You ever get the feeling karma is a twisted bitch... ?

[Visitor Q]

Just a consideration I've had. When I was younger, say 16-22, I was a very proud bastard.

Now, trying to be good and 'hold my tongue', I seem to be getting nowhere. I'm happier in my self, and my confidence built, but now I struggle to get on with anyone. Occasionally I get to be my normal cantankerous self, but generally I sit and behave these days.

I'm starting to feel that Thailand neutered me, but I'm just guessing if anyone else has had this issue.

I got told I needed to change my personality by everyone (including most on here), yet now, I feel like I've lost a big part of my 'mojo' or self.

Bah. Maybe it's the booze.
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...

[GF-91]

Sounds like you need to MTFU. If you don't like the way you're acting, dont do it. Simples.
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One dream, one soul, one prize, one goal.

[Hetzer]

You can pretty much be who you want, so long as you are without gratuitous malice, and from that position of righteous strength fcuk what anyone else says.

You'll change over time anyway, as does everyone. And that's one of the freakiest things about personality; as the years go by you are not the person you were, even while you are.
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"There's the horizon! Ride hard, ride fast and cut down all who stand in your way!"

[Visitor Q]

Ok, perhaps I wasn't clear enough.

Recently I stopped whoring about, being verbally aggressive, and tried to share the wealth a bit.

All in half measures perhaps (I'm not mormon yet), but trying to shape myself into a 'better person' has distanced me even further from my fellow man...

And I'm not sure I know the road back either.

MTFU I can do.
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...

[silky666]

[Clanger]

Time Causes Change.
The older you get the more mellow you become, because you realise there is just no point in wasting so much time on being uptight, agitated or bitter or opinionated or aggressive or depressed.

You become more comfortable with the skin you're in.

You mooch about not really giving two hoots what other people think about you; the only thing that matters is what you think about you.

You have to live with yourself and your thoughts and your body, so it's best if you make it as comfortable and easy as you can.

Maybe you are going through a shift in values, that is totally fine... as most people are brought up and molded into their family values, it's only when you break free you realise, actually this is not really me...I'm something else, I value different things.

Change is not always a bad thing.
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Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter won't mind - Dr. Seuss

[Visitor Q]

Wow, one day I will start a thread when I'm sober.

I wouldn't say I really give a shit parse, for instance I've now switched to incredibly gay extra-slim cigarettes that make me look like Cruella Devil. Whenever I offer somebody one of them it's always 'would you like an incredibly effeminate cigarette?'.

During Africa I 'grew up' a lot, and became a lot more confident and comfortable with myself. Then, I went to Thailand.

Now, I just feel like all my lonely introspection over the year, and decisions to 'be a better person' have warped my personality such that I feel weak/out of place everywhere. Like I'd rather drink at home and chortle at my self then go out and deal with people, even if I like several of them (but not all).

Clanger, I know change is good, which is why I keep moving so much. But I like to be in control of it.
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...

[thegubner]

I see the problem here, it's not your karma thats twisted it's your subframe. Punch it in the tits.

[Visitor Q]

[Fawbish]

Know what you mean. I was brought up to be an altruistic motherfucker, but with the background knowledge of 'anyone fucks with you - destroy them'.

It's a weird mixture but I just let whatever I feel to be right happen, doesnt usually lead me too far astray.

For instance, I'm a nice guy, but that usually means people's view of me isn't 'friendly' half the time, it's 'he's a nice guy, he wont mind' - and that usually ends up in the people around me perhaps not having a high amount of respect for me. I'm talking strangers and immediate respect here.

On the other hand, I used to go out on the rugby pitch and be handed respect on a plate - everyone used to watch this little waif make ridiculous painful tackle after tackle, control entire sets, then take the ball forward and win us games.

Inbetween, sometimes I hate people, and act like so - though I draw the line, like Hetzer says, being deliberately malicious in act. I dont like the idea of someone hurting with no provocation. And sometimes I'm loved up and will be more generous than anyone else I know, without a drink.

I dunno what I'm trying to say, I suppose - why do you think you're limited to a small tunnel of personality? Lot's of people know me as different personalities, but the people who matter know about all of me. *shrugs*



Remember, what the majority classes as 'better' is still just a ridiculous definition. Be yourself, tit-features, we cant be anyone else.
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"Oh....it looks like Average Joe's is forfeiting the match!" - "Yeah, its a risky strategy but lets see if it pays off for 'em Cotton."

[Visitor Q]

Well, around 8 months ago I started a job in Thailand and avoided drinking for 2 months. Trying to come across professional and lovely.

Went completely off the deep end from that, and came to the conclusion of 'better to be a first class you, then a second class someone else'... which is cool.

But, when I was younger I didn't really treat anyone with respect, was loud and obnoxious, and generally (on paper) not particularly likeable. I was also a big fatty.

So, trying to change the parts of me I can do, I've got myself fit (well, except in the last three months... not fat and still running, but drink and smoke every night) and trying to act respectfully to everyone. Trying not to man whore about so much (the number is more than high enough, and I'm after 'big game' now, so to speak) and yet I'm finding social situations awkward now. Perhaps before I used to rule them, whereas now I let them develop alone and then get annoyed by stupidity, which then makes me seem less approachable.

Or maybe I was just in a very bitchy introspective mood last night. Ah well, run from small victory to small victory. The devil fan everyone simply put up with in our flat (sounded like a helicopter) broke fully today, and I fixed it for 50p and it's sat next to me purring away silently... just in time for the new guys arrival in the room with no air con. I got a kilo of intestines for under 2 quid, and I'm going to cook half of it today for funsies.

I still take pride in everything I do, and have personal confidence in that respect. But I guess I am just getting confused by how trying to be a better person across the board is making my life so much less... rewarding. At least socially. I've never tolerated fools, and now I'm trying to (/being made to) and it's not sitting all that comfortably.

Grr, arse.
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...

[mad4it028]

im a bit like you i think
i speak my mind no matter what , this oftern offends but i cant help myself
because of this im not a very likable chap , it used to bother me so i tryed to change this got me alot more friends but fuck they annoyed the shit out of me so i soon reverted to my old ways and came to the conclution i dont like people and alot of people dont like me, im fine with this i have very few friends but the few i do have are very good friends, i guess im just a victor meldew but hey i like it that way and i still dont like people..lol
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always looking to buy bikes crashed ,unfinished projects,none runners pm me
currently riding kawasaki z1000 only bike ive ever loved

[Visitor Q]

[mad4it028]

my spelling sucks i earn a very good living fuck it
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always looking to buy bikes crashed ,unfinished projects,none runners pm me
currently riding kawasaki z1000 only bike ive ever loved

[scorps]

that all seems rather complicated, interesting read though, Ive lived my life on the simple basis of treating others how Id like to be treated. Those who try to take the piss get binned off, I will always get my fingers burned to a degree but I have learned how to just let stuff go and not become too cynical.

I have decided that on the whole people arent important enough for me to stress over stuff, unless my family is hurt in any way then all that goes out the window and I happily become thug grandma, this is a very rare occurance though
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Do not presume that I am male.

[colin1]

I think growing up and becoming aware of the benefits of not being obnoxious, is a good thing.

However, the benefits are limited, so the key is to be like a tory politician (im including tory blair), and appear to not be obnoxious while actually being selfish and obnoxious.

It's stealth selfish. All the power from being selfish, while all the benefits from appearing to not be obnoxious.

Beware of the pitfalls of assuming that anyone who has not 'travelled' is a lesser mortal though.
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colin1 is officially faster than god

[Rogerborg]

Still living off the trust fund, eh?
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Biking is 1/20th as dangerous as horse riding.
GONE: HN125-8, LF-250B, GPz 305, GPZ 500S, Burgman 400 // RIDING: F650GS (800 twin), Royal Enfield Bullet Electra 500 AVL, Ninja 250R because racebike

[Visitor Q]

[Deckx]

Sounds like you're turning gay.... or maybe tranny

[Hetzer]

[Visitor Q]

[cornish]

I agree with Clanger, be happy with yourself and ignore what others think of you.

It may be that the clicky crowd who all drink together are just pandering to each other. In a foreign country they are, as you pointed out, banding together for survival. It is most likely with people they wouldn't touch with a barge pole at home because they have no other options available and lack the ability to be happy if they are not part of a group. They may all have the urge to jump up and shout 'you're all a bunch of cnuts' at random junctures, but they choose to ignore it to fit in and get whatever it is they need from being part of a group.

If you don't need this validation and are happy in yourself don't stress about it. If it does your head in being with them don't bother. As long as you are not going out of your way to be obnoxious, who cares if people think you are a cranky old bastard.
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smile and be happy. . . .it gets right on everyone's tits!

[Visitor Q]

Very true, but my last school I had /no/ white friends.

That can get lonely amongst the Asians who refuse any kind of physical contact.

I miss hugs maaaaaaaaaaaan.
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China traffic/travel bike vid - When I make a sweeping statement, please add the word 'statistically' in to the sentence before you bitch...
From September 2014 to January/February 2015 I will not be using any English, nor reading any. As such, I won't be on here. PM at will, but I won't be checking/posting unless in emergencies. Certainly not for the first couple of months. Please berate me savagely if I break that rule...