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Moments that make you look like a imbecile [2012]

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Hyaon
Traffic Copper



Joined: 14 Sep 2010
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PostPosted: 17:18 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Moments that make you look like a imbecile [2012] Reply with quote

Today I'm in slow moving traffic, just about to go past the petrol station and notice someone in opposite direction waiting to turn into the station. I'm one of those karma believers, so I like to give way rather than hog an extra 2 metres of road and block people off.

I stop and give my 'yeah, go ahead mate' jedi wave of the hand,
simultaneously hitting the kill switch on the right handle bar.

Sigh.

Your turn.
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Knightsy
World Chat Champion



Joined: 21 Jun 2012
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PostPosted: 17:21 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

False neutral when I'm trying to accelerate... Embarassed
ALWAYS happens when you need it (like pulling out from a cock in 4x4)
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Hyaon
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Joined: 14 Sep 2010
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PostPosted: 17:25 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

Knight wrote:
False neutral when I'm trying to accelerate... Embarassed
ALWAYS happens when you need it (like pulling out from a cock in 4x4)


'Yeah yeah, second gear and! *RRRRRRRRRRMMMM!* *slows down* F..."

Yep Im a victim of that sometimes.
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thepuma
World Chat Champion



Joined: 16 Jul 2012
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PostPosted: 17:26 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

The first time I'd ever taken my bike to put petrol in I was there AGES!

Not only of the palava taking helmet off then gloves so I can find my credit card in my jacket. But mainly the fact that I just couldn't get the bloody petrol to go in the tank. Soon as I squeezed the nozzle...'click'....and again 'click...click'...Had to squeeze it gently to get any petrol in and it felt like it took 5 minutes getting £7 worth of bloody petrol in!

Since realised its best to hold the nozzle slightly out and at an angle!
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billytwomirro...
Nova Slayer



Joined: 22 Jan 2012
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PostPosted: 17:28 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

When i had my enfield hitting the rev limiter.
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The Shaggy D.A.
Super Spammer



Joined: 12 Sep 2008
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PostPosted: 17:44 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

New helmet, out for a ride, used built in sun visor, everything goes blurry.

Had the advertising plastic still on it.

billytwomirrors wrote:
When i had my enfield hitting the rev limiter.


Enfields have rev limiters?
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Chances are quite high you are not in my Monkeysphere, and I don't care about you. Don't take it personally.
Currently : Royal Enfield 350 Meteor
Previously : CB100N > CB250RS > XJ900F > GT550 > GPZ750R/1000RX > AJS M16 > R100RT > Bullet 500 > CB500 > LS650P > Bullet Electra X & YBR125 > Bullet 350 "Superstar" & YBR125 Custom > Royal Enfield Classic 500 Despatch Limited Edition (28 of 200) & CB Two-Fifty Nighthawk > ER5
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swampy
World Chat Champion



Joined: 04 Aug 2004
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PostPosted: 17:47 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

Knight wrote:
False neutral when I'm trying to accelerate... Embarassed
ALWAYS happens when you need it (like pulling out from a cock in 4x4)


At this risk of sounding like tef mike, surely if you're going from 1st to 2nd and hit neutral, it's not "false", it's just neutral, saying its a false neutral is just an effort to make oneself look less of a tit Wink
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"Faster, faster, faster, until the thrill of speed overcomes the fear of death..." Hunter S Thompson
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Andy_Pagin
World Chat Champion



Joined: 08 Nov 2010
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PostPosted: 17:49 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

After stopping to get petrol on the way home from picking up my new (used) Fazer, spending ten minutes trying to start it, then remembering it's got an immobiliser. Embarassed
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Turks
Nova Slayer



Joined: 20 Jun 2011
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PostPosted: 17:50 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

I was at a set of traffic lights a few months ago, saw a group of kids with their mother on the other side of the lights. One of the boys started waving, I gave it about 10 seconds thought, but the kid was still furiously waving and jumping. I raised my hand and gave the cheesiest wave possible right at the moment the father (presumably) walked past next to me waving and smiling at the kid.

I also went to the local biker shops in my new leathers with the labels still attached and flapping about in the wind. Embarassed
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Banger
Trackday Trickster



Joined: 25 Apr 2010
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PostPosted: 18:14 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

Couple of years back I pulled into the forecourt of a bike shop in Tonbridge on my previous R1. Zorst was roaring and the bike steaming from a good hoon there and I was dressed lid to boots in my then matching power ranger gear . . . .

No, thats not the worst of it . . I wish.

Pulled up, flicked side stand down and went to get off bike.

Yeah, you know, the fooking stand wasn't down and me and my bike took a trip to the concrete. Brick Wall

Damage was minimal due to me selflessly sticking lots of my ample body between the bike and the floor.

The icing on the cake though was the 2 young lads sat, cleaning bike parts for a bit of pocket money that saw the whole thin ! Rolling Eyes

They both managed to stifle the hysteria untill I came out of the shop and told them they were doing better than I would have done in their position. . . . . I have not been laughed at that hard by anyone in my life . . while still dressed anyway. Embarassed
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hedgehugger
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Joined: 03 Nov 2007
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PostPosted: 18:17 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

Riding home on my new-to-me bike and it dies about a mile from home.
Panic, omg, wtf moment. Phoning home, then it dawns on me.....
reserve!
Had forgotten what you need to do without fuel-injection!
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Llama-Farmer
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Joined: 23 Jan 2012
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PostPosted: 18:37 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

A few weeks ago test riding my friends bike that I'm buying. It's been months since I had ridden anything due to a bad elbow injury, so I was "getting back into it" anyway, but on a completely new bike.

His pegs and levers are all in the wrong position for me, so I kept going to change from 2nd to 3rd and would end up staying in 2nd, letting the clutch back out (as my left hand is only a semi-conscious operation) and lurching like a fool. Got used to it after a while, but didn't half make me look silly especially if I was giving it a bit of beans.

Also the side stand needs greasing and feels in a weird place, and the key is really fiddly to open the fuel cap, so pulling up in the petrol station it was about a minute before I got off the bike then another minute before I managed to open the cap.
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Rogerborg
nimbA



Joined: 26 Oct 2010
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PostPosted: 19:34 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Shaggy D.A. wrote:
billytwomirrors wrote:
When i had my enfield hitting the rev limiter.

Enfields have rev limiters?

I believe when the valves come out of the exhaust, that's the signal to limit your revs.

Haven't had a proper clot-moment on my own bikes yet, but dropping my workmate's band new just-ridden-out-of-the-showroom Bandit at 0mph hasn't been the highlight of my biking career to date. Doh!
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Knightsy
World Chat Champion



Joined: 21 Jun 2012
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PostPosted: 19:46 - 23 Aug 2012    Post subject: Reply with quote

Andy_Pagin wrote:
After stopping to get petrol on the way home from picking up my new (used) Fazer, spending ten minutes trying to start it, then remembering it's got an immobiliser. Embarassed

Happened to me with my 250r. I actually got it packed on the van and brought it to a garage, just to realise same evening how much I fucked up Laughing
So I go there next morning, turn off the immobiliser and bam, bike's working like a dream Doh!
I died inside a little... Embarassed And left one hell of a impression on the lads from the shop (I bet they still laugh inside every time they see me Laughing)
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