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Mod 2 - Failed. Bastard Elephant! :(

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gooner_47
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Joined: 28 Jun 2011
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PostPosted: 20:16 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Mod 2 - Failed. Bastard Elephant! :( Reply with quote

OK, so before I begin I want to make this clear - I expect no smart arse comments or derogatory remarks about my riding ability. I ride like a boss. FACT.

So out on my mod 2, I am approaching a roundabout. The examiner instructs me to take the third exit. No big deal I think to myself, I've got over 4 years riding experience under my belt, this is a piece of piss.

Well wouldn't you Adam and Eve it, there's only an ELEPHANT blocking one of the lanes. I mean this fucker was big, and I'm not going to lie to you guys, it was a bit of a distraction. I've made this handy paint sketch to show you the situation:

https://img810.imageshack.us/img810/4089/elephantsketch.png

I think you'll agree my drawing abilities are also unrivalled.

Naturally I reacted like any sane, rational person would.... I swerved to the right (brilliantly managing to avoid Nelly), careered over the middle of the roundabout, catching mad air in the process and landing on a granny on the pavement on the other side.

The examiner failed me for this, apparently it was unsafe or something, I dunno.

Now, what I'd like to know from you fine people is:

- How do I go about making a formal complaint against this examiner, who totally failed me unfairly cause like, hello... it wasn't my fault at all?!

- How do I go about suing Africa for somehow allowing one of their elephants to have free reign over my local roundabout.

- How do i go about getting compensation from Doris for being in blatently the wrong position, on the pavement of all places! Although, in fairness, she did provide a soft landing.
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WannaBeDude
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PostPosted: 20:19 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

PICS OR GTFO, DID'NT HAPPEN !
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shereen
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PostPosted: 20:28 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

Did the bike roll backwards though? If it did than you should make a complaint. Cool
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swampy
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PostPosted: 20:29 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

covdude wrote:
PICS OR GTFO, DID'NT HAPPEN !


Is the above paint diagram not proof in itself.....

OP, you'll get it next time fella.... Thumbs Up




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SnowTigeress
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PostPosted: 20:33 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Re: Mod 2 - Failed. Bastard Elephant! :( Reply with quote

gooner_47 wrote:
OK, so before I begin I want to make this clear - I expect no smart arse comments or derogatory remarks about my riding ability. I ride like a boss. FACT.

So out on my mod 2, I am approaching a roundabout. The examiner instructs me to take the third exit. No big deal I think to myself, I've got over 4 years riding experience under my belt, this is a piece of piss.

Well wouldn't you Adam and Eve it, there's only an ELEPHANT blocking one of the lanes. I mean this fucker was big, and I'm not going to lie to you guys, it was a bit of a distraction. I've made this handy paint sketch to show you the situation:

https://img810.imageshack.us/img810/4089/elephantsketch.png

I think you'll agree my drawing abilities are also unrivalled.

Naturally I reacted like any sane, rational person would.... I swerved to the right (brilliantly managing to avoid Nelly), careered over the middle of the roundabout, catching mad air in the process and landing on a granny on the pavement on the other side.

The examiner failed me for this, apparently it was unsafe or something, I dunno.

Now, what I'd like to know from you fine people is:

- How do I go about making a formal complaint against this examiner, who totally failed me unfairly cause like, hello... it wasn't my fault at all?!

- How do I go about suing Africa for somehow allowing one of their elephants to have free reign over my local roundabout.

- How do i go about getting compensation from Doris for being in blatently the wrong position, on the pavement of all places! Although, in fairness, she did provide a soft landing.



Well i think Mod 1 should be at the local zoo swerving round elephants and the elderly.....

fuck me you have elephants to round up the trolleys........... i have to make do with YTS people

Sod sheep dog trials, trolley boy trials, elephant trials sound so much more exciting
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TheSmiler: binning it is better than going around a roundabout the wrong way


Last edited by SnowTigeress on 20:35 - 15 Aug 2011; edited 1 time in total
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lllN30lll
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PostPosted: 20:33 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

when the examiner told you to take the 3rd exit, he actually should have said the half past 1 exit ( 1:30, or 1330 If you're a military commando like myself) He should have stated 1:30 or 1330 or even abbreviated it to "Dinnertime exit" clearly over your cup and string communication device.

You may have a claim there.


Last edited by lllN30lll on 20:35 - 15 Aug 2011; edited 1 time in total
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joshdudeha
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PostPosted: 20:35 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

Personally I wouldn't blame it on the elephant, I'd blame it on the examiner. Rolling Eyes
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Teflon-Mike
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PostPosted: 20:50 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Re: Mod 2 - Failed. Bastard Elephant! :( Reply with quote

gooner_47 wrote:
Now, what I'd like to know from you fine people is:

- How do I go about making a formal complaint against this examiner, who totally failed me unfairly cause like, hello... it wasn't my fault at all?!


He's a petti-official, a pawn of a corrupt psuedo fascist system on the brink of collapse. The official complaints procedure is merely there to punish further any-one that deigns to challenge thier authority.

Just follow him home; smash in his front windows; ride your bike into his living room, bitch slap him into submission; do his missus up the garry, then nick his 42" Plasma screen TV.....

gooner_47 wrote:
- How do I go about suing Africa for somehow allowing one of their elephants to have free reign over my local roundabout.


Now FIRST you have to establish it's actually an AFRICAN elephant, and THEN how it came to be in this country.... I mean it may be on a valid Political Asylum Visa, in which case you would have to challenge the UK Gov't.

If it was a three legged land mine victim, claiming Disability Living allowances; good chance you will have less legs to stand on that it does in court, they would simply argue that it was blatent racism and persecution of a disfranchisement minority, and it ought to be blatantly obvious to any-one that the elephant couldn't have gone the right way round the roundabout, due to asymmetrical drive train layout, hence your fault NOT making appropriate accommodation for disability

But, back to the Elephant's ethnicity; it's down to the ear's I believe; Asian elephants are smaller. Well known fact, African Elephants have Big-Ears.... because Noddy Holder, unfortunately isn't connected to the African Libation Front, and Bob Geldoff, wouldn't help him promote a charity record, to raise the ransom.

However, I think its a long shot, either which way, due to the 1978, 'Python vs Barrat' precedent where ruling went against the collective action of residence claiming for damage to their homes from random elephants falling from their lofts....

gooner_47 wrote:
- How do i go about getting compensation from Doris for being in blatently the wrong position, on the pavement of all places! Although, in fairness, she did provide a soft landing.


The soft landing she provided, would seriously minimise the amount of compensation that might be claimed, unfortunately.

Your best bet, will be to talk to a specialist 'no-win-no-fee' solicitor on the specifics of the topic.

Did Dorris bleed much? This can help, you can claim for dry cleaning bills. Similarly, if you scared the shit out of her, you may b able to sue under medical law, for non-payment of treatments; in this case laxativ theropy. There are many such clauses in the billions of utterly useless statutes of English law, but you rally need an expert to help you find them all.
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mjn51
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PostPosted: 20:54 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

I would like to point out from your most lucid drawing, that the elephant is clearly an Indian elephantand not African.
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Hyaon
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PostPosted: 20:57 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

You clearly should have brought a mouse to move said elephant out of your way.

You only have yourself to blame.
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Daytona Paul
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PostPosted: 21:04 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hyaon wrote:
You clearly should have brought a mouse to move said elephant out of your way.

You only have yourself to blame.


^^^^ Is, of course, the correct answer.

Your Instructor is to blame, not the elephant or the examiner, Hazard Perception should have been fully covered on your CBT Sad

Report him immediately to the DSA.

Very Happy
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Moxey
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PostPosted: 21:26 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

Was it an Indian Elephant or an African Elephant? Gives us a sense of scale ya see.
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Germ
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PostPosted: 21:27 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

Doesn't the examination centre have to provide 24 days notice if they intend including elephant avoidance manouvres as part of the test criteria?
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gooner_47
Two Stroke Sniffer



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PostPosted: 21:29 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

None of you seem to be taking this seriously....

GIVE ME SYMPATHY!
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Daytona Paul
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PostPosted: 21:32 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

gooner_47 wrote:


GIVE ME SYMPATHY!


A gooner asking for sympathy Smile
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waffles
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PostPosted: 21:38 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

Was the elephant using the roundabout correctly and signalling for its exit? If so, then you should have read the road better and anticipated that there may have been a large animal blocking your path.

I doubt you would be able to blame this on the examiner unless he told you to accelerate up to 88mph and you accidentally travelled through time.

I edited this to make me look less of a spack. Hopefully nobody will notice!
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Last edited by waffles on 22:37 - 15 Aug 2011; edited 1 time in total
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Rogerborg
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PostPosted: 22:27 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's a European elephant - look at the way it's carrying its coconut.

Also, I'm reliably informed by another practically perfect person that it's not an examiner who tests you, it's an instructor. Get your facts straight. Rolling Eyes
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Pedro
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PostPosted: 22:29 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

waffles wrote:
I doubt you would be able to blame this on the instructor


Examiner! Unless your instructor didn't train you for large animals in the road.

Was the Elephant road legal?
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SnowTigeress
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PostPosted: 22:54 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

https://i1177.photobucket.com/albums/x349/snowtigeress/Bellmap.jpg

Bit of Advice needed if i was on my mod 2 test and came across this roundabout.and the examiner told me straight on,if i went straight on into the pub would he give me a pass cert if i buy him a drink?
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Mehty
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PostPosted: 22:55 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

I wish i had some damn Karma for you!
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gooner_47
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PostPosted: 23:38 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

Daytona Paul wrote:
gooner_47 wrote:


GIVE ME SYMPATHY!


A gooner asking for sympathy Smile


We may need it this season mate! Wink haha

Oh and all the rest of you, you're all wrong. Anything you said, you're wrong and I'm right - because I'm great.

Apart from SnowTigeress, she knows where her priorities lie.... in getting pissed up during the middle of the test and bribing the examiner with alcamahol. This is the correct path to greatness.
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Andy_Pagin
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PostPosted: 23:52 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

I can't believe elephant avoidance wasn't covered on your cbt, it should have been discussed after unicycling walruses ffs!

Also dvla classify elephants as hgvs, did you even think to check its tacho? If its out of hours you'd have a case against the rider.
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SnowTigeress
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PostPosted: 23:59 - 15 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

I forgot to ask was this here Elephant pink by any chance?
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Carl_steveo
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PostPosted: 02:30 - 16 Aug 2011    Post subject: Reply with quote

That wasn't an elephant you crazy people...........................that's my mother-in-law.
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