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Amazing things that have happened in your life?

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Bubbs
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PostPosted: 13:18 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Amazing things that have happened in your life? Reply with quote

I love reading peoples stories so here is another reason to post.

I'll start with the most surreal/amazing thing that happened when I was about 10 in primary school...

In primary school we were forced to do a music class where the slower kids had a triangle and the more clued up kids had recorders (like a flute). I was given a recorder even though I probably should have had a triangle.

Anyway we were given a song to learn but I had daydreamed and not listened to the lesson on how to read music. SO I went home full of anxiety knowing that I didn't have a clue how to play this song (we'd never heard it before). My parents were useless as they were musicly inept, and the internet had not been invented yet.

So I decided to make up my own tune and develop my own unique way of writing it down on paper by using a series of dots.. i.e cover one hole = 1dot 2 holes=2dots etc etc. I eventually worked out a nice simple little tune that sounded quite impressive (to me) that I could try and pass off so that I don't get bollocked by the teacher.

I went into the music lesson the next day feeling a bit worried. So I sat down and the teacher decided to go through us one by one and play the tune as it should be played.... Kid one goes first and starts playing.... I wake up instantly from all my worries and think I know this tune.... The more he plays the more I think ive heard this before.

....Turns out the song i'd invented was the exact song that I was supposed to learn albeit with a slightly different ending.

Beat that!!!!
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5v3d3b0
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PostPosted: 13:27 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

I farted pretty loud once Thumbs Up
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SlimRick
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PostPosted: 14:01 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

I found 6 pence behind the back seat of a car I'd just bought......it was a truly awesome day!
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MattHirst
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PostPosted: 14:30 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

SlimRick wrote:
I found 6 pence behind the back seat of a car I'd just bought......it was a truly awesome day!


I love finding 50p's, £1 coins and stuff down the side of seats. I once found a tenner in the bottom of my glove box...RESULT!

Don't really have any amazing stories/surreal moments, guess i've lead a pretty boring life.

Although waking up in ICU with a body still full of sedatives and analgesics give me some pretty wild and vivid hallucinations and dreams. They were so mental it was actually scary sometimes (i laugh about them now but i was truly frightened at the time). They were extremely vivid though, i thought they were actually happening until i was later told that it was just the drugs in my system.....would give anything to get some more of them drugs Laughing
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GhostRider
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PostPosted: 14:37 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

I curled out a fudge dragon once that I swear they would have had to have warned ships about if it was released into the ocean. It was over a foot long and was a single piece, it felt like I was shitting out Frank Brunos leg sideways.

Twas a proud day, alas no pictures exist of this mythical creature I deemed the bog mess monster (from the way it humped in and out of the water, much like the photos of the fabled scottish beast).

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Feasty
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PostPosted: 15:16 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

I walked out of a small electrical shop once and saw a fiver lying on the floor, picked it up and looked around checking if anyone might be claiming it - no-one around at all and no-one left in the shop so I pocketed it.
Just as I was walking away I got thinking that perhaps it had fallen out when someone was putting their wallet/money back into a pocket, therefore there could be more lying around. I turn around and have a look, only to spot a tenner nearby - I pocketed that too!! Laughing Laughing
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Handsome
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PostPosted: 15:22 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Re: Amazing things that have happened in your life? Reply with quote

dafyddjohndavies wrote:

Anyway we were given a song to learn but I had daydreamed and not listened to the lesson on how to read music.

....Turns out the song I'd invented was the exact song that I was supposed to learn albeit with a slightly different ending.

Beat that!!!!


Subliminally learned by ear ?...

The reason you had a different ending was that was about the time you'd tuned out altogether, as that was when you were worried wether that fart you'd just squeezed out had lumps in...
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Handsome
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PostPosted: 15:24 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

GhostRider wrote:
I curled out a fudge dragon once that I swear they would have had to have warned ships about if it was released into the ocean. It was over a foot long and was a single piece, it felt like I was shitting out Frank Brunos leg sideways.

Twas a proud day, alas no pictures exist of this mythical creature I deemed the bog mess monster (from the way it humped in and out of the water, much like the photos of the fabled scottish beast).

GhostRider


I did that once when I was about twelve, although this was one straight length, had to beat it with the fire poker, my Mom loves to tell that story now and then to show me up...
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MattHirst
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PostPosted: 15:27 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

So you curled out a nice log, couldn't flush it so asked your mum if you could borrow the fire poker to stab your shit? Laughing
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Handsome
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PostPosted: 15:41 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

MattHirst wrote:
So you curled out a nice log, couldn't flush it so asked your mum if you could borrow the fire poker to stab your shit? Laughing


No, I finished up, happened to look back, stood there amazed for about a minute then flushed and left...

It came to light when my cousin who lived with us at the time went in a while later to be confronted by King Kong's Finger pointing straight at her, she told my Mom ( Grass ) and my Mom made me stove it in with the poker, so I also have my Cousin re-telling that one at family parties as well...

I'm sat here laughing like fuck just remembering it Laughing
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Bubbs
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PostPosted: 15:48 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Subliminally learned by ear ?...


Yeah maybe... that's pretty amazing though how your subliminal memory works.

Quote:
I curled out a fudge dragon once that I swear they would have had to have warned ships about if it was released into the ocean. It was over a foot long and was a single piece, it felt like I was shitting out Frank Brunos leg sideways.


'loosely' reminds me of when I was all bunged up from a cold and I did this one massive blow out of my left nostril into my hand and a mucusy congealed viscous snob shot out and filled my hand. literally massive, it was like the gunk that get's dropped on you in fun house but harder. It was huge... it actually cleared my nose right up and i could breathe again.... Such relief!!!
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Ste
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PostPosted: 15:54 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

As this seems to be turning into a shit thread, can anyone beat any of these 'achievements'? https://www.ratemypoo.com/top.html
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Handsome
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PostPosted: 16:03 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ste wrote:
As this seems to be turning into a shit thread, can anyone beat any of these 'achievements'? https://www.ratemypoo.com/top.html


Mate of mine was at a family do when he went for a piss with a relative of his, all the urinals were ocupied so he opened the stall door, to be confronted with pretty much what I've posted above, he then shouts his relative over to have a look and they both start laughing, he gets his camera phone out to take a picture ( why I have no idea ) just as he'd lined the camera up for a shot, one of the bloke using the urinal walks up behind him to look over his shoulder and asks him if he's proud of that one, he couldn't convince the bloke it wasn't his, he told me the bloke just kept staring at him all night Laughing ...
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MattHirst
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PostPosted: 16:27 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

NSR-AD wrote:
MattHirst wrote:
So you curled out a nice log, couldn't flush it so asked your mum if you could borrow the fire poker to stab your shit? Laughing


No, I finished up, happened to look back, stood there amazed for about a minute then flushed and left...

It came to light when my cousin who lived with us at the time went in a while later to be confronted by King Kong's Finger pointing straight at her, she told my Mom ( Grass ) and my Mom made me stove it in with the poker, so I also have my Cousin re-telling that one at family parties as well...

I'm sat here laughing like fuck just remembering it Laughing


I gave you funny karma just because your cousin had to stare at 'king kongs finger', most important part being that your cousin is a girl. Why are girls never proud of their dumps but yet men take pride in how big their shite is Laughing
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Irn-Bru
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PostPosted: 17:08 - 15 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

I found a £20 note when I was like 13. Was pretty epic considering I got a few quid pocket money per week Thumbs Up But, erm, nothing really amazing... I went to Mississippi the other year, that was pretty fun talking to hill billies and being an American for two weeks Thumbs Up The 40c temperature with 100% humidity wasn't fun though, nor was the epic sun burn I went home with. Geordie accents and southern american ones do NOT mix though, a few times people thought I was talking another language.. then there was the being mistaken for being Irish thing. Oh and Australian Confused
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MarJay
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PostPosted: 11:15 - 16 Jan 2010    Post subject: Re: Amazing things that have happened in your life? Reply with quote

dafyddjohndavies wrote:
I love reading peoples stories so here is another reason to post.

I'll start with the most surreal/amazing thing that happened when I was about 10 in primary school...

In primary school we were forced to do a music class where the slower kids had a triangle and the more clued up kids had recorders (like a flute). I was given a recorder even though I probably should have had a triangle.

Anyway we were given a song to learn but I had daydreamed and not listened to the lesson on how to read music. SO I went home full of anxiety knowing that I didn't have a clue how to play this song (we'd never heard it before). My parents were useless as they were musicly inept, and the internet had not been invented yet.

So I decided to make up my own tune and develop my own unique way of writing it down on paper by using a series of dots.. i.e cover one hole = 1dot 2 holes=2dots etc etc. I eventually worked out a nice simple little tune that sounded quite impressive (to me) that I could try and pass off so that I don't get bollocked by the teacher.

I went into the music lesson the next day feeling a bit worried. So I sat down and the teacher decided to go through us one by one and play the tune as it should be played.... Kid one goes first and starts playing.... I wake up instantly from all my worries and think I know this tune.... The more he plays the more I think ive heard this before.

....Turns out the song i'd invented was the exact song that I was supposed to learn albeit with a slightly different ending.

Beat that!!!!


Maybe its because...


All recorder music sounds exactly the smegging same?

Sorry to ruin your child prodigy ideas! Wink
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fenton
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PostPosted: 16:37 - 16 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

Was at work one day at McD's and walked into the back room to find my mate sheepishly standing by the big black waste bin. After a couple of minutes of grilling him about what he was doing he admitted he had farted. But crossed the threshold and released a poo nugget which rolled down his leg and onto the kitchen floor. So he picked it up and took it to the bin. The thing is, he will willingly admit this too anyone. And i cant remember him goin to wipe after he went back to work. That was pretty epic.
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st3v3
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PostPosted: 17:14 - 16 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think it's amazing you're all sooo proud of shit. Laughing
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MattHirst
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PostPosted: 17:23 - 16 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well if it's a decent shit then you've got right to be proud of it Laughing
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Robby
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PostPosted: 17:29 - 16 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

St Patricks day 2006. I was at Daytona beach, and it was spring break for all of the young American girls.

Hi, I'm Rob. I'm half Irish, and I'm a pilot. I live in London.

So. Much. Poon.
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Skudd
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PostPosted: 21:26 - 16 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

We glued a 50 pence piece to the floor, should have seen the people try to pick it up without looking like tramps. .
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TUG
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PostPosted: 21:55 - 16 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

Proving doctors wrong with the nerve damage in my arm.
I guess theres loads of shit that i've done amazingly but cant remember lol
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swiftb
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PostPosted: 22:08 - 16 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

I once sieved my poo to make sure I had shit out the hammer from a small pistol (which I had swallowed) (not the whole pistol just the hammer part Surprised ), good times.
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st3v3
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PostPosted: 00:29 - 17 Jan 2010    Post subject: Reply with quote

Maybe breaking my thumb while my arm was already in a cast - it was clean break at the base and healed fully within 2 weeks. Cool
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The Shaggy D.A.
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PostPosted: 11:41 - 17 Jan 2010    Post subject: Re: Amazing things that have happened in your life? Reply with quote

MarJay wrote:
All recorder music sounds exactly the smegging same?


I got picked for a school concert once, the teacher figured I was good enough on a descant that she's switch me to a treble. The tuning was different and I'd only learned the part by ear, so when the concert finally came, I mimed all the way through. Poor old Mrs Eddowes though I'd played brilliantly.
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