the internet.
# 74 you don't talk about BCF
# 75 you don't talk about BCF
# 76. When starting a thread that requires the maintenance of a list that is built by forum community, the OP will lose interest after a week.
# 77 ..If at any time you lob your bike at the scenery, then post and tell us, we will try and scavenge bits from said wreckage...
# 78 Anyone who joins that has a 50 cc and seems a bit strange is TIT 50 until proven otherwise, then directed to his legendary thread so they instantly get the jist of BVF metality and quickly
# 79 any post made by cvntdude will be karma bashed till it is no longer visable.
# 80 Dunc shall no longer be allowed to ride japanese CG's. He will however be allowed to ride a chinese copy of a chinese copy of a real CG.
# 81 You do not ever, ever tell anyone that BCF is entirely in your mind, as a figment of an imagination lacking social skills and friends. Because it is totally true.
# 82 No matter what section... sexuality will always be mentioned through admission, accusation, or innuendo.
# 83 The day that kickstart's post doesnt end "All the best ......Keith" is the day that the interweb will swallow bcf.
# 84 The next person who trys to hit the ceiling with a wank splat will instantly turn gay because dunc is el roofo spunkero mastero. Even if he does do it from the top bunk.
# 85 If you hate spelling mistakes and quote some one that has, and tell us you do, 9/10 you'll make one or two yourself, which will then be quoted and corrected for you..
# 86 Any posts stating "Will this thread reach [insert no.] Posts/entries" will either end the thread in an undignified and boring manner, or spur the thread on to last another few months at least.
# 87 Hetzers law of the internet applies to all topics dealing with politics or the criminal justice system. Hetzers Law = (Godwins Law)²
# 88 here is no rule 88. For 8 is the greatest number of all and succeeds pirates whom intern succeed ninja's. This is rule 88. and yet it is not so as there is no rule 88.
# 89 mac_kaliba kills threads
# 90 Dunc resurrects them.
# 91 During the secret santa for bcf, at least one member should recieve a butt plug or some other sexually orientated present. no matter how useless.
# 91a Said recipient will feign disgust, but will try it at least twice.
# 92 Tonyts50/Shadowbiker/whatever is a proper mental.
# 93 Tonytit50... or 'shadowbiker'... will NEVER gain the respect of BCF. The shame is far too great to be possibly comprehended and/or measured by any measuring instrument known to man. Ever.
# 94 rules by TonyTS50 or any of his sockpuppets will be ignored and overwritten by rules pertaining to the first things that pops into your head.
# 95 Any claim of anything from shadowbiker/tonyts50/whatever he's called this week, shall be called into question until there pics are provided to back this up. Evidence should be submitted within 1 (one) standard british week for scrutiny. Failure to provide this or should the evidence be found to be falsified, shall result in the general population calling fail, and tonyts50/shadowbiker/the tooth fairy/father christmas shall recieve a donk.
# 96 Anyone who reposts a rule, whether it be directly or as a reworded version, shall be laughed at until they flounce.
# 97 People who end all their sentences with the word "people" shall be punched in the garry and fucked in the tits until they are dead.
# 98 a) Anyone who has joined before you and has a higher karma rating than you is automatically right and you are wrong.
# 98 b) Anyone who has joined before you regardless of karma rating is automatically right and you are wrong.
# 99 A Honda is never better.
# 100
____________________
"Let's face it, this is not the worst thing you've caught me doing."
Sudika Sportsman SK50QT > Gilera DNA50 > Honda CBR125 RW7 > Kawasaki Zephyr750 > Suzuki GSXR600 > Honda Hornet CB600F '51

[T1z3R]

#7 Borekit Bruisers who place links to their own threads in their signature before receiving a single reply suck ass.
____________________
duck my sick!

[wizzzard]

#8 Keith is all knowing, THOU SHALT NOT argue with keith.

#9 Any thread containing the words MOPED and FASTER in any order shall also contain powerbands of many colours.
____________________
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
Zeitgeist / Addendum / Moving forward

[wizzzard]

#10 MSN conversations relived word for word in all their glory are strictly NOT ALLOWED
____________________
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
Zeitgeist / Addendum / Moving forward

[Ol]

[wizzzard]

#13 If Dunc doesn't crash at least once a week the world will stop spinning and all life will end so it is our solemn duty to make sure he keeps riding.

#14 New members will refrain from whoring photo's of themselves at every opertunity under pain of humiliation.
____________________
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
Zeitgeist / Addendum / Moving forward

[wizzzard]

#15 All crashes will have a detailed description and where possible the blame shifted to either tyres, road conditions or a car driver.

#15a No crash shall be retold without a paint diagram as a visual aid.
____________________
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
Zeitgeist / Addendum / Moving forward

[Bofh5]

[wizzzard]

#16 All obvious questions WILL be answered with a humorous picture containing the words google muthafucka.

#17 Asking advice on the killing of reptiles is strictly forbidden.

#18 All threads that degenerate into arguments and insults will be moved to fights and flame wars ( this rule only comes into force when the thread stops being side splitingly funny )
____________________
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
Zeitgeist / Addendum / Moving forward

[Ol]

#19 - Pictures of your missus in the nude, will increase your karma rating (assuming she's a fitty, and BCF members rate your post as cool)
____________________
Previous: Cub50, NRG50, TS50, YB100, CB125, NSR125, ZZR600, CBF1000, SV650s, ZX6R B1H, XT250, Mito Powered Crosser, WRF450, , FZ600, VN800, GSXR600 - Currently CB1000R

[wizzzard]

#20 All trolls will be fed to nowhere.elysium, you have been warned.

#21 In the telling of any tale involving the police it is necassary to make them out to be evil and also include the word cvnts. If at all possible get the words sub human in there to.

#22 Never ever under any circumstances mention your Karma or the lack of it. Bad things will follow.
____________________
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
Zeitgeist / Addendum / Moving forward

[Ol]

# 23 - if you dont know what a noob is, your in the wrong place - please visit KIDDY'S FORUM and kindly sod off.


# 24 - 'spamers' will be shot, or run over.

# 25 - the spell check button is mandatory, not optional

https://1.bp.blogspot.com/_k1tLuizXUns/Sqkau3umncI/AAAAAAAABmE/_M4qIyjpd-I/s400/spell+check.JPG
____________________
Previous: Cub50, NRG50, TS50, YB100, CB125, NSR125, ZZR600, CBF1000, SV650s, ZX6R B1H, XT250, Mito Powered Crosser, WRF450, , FZ600, VN800, GSXR600 - Currently CB1000R

[Paddy Blake]

26. Flouncers.
Once a member flounces they are required to go to log in page and
set it to stay logged in and bookmark it.
Then take a hammer to their keyboard and smash it.
This way they can read BCF all day and will not type sh1t and lies.

Paddy.

[The Original Muzza]

#27. When Ste comes online, automatically change your own threads to have NSFW tags pre-emptively.
____________________
Current Bikes: Husqvarna Svartpilen 401 (2020)
Former Bikes: Honda MSX125 (2014), BMW Funduro (1996), Honda VT500 (1983), Yamaha FZR250 (1989), Suzuki GZ125 Marauder(2005),:Triumph TT600 (2002) (stolen)
From then on, I and the bicycle feelings deeper.

[wizzzard]

#28 All charity rides to be accompanied with a full run down of expenditure and must be submitted to G for scrutiny or you suffer the derision for having a paid jolly.

#29 Do not post any photos that may be used against you at a later date.

#30 Absolutely no furries allowed.
____________________
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
Zeitgeist / Addendum / Moving forward

[Faldo]

[Alexio]

# 31 Thou shalt not ever claim you or your mates stock busa' has ever reached 200MPH.

# 32 Thou shalt not ever claim you or your mates 125cc 2 stroke has ever reached ~110MPH.
____________________
will never give up his CG. I look at my fuel gauge more as a progress bar than a fuel gauge.
G: With my GSXR I do often effectively use it as a scooter with a clutch in town.
ms51ves3: why does it need 500 miles? Are you teaching it how to be a piston?

[UnknownStuntm...]

pfft.

#1 - There are no rules in BCF.

It's all we need.

[Dragonfly]

#33 When you ask "what shall I do" in a situation connected with a female and the heart you will recieve the standard reply of "do her up the gary" and " punch her in the tits" . These are traditions and must not be broken under any circumstances. This also must be mentioned at the first 2 posts of the thread.
____________________
All the breast.
Muzza on Binge:
He's too busy beating the everloving shit out of Lizzie to notice this thread has taken a turn down Drama Avenue and stopped off at the popcorn shop.

[pa_broon74]

34: Never ever get involved in a PPQR* if it's between kickstart/Mister James/Hetzer or others generally. It's time you'll never get back so not worth it or with those mentioned above, there just isn't enough time in existence.

35: Colin1 will saying nothing that isn't already obvious to all. (This has it's uses though for the hard of thinking.)

36: Hetzer will refer to nothing that isn't a product of this false construct in which we all exist. Also, all posts will have there basis in ego.




*: Point by Point Quoted Rebuttal.
____________________
Didn't catch anything.

[The Shaggy D.A.]

37. Any threads containing the word "epic" or "legend", will be neither.
38. Pirates > Ninjas.
39. Threads never end on a post that says "End of."
____________________
Chances are quite high you are not in my Monkeysphere, and I don't care about you. Don't take it personally.
Currently : Royal Enfield 350 Meteor
Previously : CB100N > CB250RS > XJ900F > GT550 > GPZ750R/1000RX > AJS M16 > R100RT > Bullet 500 > CB500 > LS650P > Bullet Electra X & YBR125 > Bullet 350 "Superstar" & YBR125 Custom > Royal Enfield Classic 500 Despatch Limited Edition (28 of 200) & CB Two-Fifty Nighthawk > ER5

[.....]

40. Stating "FACT" at the end of a statement does not make that statement fact.

[MattHirst]

[lllN30lll]

41. Any phone numbers posted, whether it be company or private will be passed onto CCC to "fuck them up/bring them to tears"
____________________
Turbo R1
CRF450R

[pa_broon74]