Sticks and Stones

[killa]

As you may or may not know I’ve been planning on having a go at stand up.
I’ve been attending all sorts in my area seeing how the shows tick and how n00bs fair up to the pressure.
A good friend of mine now runs a local night called ‘Resist the Glamour’ it’s a nice set up which is gaining a following, she wants me to host for an evening at some point, so this is another reason why I’m hanging around these shows.
Anyways, last night she invited me to an event with Ava Vidal headlining, a tall black female comedian who I have only caught glimpses of on TV.
She was hanging around the bar for the most part, ignoring people and generally trying to look cool, watching the other acts. The host for the evening was a young lad with a slapstick potty mouth approach, he was annoying but I know he ran the event and hosted so i think he’s learning as he goes.
During the second break he offered around some post it notes and pens to write something funny, up on the projector read the message ‘something you wouldn’t hear on a consumer programme’....now it popped into my head straight away, something i read ages ago on the internet, I don’t know why, it’s even slightly out of context.
SLAVERY REINSTATED, CATCH YOURSELF A STRONG ONE
Now, I didn’t mention black people, slavery has occurred and still occurs on many continents. So I saw it as just a slavery joke, nothing that amazing really.

The notes were handed in and the time come to read them out, most of them deserved a chuckle, some none at all. Mine was read out and i was at the bar, a large number of people laughed at this, and during which time the host asked who wrote it. My mate pointed me out and i raised my hand. Ava turns to me with a very stern look and says “Did you write that?” I said “Yeah”, she replied “I’ll remember you for later” and turned away.
Bloody hell, are you shitting me woman?!
The host called me to go to the front of the stage and Ava shouts “If that wins Aaron I’m not going on”. I just shrugged and drank my pint.
I mean she’s been in the company of some top comedians every week for god knows how long, some of which you know have at some point made similar statements. But me, simple member of the public and I’m instantly the bad man.

The funny thing was, i stayed, i wanted a ruck....she came on, the first joke was about the BNP and how they fucked something during the world cup, i had no idea, shit joke anyway.
She then mentioned the post it notes on the floor, describing it as “discarded racism” and said quite calmly, “i was stood next to him at the bar, and im much bigger than him, i was like....yeah...try it” She’s about 6ft2” in heels so yeah she was taller than me.
My first thought was, try what?? Did she think i write that kinda stuff everywhere i go punching black people left, right and centre...including women?!! LOL

Then what totally took the piss is that her ENTIRE set was based around racist shit....jokes like....some people think ALL black people have aids, thats not even remotely funny. She mentioned Jews, Muslims, Black people...all of it may have been to someone offensive....but because she’s saying it, it’s OK?!
LOL what a cunt. Her set was so 1995 it was untrue, i feel like messaging her on Facebook and say I’ll be at her next gig waiting for a joke.
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Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.
Bike:- Yamaha TRX850 | Killas Biking History | Killas Gaming History | Killas autmotive history

[Nai]

Go to her next gig and heckle. I have had a go at stand up before, most comedians I met can take any joke as a joke. The ones that couldn't were terrible when heckled as they often couldn't make a comeback, stuttered, stalled, got laughed at, got annoyed and merriment at their expense resumed.

[Flip]

I once made a comment about slavery in front of a black woman who was cleaning up, the only people that took offence were white.

[FURBAR]

fAIR FUCKING PLAY, BALLS NEEDED FOR SUCH A TASK ... capps ..
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Fuk um !!

[mistergixer]

Best heckling i ever heard was at a Northern working men's club, the comedian was pretty dire, just after the punchline, someone at the back shouted out:

"Tell us a joke!"


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Space Monkey #7
Don Eladio is dead. His capos are dead. You have no one left to fight for. Fill your pockets and leave in peace. Or fight me and die!
Mistergixer's videos on YouTube

[FURBAR]

If the comedian ask you what you do, say ..

I'm a talent scout, and i'm not impressed ...
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Fuk um !!

[Misc]

I'd say she wasn't offended by the joke but she was offended by a newbie telling it. Almost as if you have to 'work' your way to controversial jokes like she 'did', although i've never heard of her.

She probably would never of said it if it was the same situation with well known comedians.

[tatters]

Some people are politically correct narrow minded idiots who think only Africans were enslaved while they may of been the last mass use of slaves and some small numbers are still currently being used in two islamic countrys there were certinly not the first and largest use of slave labour.

Hundreads of thosands of europeans were abducted and taken as slaves during the 1500-1600,s by arabs to be sold on the barbary coast inculding a large numbers from cornwall and devon ,entire coastal villages would just disapear over night due to slaver raids.

Even further back in history and you got the Romans using millions of europeans as industral slave labour over almost a thosand years.
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[Ste]

Do all black people have a problem with slavery?

Or is it just mine?

[killa]

Yeah and i'm sure many white children were carted off for hard labour and told their parents are dead.
____________________
Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.
Bike:- Yamaha TRX850 | Killas Biking History | Killas Gaming History | Killas autmotive history

[J0Al1]

I thought comedians were supposed to have a sence of humour?

[GhostRider]

[mistergixer]

[Skudd]

White kids were still being carted off down to the land of jumping rats into the late 60's on so call adoptions. just slavery at its worst.


I have found the biggest racist are now the ethnic comedians on tv now. apparently they are saying how it is. One of the worst is the guy who does the insurance ads.


People have to realise that it wasn't the whites who invented slavery, we were just bloody good at it, and it was the whites who tried to stop it, but the blacks still carry it on ... even now.


And as for who has the power. look at the top people in America, mostly black, from top sports person, top paid actor, top paid celeb, president!!!!!!. Even the top dictator is black. most corrupt.... black.

So all these PC brigade can just fuck off back to thier own little world of hate.
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Famous last words of Humpty Dumpty. " Stop pushing me "
Petty Anarchists look at "1984".............. The Visionary looks at "Animal Farm".

[killa]

Whoa ok Skudd, can of worms and all that.lol
I just found last night very ‘interesting’ kinda like a social experiment. I mean why wasn’t everyone in there last night a racist for laughing? It’s because none of them give a fuck.
I don’t give a fuck about race like i don’t give a fuck about religion. Fuck you and fuck me too, we’re all worm food. Disgusting, each and every one.

Her last joke before she left the stage was “A guy messaged me on Facebook saying, ‘racism doesn’t really exist anymore, stop going on about it’” Her reply was “If you’re walking down a dark alleyway and turn to see a big black man stood there, you don’t say, ‘Phew, thank god for that’”
Isn’t that a dumb thing to say? I mean I’ve been to Brixton on a night out and I’ve been down a dark street when two black guys crossed the road and said “Eay White boi” one hand in the pocket, wobbly walk. Thankfully they only wanted to sell me drugs.
____________________
Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.
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[nowhere.elysium]

Be warned, I'm going into minor rant mode, and I can't guarantee that al of this will make sense.


Firstly, the internet is powered solely by schadenfreude, so it doesn't translate well into real humour, per se.

Secondly, Ava Vidal isn't particularly funny, so I wouldn't freak out about her opinion overmuch.

If you're thinking of going into standup, you're going to need to gauge your audience well, and it would appear that you've come a cropper on that one joke. Big deal. I'd suggest that you stick with safer stuff for now (i.e. not race-related; only people that are non-west european are allowed to make race jokes at the moment), and work your way through to race jokes.

Well-intentioned idiots will always get up in arms as soon as race is mentioned. Fuck 'em. People are different from one another, and there are times when this is funny. The trick is to pick on things that people actually do, as opposed to sticking with old rote stereotypes that are tenuous at best.

England and America have both still got massive guilt complexes about slavery and conquest. They're not the only cultures that have perpetrated these deeds (which I do find reprehensible), but they're the most well-documented, and they had the longest-standing effects (specifically, the Anglo-American culture that's permeated every other country on the planet).
Avatar is a fine example: American-led troops take over a planet occupied by indigenous tribespeople who live in harmony with the land, American troops try to knock as many of them off as posible. Sole American trooper with a conscience becomes one of the tribespeople. Everyone gets a happy glow.

The current trend for Rap/Hip-Hop culture is another example. Because it's supposed to be about 'keeping it real' (i.e. you get what you grab), it appeals to those that don't bother thinking overmuch. There's good Hip-Hop out there, and then there's crap like Fifty Cent and so forth. I saw some complete waster* quoting the 'get rich or die trying' shit that he spouts recently, and I just found myself thinking 'try thinking of tomorrow instead of today, and you may find that's both retarded and unnecessary'.

I find myself wishing that Rap/Hip-Hop culture would be supplanted by Blues culture; yeah, life's shit, but if you get back up and give it another crack, you'll get somewhere. It also has the added bonus of having musical merit (i.e. Blues artists can usually play an instrument, and sing, as opposed to grunting at a mic with several other men an one token bit of skirt)


*Known twat/racketeer who intimidates local shop owners, because he can't be arsed to actually earn anything.

For the record: I'm white, my Mrs isn't, and I live in an area where White west europeans are in the distinct minority (I think the current ratio is about 20%). Fuck race. Cut people open and they're all the same inside. Red and leaky.
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[MonkeyKnuckle]

[Skudd]

It is just like the Gay Pride stuff. Liverpool is to have its first Gay Pride rally/parade. Whatever.

I don't care what you get upto in the bedroom, I think we are all equal. I don't think any more or less of you just because you like things differently to me. BUT why should I have it paraded around the City. Graham Norton is a funny guy who happens to be gay. To me he isn't a Gay who happens to be funny.

Alan Carr he just plays on the gayness and the ugly can't do a thing, and as such isn't funny.

I'm not allows to be pride in my culture of the fact that I'm a breeder, or that I'm straight ( by the way I don't like the term straight as it is given to us heterosexuals by the homosexuals as a derogatory term)

It really bugs me when people use thier race colour creed orientation as a badge of honour.
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Famous last words of Humpty Dumpty. " Stop pushing me "
Petty Anarchists look at "1984".............. The Visionary looks at "Animal Farm".

[Harold_Shand]

Black women are fucking mad. Mate have you seen her fb page... your famous
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BCF's 6th favourite poster 2009-2010

Harold_Shand's theory might be the best explanation.

[Harold_Shand]

what a shame I cant comment on her page without being a 'friend'.
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BCF's 6th favourite poster 2009-2010

Harold_Shand's theory might be the best explanation.

[Skudd]

[Mister James]

[DanceLikeAMon...]

She's mentioned you on Twitter as well:

"Someone just submitted some racist crap for the joke competition. I had to refuse to go on if it won. Looking forward to this gig!"

[FURBAR]

What about ..

Slavery reinstated .. BNP disbanded ...
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Fuk um !!

[Redoko]