Snail Tossing

[Serendipity]

No, not some sort of niche bestiality, but the art of competitive mollusc relocation.

Been raining down my way so the slimy little feckers are out in force. Just got home and saw a couple sneaking across the path so I thought I’d check on the veg…

…by god they were all over the place, even climbing up the bean poles!!!

Needless to say the air was soon thick with invertebrates.

I feel a warm glow knowing that I have introduced some of our more Earth-bound creatures to the pleasure of flying. My feelings about the landing part are a little hazier.

How far can you get yours? I reckon I only managed the equivalent of about 3 gardens (I threw them into scrubland behind the house rather than into my neighbours’ gardens). It’s a quiet night so you can hear them land. Go on give it a go.
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2007 CBF1000 & 2016 CBF1000F - Commuter heaven | 1994 CBR600FR - Awaiting defibrillation

[ThoughtContro...]

They'll be back, and your veg will get ravaged.

Beer traps, can't be beaten.
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Prize cunt
--
"In a world of universal deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act" - George Orwell

[Shaft]

Collect them up, purge them for a couple of days, then get your own back and eat the buggers, lightly fried in garlic butter.


Yum yum!!
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Things get better with age; I'm close to being magnificent........
20 RE Interceptor, 83 Z1100A3, 83 GS650 Katana
WooHoo, I'm a Man Point Millionaire! https://www.bikechatforums.com/viewtopic.php?t=234035

[ThoughtContro...]

None of your froggy habits here.

This is England. We eat tripe, black puddings, mushy peas and other nourishing wholesome foods, not that disgusting foreign muck

[/Me_Nan_Mode]
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Prize cunt
--
"In a world of universal deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act" - George Orwell

[yambabe]

Just step on the buggers. Result = dead mollusc and you get a really satisfying crunchy noise as well.
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Sod falling in love, I wanna fall in chocolate.

[colin1]

I used to have a problem with snails in my garden, but since birds have taken to nesting in trees in my garden, any snails get gobbled up.
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colin1 is officially faster than god

[Fairies attack]

We used to have the little buggers round my way all the time.
But since washing 2stroke exhaust out with caustic soda, and collecting the little shits in the bucket with it in the seem to have stopped.

I love stepping on them, it gives me pleasure knwing they aren't eating the plants.

[Hetzer]

Ours get flung hard against a wall.
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"There's the horizon! Ride hard, ride fast and cut down all who stand in your way!"

[CarlosCBR]

You can get a good 50-60 metres easy with a good sized snail. Although you dont get to hear the "crack" as they hit the floor as they land so far away.

When we were kids we used to turn them upside down and pour salt into the slimy section and one lad used to try cut their eye storks off with scissors!
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OPv5mDPQ14

https://www.facebook.com/carl.simmonds.7

[Howling TerrorOutOfOffice]

I liberate mine via 'Nosey Noel's' garden.
I use a builders trowel to aid freedom.
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Diabolical homemade music Bandcamp and Soundcloud
Singer songwriter, Artist and allround good bloke Listen to Andrew Susan Johnston here
The Harry Turner Project

[pinkyfloyd]

Feed them beer, It gets the plastered and they fall off walls!

I had a knock at the door once. Opened the door and no one there, as I was about to close it I noticed a snail on the doorstep so I picked it up and threw it down the garden. A week later I was chilling and heard a knock at the door. Went out to look and a snail was sitting on the door step. Just as I was about to pick it up the thing looked at me and said "What did you do that for?"
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illuminateTHEmind wrote: I am just more evolved than most of you guys... this allows me to pick of things quickly which would have normally taken the common man years to master
Hockeystorm65:.well there are childish arguments...there are very childish arguments.....there are really stupid childish arguments and now there are......Pinkfloyd arguments!
Teflon-Mike:I think I agree with just about all Pinky has said.

[pinkyfloyd]

Ooh double post. Sorry nothing to see here!
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illuminateTHEmind wrote: I am just more evolved than most of you guys... this allows me to pick of things quickly which would have normally taken the common man years to master
Hockeystorm65:.well there are childish arguments...there are very childish arguments.....there are really stupid childish arguments and now there are......Pinkfloyd arguments!
Teflon-Mike:I think I agree with just about all Pinky has said.

[mistergixer]

[Ariel Badger]

Tossing is not good enough
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Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

[The Shaggy D.A.]

https://www.military-kit.co.uk/images/barnett_black_widow_catapult.jpg
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Chances are quite high you are not in my Monkeysphere, and I don't care about you. Don't take it personally.
Currently : Royal Enfield 350 Meteor
Previously : CB100N > CB250RS > XJ900F > GT550 > GPZ750R/1000RX > AJS M16 > R100RT > Bullet 500 > CB500 > LS650P > Bullet Electra X & YBR125 > Bullet 350 "Superstar" & YBR125 Custom > Royal Enfield Classic 500 Despatch Limited Edition (28 of 200) & CB Two-Fifty Nighthawk > ER5

[Howling TerrorOutOfOffice]

^^^Big Tosser.
____________________
Diabolical homemade music Bandcamp and Soundcloud
Singer songwriter, Artist and allround good bloke Listen to Andrew Susan Johnston here
The Harry Turner Project

[The Shaggy D.A.]

You should see my right forearm muscles
____________________
Chances are quite high you are not in my Monkeysphere, and I don't care about you. Don't take it personally.
Currently : Royal Enfield 350 Meteor
Previously : CB100N > CB250RS > XJ900F > GT550 > GPZ750R/1000RX > AJS M16 > R100RT > Bullet 500 > CB500 > LS650P > Bullet Electra X & YBR125 > Bullet 350 "Superstar" & YBR125 Custom > Royal Enfield Classic 500 Despatch Limited Edition (28 of 200) & CB Two-Fifty Nighthawk > ER5

[Serendipity]

[Robby]

Just put up a few bird feeders. The birds will get used to coming to your garden, and they'll eat the snails.

Or, beer trap + snails + birds = drunk birds. Everyone loves a drunk bird.

[The Shaggy D.A.]

Or you could put up "Snails keep out" signs all around the garden, and put a load of dead snails on cocktail sticks around the border to warn them off.
____________________
Chances are quite high you are not in my Monkeysphere, and I don't care about you. Don't take it personally.
Currently : Royal Enfield 350 Meteor
Previously : CB100N > CB250RS > XJ900F > GT550 > GPZ750R/1000RX > AJS M16 > R100RT > Bullet 500 > CB500 > LS650P > Bullet Electra X & YBR125 > Bullet 350 "Superstar" & YBR125 Custom > Royal Enfield Classic 500 Despatch Limited Edition (28 of 200) & CB Two-Fifty Nighthawk > ER5

[The Artist]

Why not the obvious, get a bottle of salt and go round the edge of the garden with it.

[Serendipity]

[Hetzer]

An old snail classic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3q0XyGCexs
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"There's the horizon! Ride hard, ride fast and cut down all who stand in your way!"

[Shaft]

[DrDonnyBrago]

PVC pipe + compressed air line = snailzooka


Alternatively

PVC pipe, carb cleaner and a lighter = flaming snailzooka