POOOO!

[Chalky.]

Don't you just love a good poo?

I've just dropped three cracking logs into the finest porcelain, and feel so free and unbunged!

Nothing better than a nice turd.

Non wipers (ghost poos) are always a bonus.

And you can also do fun things with it, like a koala poo, always fun, and put your poo in peoples freezers.

[Ariel Badger]

A ghost poo is one that hits the water and then disappears, you are thinking of a misers poo.
I am jealous, my pain killers have turned my poo into a big butt plug
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Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

[slyrob]

never put poo in a freezer but a couple of friends piss on my mates jeans and put them in his mums freezer at a party, apparently she thawed them out in the kitchen
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Pitslayer wrote "it could be Ndubz.....ruining this once great place with donkey gobbling loafer knobbing "music".
silky666 wrote "In my eyes, when you shake cocks with the devil, you may as well go for the full reach around"
Villers wrote "as reliable as a ginger stepchild on smack"

[Carl_steveo]

I do love a good poo, nothing better than sitting on the toilet, with a piece of literature and squeezing one out.

Only problem I'm having at the minute is the toilet is too close to the radiator meaning I burn my leg when the heating is on. I have now evolved to using a towel, folded up and put on the radiator. It can still make, what used to be a comfortable experience, quite annoying.

Whats your favourite kind of poo though.

The pressure poo, where you really really need a poo, when you have one the release of pressure is awesome.

The curry poo, where you drop a poo thats not quite solid and not quite liquid it's just sloppy. I tend to have these after an indians.

The bum gravy, kind of explains it all really.

I quite fancy a poo now.
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Current: Honda Nsr 125
Live: Sunderland
Luke "cant be arsed to read your post, but suck my balls anyway."

[N cee thirty]

a hate them poos where its too big to come through ya ass,you end up nearly shitting out your stomach trying to push it out
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'00 Aprilia RS50 > '92 Honda CG > '99 Yamaha Fazer > '91 Yamaha RXS > '79 Suzuki X5 > 01' Honda Cg > 07' Honda Cg > 82' Kawasaki Z200 > suzuki gsxr 400 gk73a > honda vfr 400 NC30 Mod 2 Passed 09/06/2011

Jewlio Iglesias wrote: I actually did vote BNP once

[Nai]

I hate Loch Ness Monsters... So big they wave to you out of the pan and say hello....

[Syris the Indomitable]

My left leg goes numb sometimes when i'm having a proper empty.

According to the World POPClock Projection (U.S. Census Bureau) as of December 30, 2009 at 7:28 GMT there were 6,793,248,608 people on the planet.

So if we say on average people experience bowel movement every other day, (unless you bunged up for a while) this means 3,396,624,304 turds of varying in size and weight enter the earth eco-system every day.
This makes 23,776,370,128 turds per week most of which ends up on the sea floor for bottom feeders to feed off like prawns.

Just think in that one week out of 23,776,370,128 turds, 3.5 of them we mine and 3.5 of them were yours.

All I can say is Thank God for Photosynthesis.
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In Greek mythology Ichor is what immortals have in the place of blood
Those that mind, don't matter...Those that matter, don't mind. Do you agree with this?

[Chalky.]

lol @ photosynthesis!

It was a pressure poo that drove me to this thread, on the phone to someone who shouldn't really hear the plops, but in the end had to!

In Germany there are funny toilets where the poo lands on a ledge, because in days gone by they used to sift through their logs to see what was what

[Skudd]

I have a poo every morning at 05.30hr whether I'm up or not. You can set your clock by it. Haven't had a hard poo for years, all mine are like thick brown porridge.
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Famous last words of Humpty Dumpty. " Stop pushing me "
Petty Anarchists look at "1984".............. The Visionary looks at "Animal Farm".

[pepperami]

I know what you mean about the pain-killers making your poo into a bit of a but plug Mr Ariel .
I`m having the same issue .

Just lately I have had a wide variety of poos
I have had ghost poos, Loch Ness monsters, large boulders that almost dont need a wipe as they are that hard & dry.
And after a particulaly nasty kebab, a good old scatter/splatter gun jobbie

I dont have any vices apart from BCF and having a poo, so half of my lifes entertainment is in this single thread
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I am the sum total of my own existence, what went before makes me who I am now!

[Chalky.]

My anal beard is a bit sticky, I didn't wipe very well

[L4Isoside]

[Syris the Indomitable]

[bikertomm]

My shits are fucking huge. You would not believe they came out of my body

I need to drink more or something!


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07' Honda Hornet now full powaah! My guide on performing an oil change!

[ajbsmirnoff]

I love my daily mid morning poo at work.

Funded by my employer, free wifi, free toilet paper, and the electric air freshener thing makes it a fragrant experience.


edited for my drunken inability to spell eclectic

[Carl_steveo]

[pinkyfloyd]

https://i429.photobucket.com/albums/qq13/HiTeck1979/OmenShitThread-1.jpg
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illuminateTHEmind wrote: I am just more evolved than most of you guys... this allows me to pick of things quickly which would have normally taken the common man years to master
Hockeystorm65:.well there are childish arguments...there are very childish arguments.....there are really stupid childish arguments and now there are......Pinkfloyd arguments!
Teflon-Mike:I think I agree with just about all Pinky has said.

[Ariel Badger]

I am a four a day man without the painkillers.
I hate feeling two day old food fighting to get out, I like to feel the burn of yesterdays chillis in the morning
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Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

[aha-shake]

At LEAST three a day every day.

It's only natural..

And it also means you can finish a good book in a couple of days.

Shake

[ajbsmirnoff]

You love the smell of chilli in the morning. It smells like victory ?

[Ariel Badger]

[warped one]

I had the unfortunate time, of having a poo on the plane back from Tallinn when we hit turbulence, and got a squidgy sticky one all over my bum

Note to self never poo on a plane.
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amnesia - Never in the history of usernames has one been more accurate. Warped indeed. You sir are a fecking oddball.

[L4Isoside]

I used to be an every other day person, now I'm everyday

[Stelmer]

I've been doing pressure poos recently. Them ones which erupt, covering the toilet when the pressure behind them becomes too great...

These ones seem to weld themselves to the toilet too which is not fun...

[-LG-]

I can go days without pooing sometimes, other times I got every day. It has to be at home, I've only been twice on another toilet in 4 years...once at work when I had the shits...spent a good 40 minutes on there...not bad as my shift was only 4 hours long. Another time was in Bulgaria, mate who I was sharing a room with decided to stay out on the slopes, so I took the chance to get the bus back and take a crap...managed to block the toilet up! Was trying to get it to flush before anyone came back xD.

I'm always blocking the toilet here, I can have huge ones that just don't bloody flush! Thank god for the bog cleaning thing by the side!