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| Whosthedaddy |
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 Whosthedaddy Super Spammer
Joined: 11 Dec 2005 Karma :    
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 Posted: 08:49 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: Should you be able to punch dumb people? |
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I mean in as it's your legal right to do so? ____________________ Current : MSX 125 Past : CBR 900RR Monkeybike : c50 LAC : ZXR750 H2 : FZR600 : ZX7R P3 : YW100 : TRX850: Trophy 900 T309 : GSXR 600 L0: Monkeybike : XJ6S Whosthedaddy |
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| DrDonnyBrago |
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 DrDonnyBrago World Chat Champion

Joined: 03 Jan 2010 Karma :   
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| Kwaks |
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 Kwaks I'm not a fast rider

Joined: 28 Jan 2006 Karma :  
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| locked |
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 locked Could Be A Chat Bot

Joined: 22 Oct 2009 Karma :  
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| dodgydog |
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 dodgydog World Chat Champion

Joined: 10 Sep 2009 Karma :  
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 Posted: 09:42 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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Yes
start with Mr *** of Liverpool.
Attempting to deliver the gentleman an American style fridge freezer, see the front door is too small to fit said freezer through. Conversation follows.
Is there another way into the property?
why?
because it will not fit through this door.
why?
because it is too wide to fit through.
why?
this doorway is not big enough to get the appliance through.
can't you unwrap it?
yes, and we can take the doors off the fridge, but it will still be over an inch wider than the doorframe.
but it will fit through wont it?
no sir, I'm afraid it wont.
why?
is there any other access to the property.
why?
so we can try another way to get the appliance inside.
why? it will fit through here wont it?
no sir, it will not.
but that's what I'm asking you, why not?
because sir, the doorway is narrower than the appliance.
why?
try another approach, show the gentleman the tape measure, this sir, is how wide the appliance is, unwrapped, and with the fridge doors removed.
yes?
and this sir, is how wide your doorframe is, as you can see, it is narrower than the appliance we are trying to deliver.
but it will fit through, wont it?
no sir, is there any other access to your property, a back door? patio doors perhaps?
yes, why?
so we can deliver the appliance for you sir.
well this is very inconvenient you know, the man in the shop told us it wouldn't be a problem for you to bring it in the front door.
did you tell him the size of your front door?
no, why?
no reason sir, is there another access to the property sir?
yes, why?
so we can get your fucking fridge in you fuckwitt, (I didn't say that bit out loud)
I think the best thing would be to unwrap the fridge, and bring it in through the front door.
no sir, it will not be the best thing, I have tried to explain to you, it will not fit through the front door, the fridge, this large item here sir, is too wide to fit through this, the small doorway here sir, to summarise for you, IT WILL NOT GO IN THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR. for the love of God, sir, IS THERE ANOTHER WAY IN.
this is very inconvenient you know, the man in the shop told us it wouldn't be a problem.
well he was wrong wasn't he.
pardon?
the man in the shop, he was wrong, it is a problem.
but why?
may I ask what you do for a living sir?
oh yes, of course, I'm a teacher.
Is your wife home sir?
yes she is, do you want to talk to her?
yes, or your fucking pet chimp or rabbit perhaps, anyone, any fucking thing, but you.
Large patio doors to rear of property, fridge delivered, then another waste of five minutes of my life explaining why he needs to sign AND PRINT his name, no, not the date sir, print......fucking print you tosspot.
It ought to be legal to punch these people.
Dog ____________________ I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realise that what you heard is not exactly what I meant |
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| map |
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 map Mr Calendar

Joined: 14 Jun 2004 Karma :     
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| Inkognito |
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 Inkognito Brolly Dolly
Joined: 12 Jun 2004 Karma :     
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 Posted: 10:01 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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That's funny
Reminds me of when i was working at the tech support.
Support: "Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
Customer: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Support: "What sort of trouble?"
Customer: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.",
Support: "Went away?"
Customer:"They disappeared."
Support: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Customer: "Nothing."
Support: "Nothing?"
Customer: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Support: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
Customer: "How do I tell?"
Support: "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"
Customer: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Support: "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
Customer: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Support: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
Customer: "What's a monitor?"
Support: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
Customer: "I don't know."
Support: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
Customer: ......"Yes, I think so."
Support: "Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."
Customer: ......"Yes, it is."
Support: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
Customer: "No."
Support: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Customer: ......"Okay, here it is."
Support: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Customer: "I can't reach."
Support: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
Customer: "No."
Support: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
Customer:"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."
Support: "Dark?
Customer: "Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
Support: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Customer:"I can't."
Support: "No? Why not?"
Customer: "Because there's a power outage."
Support: "A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"
Customer: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Support: "Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Customer: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Support: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Customer: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
Support: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer." |
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| Blau Zedong |
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 Blau Zedong Banned

Joined: 26 Jun 2006 Karma :     
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| Raffles |
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 Raffles World Chat Champion
Joined: 14 Apr 2009 Karma :   
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| dodgydog |
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 dodgydog World Chat Champion

Joined: 10 Sep 2009 Karma :  
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| Blau Zedong |
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 Blau Zedong Banned

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| stonesie |
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 stonesie World Chat Champion

Joined: 04 Jul 2010 Karma :     
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 Posted: 17:42 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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Should I punch myself then, tried to get on my bike on rough ground with the side stand up, and over it went
The bike didn't hit the floor though, my foot took its weight and I managed to grab some railings
Awaits 'cool story bro' |
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| The Shaggy D.A. |
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 The Shaggy D.A. Super Spammer

Joined: 12 Sep 2008 Karma :  
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| stonesie |
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 stonesie World Chat Champion

Joined: 04 Jul 2010 Karma :     
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 Posted: 17:57 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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"i think you should have to pass some kind of mechanical 11+ before you can post in the workshop."
That wouldn't stop the thread-a-day of ''I've got white smoke when the bikes cold................''
Someone told me the head gasket had gone on the CG125 because that was steaming on a damp morning, They got an 'implied facepalm'  |
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| Gone |
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 Gone Nearly there...
Joined: 01 Sep 2010 Karma :     
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| blurredman |
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 blurredman World Chat Champion

Joined: 18 Sep 2010 Karma :   
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 Posted: 18:14 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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How ironic  ____________________ CBT: 12/06/10, Theory: 22/09/10, Module 1: 09/11/10, Module 2: 19/01/11
Past: 1991 Honda CG125BR-J, 1992 (1980) Honda XL125S, 1996 Kawasaki GPZ500S, 1979 MZ TS150.
Current: 1973 MZ ES250/2 - 18k, 1979 Suzuki TS185ER - 10k, 1981 Honda CX500B - 91k, 1987 MZ ETZ250 (295cc) - 40k, 1989 MZ ETZ251 - 51k. |
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| pinkyfloyd |
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 pinkyfloyd Super Spammer

Joined: 20 Jul 2010 Karma :   
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| pug |
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 pug Renault 5 Driver
Joined: 23 Jul 2010 Karma :  
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 Posted: 19:16 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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Oh dear.
I just realised I'm one of the dumb people you all want to punch.
I opened this thread wondering what dumb, as in speech-disabled people,had done that was so annoying.....
...then found out I'm dumb!
Duhhh.  ____________________ choice is for wimps-take the lot. |
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| Wafer_Thin_Ham |
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 Wafer_Thin_Ham Super Spammer

Joined: 18 Nov 2005 Karma :    
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 Posted: 21:08 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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To be honest I probably would have lost the will to live and just left the appliance in his front garden. ____________________ My Flickr |
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| Flip |
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 Flip Super Spammer

Joined: 28 Feb 2004 Karma :  
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| FURBAR |
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 FURBAR Banned

Joined: 04 Apr 2010 Karma :     
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 Posted: 22:11 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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Dumb, but not stupid .. knew i'd get a menstion in this thread ...  ____________________ Fuk um !! |
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| pinkyfloyd |
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 pinkyfloyd Super Spammer

Joined: 20 Jul 2010 Karma :   
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 Posted: 23:19 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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| FURBAR |
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 FURBAR Banned

Joined: 04 Apr 2010 Karma :     
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 Posted: 23:51 - 15 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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 ____________________ Fuk um !! |
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| dodgydog |
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 dodgydog World Chat Champion

Joined: 10 Sep 2009 Karma :  
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 Posted: 18:33 - 16 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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| Big_Ham wrote: |
To be honest I probably would have lost the will to live and just left the appliance in his front garden. |
That thought always crosses my mind, then I remember I have to phone customer services and tell them why there is no access.
They are worse than the customers most times.
Dog ____________________ I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realise that what you heard is not exactly what I meant |
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| mistergixer |
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 mistergixer World Chat Champion

Joined: 15 Jun 2005 Karma :   
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 Posted: 21:20 - 16 Nov 2010 Post subject: |
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| TwoSock wrote: | That's funny
Reminds me of when i was working at the tech support.
Support: "Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
Customer: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Support: "What sort of trouble?"
Customer: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.",
Support: "Went away?"
Customer:"They disappeared."
Support: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Customer: "Nothing."
Support: "Nothing?"
Customer: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Support: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
Customer: "How do I tell?"
Support: "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"
Customer: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Support: "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
Customer: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Support: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
Customer: "What's a monitor?"
Support: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
Customer: "I don't know."
Support: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
Customer: ......"Yes, I think so."
Support: "Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."
Customer: ......"Yes, it is."
Support: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
Customer: "No."
Support: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Customer: ......"Okay, here it is."
Support: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Customer: "I can't reach."
Support: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
Customer: "No."
Support: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
Customer:"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark."
Support: "Dark?
Customer: "Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
Support: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Customer:"I can't."
Support: "No? Why not?"
Customer: "Because there's a power outage."
Support: "A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"
Customer: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Support: "Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Customer: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Support: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Customer: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
Support: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer." |
I think that story pre-dates the invention of computers.
Must have taken you ages to write all that out, you could just have copy pasted it from here.
 ____________________ Space Monkey #7
Don Eladio is dead. His capos are dead. You have no one left to fight for. Fill your pockets and leave in peace. Or fight me and die!
Mistergixer's videos on YouTube |
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Old Thread Alert!
The last post was made 15 years, 67 days ago. Instead of replying here, would creating a new thread be more useful? |
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