T-Bone, a classic!

[Suntan Sid]

My office is in a corner block at a, traffic light, controlled cross roads, both roads, are, in effect dual carriageways.

12:08
There was the tell tale screech of rubber on tarmac followed by the, inevitable, thud!
Being of an inquisitive nature I went out, onto our second floor balcony, for a grandstand view.
It would appear that a Mitsubishi Lancer has turned right into the path of a Toyota twin cab.
I grab my fags and settle down for a giggle.
Although there is a filter lane for turning right, the lights are not in a staggered sequence, therefore both parties were either jumping the lights or not!
It just so happened that, there was a police car waiting to cross the junction, so they must have seen everything from start to finish.
We now have two, crashed, cars blocking most of one carriageway, so to help matters the police car joins in the fun and creates an even bigger obstacle.
I should say, at this point, that neither driver, appears to be injured, this is, amply, demonstrated as the, very tall, skinny, bloke, driving the pickup, and the “Weeble” like woman from the Mitsubishi begin gesticulating, shouting and bawling at each other.

12:10
Plod calms them down, there are now 3 cars, 2 plod and 2 angry drivers all on their mobiles in the middle of a 4 way junction.
Plod are showing no interest, whatsoever, in helping the traffic flow through the junction.

12:14
Plod do a disappearing act leaving the two protagonists and their, respective, vehicles in the middle of the junction!
There is a lull in proceedings, cars lorries and bikes are now trying to get around the blockage at the junction. Some of the vehicles, turning right, are going to one side of the crash, some are going the other way round, then meeting up at the other side. I have never seen so many near misses in such a short space of time. Loads of rubber necking, and traffic is building up!

12:16
I go in, to grab a frappe, and then return to the balcony for act 2.

12:22
A second police car arrives, this one parks on the side of the road, we are now back to 2 cars, and 4 people, all on mobiles, in the middle of the junction.
Plod are now checking to see if either of the drivers has a relative serving in the police force, if both do we’re back to square one, if one does and the other doesn’t, blame will be apportioned there and then! It appears that neither party qualifies for special treatment.

12:25
An accident investigator arrives, he parks on the apex of the corner of the junction, he wanders around, apparently, aimlessly taking pictures, then clamps his mobile to his ear.

12:27
Two more accident investigators arrive, from a different company; they have clipboards but no cameras. After shuffling around the cars they both get on their mobiles.
We now have 2 cops, 2 drivers and three accident investigators wandering around, in the middle of an increasingly busy, 4 way junction, all on their mobiles.
Quite a crowd is building up on the pavement diagonally opposite to me, they must all be from the local camera club because they’re all taking pictures.
I light up another fag.
Plod now have their note books out but “Weeble” woman has disappeared, (she’s gone to the bank, I was the only one that noticed).

12:28
One of the accident investigators kicks a tyre, on the Lancer, must be a new investigative technique!

12:29
Police motorcyclist, on large trailie, turns up, circles around wreckage twice then disappears.
Two more people turn up, not sure what their roles are, but they join plod, “matchstick man” and the accident investigators milling around the crash scene, eventually their mobiles are activated.

12:35
“Weeble” woman returns from the bank, and joins the crowd in the middle of the road.
“Plod 1” is talking to “matchstick” man; plod 2 is talking to “Weeble” woman!
A further 2 blokes turn up, and join the, veritable, throng in the middle of the junction.
We now have 12 people milling around two, crashed, cars in the middle of a, still, busy junction, eight of them are on their mobiles.

12:37
Random bloke, with a beard, has taken up a viewing position on the central reservation; he’s on tiptoes trying to see what’s going on.
One of the, unidentified, members of the throng gets into twin cab, reverses it out then drives away.
The full extent of damage to “Weeble” woman’s car is now revealed, front wheel is at 30 degrees from vertical, front wing is totalled as is the front passenger door, some dents in rear passenger door.

12:38
“Plod 1” toe ends a piece of debris accross the road towards the central reservation.

12:41
The crowd begins to disperse, “Weeble” woman, and “matchstick” man are taken to opposite sides of the road and statements are taken.
The Lancer is now a lonely site in the middle of the junction, both plod have lost interest in it!
The removal of the twin cab, and disappearance of “rent a mob” is now allowing the traffic to negotiate the junction with relative ease.

12:51
Plod and “matchstick man” go their separate ways and leave the scene of the crime.
“Weeble” woman is now standing next to, forlorn, Lancer, in the middle of the junction, she has activated her mobile again.

12:55
Tow truck arrives.

12:59
Tow truck leaves with Lancer and “Weeble” woman.

Well, it kept me amused for 51 minutes.

[The Artist]

Nice to see the plod working quickly and efficiently to resolve problems.

[Gone]

Dumb question, but what is a weeble woman?

[pinkyfloyd]

[Suntan Sid]

[Gone]

[DrDonnyBrago]

[Suntan Sid]

[Luke_Retrofly]

I never understand why after a small prang people feel the need to leave their cars in the middle of the fuckign road. Sometimes its quite clear the cars a still drivable, but they'd prefer to stand around on their fucking moblies instead of moving their shit heaps so we can call get home.
____________________
Flounced - Long overdue
Fuck you bitch I'm in the top 10 list I can do the what the fuck I want!

[Poseidon]

[Pickledswede]

Wow, that's a lot of commas... and all in the wrong places!

Sometimes I think there should be some sort of standardised routine laid out by the fuzz or the govt. about what to do after an accident happens. These sort of things seem to happen because nobody knows what they're supposed to do and everyone is wary of doing anything which might make their case harder to fight at a later date (moving cars, leaving the scene etc.)

You would have thought the plod would be a bit more organised though!


-EDIT- Just noticed you're in Cyprus... That explains things a bit!

[Gone]

[Pickledswede]

[Gone]

[Snodvan]

[Suntan Sid]

Unfortunately this is one of the countries where you cannot move your vehicle after an accident and a right, royal, PITA it is.

However I had a minor prang in my car, a priest, of all people, reversed into me.
I tried to get out the way but he still managed to hit me.
Fortunately his car was fooked, all the back lghts were out, my car was had barely a scratch.
I gave him a, very unholy, mouthful, and dared him to ring the police.
He didn't, I drove off, served him right!

[Pickledswede]

[Ben.]

[Ben.]

[Suntan Sid]

Please accept my, sincere apologies for the comma overload!
I am ashamed!

[Gone]

[Suntan Sid]

[warped one]