Smeg

[stonesie]

Would you like some toast?

[Mondeo Man]

How come no one told me?

[waffles]

I really looking forward to this, back filming in front of a live studio audience and the preview clips look pretty funny. Hell, it can't be any worse than the last one they threw out!

Also

"I haven't been this embarrassed since I was loosening my adjustment screws, and my entire groinal box dropped into Mr Rimmer's soup."
____________________
Theory test - 19/8/09, CBT - 11/10/09, MOD 1 - 16/8/10, MOD 2 - 27/10/10
Past rides Yamaha XT125X, Triumph TT600, Honda XR250
Current rides Suzuki GSXR 600, Honda MSX125

[sidewinder]

Sweet
____________________
"Nitrous is like a cheap hooker, you want to hit it but are scared of the consequences

[tbourner]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOFrFt5gKFw
____________________
Trev, now a biker?
Looking for first big bike.

[cornish]

Grind those balls sir! Grind them!!!





Also. . .

For god's sake Lister, it's as plain as a Bulgarian pin-up!!!
____________________
smile and be happy. . . .it gets right on everyone's tits!

[McJamweasel]

[MarJay]

[mistergixer]

[Tomzo47]

watched Queeg last night, only just remembered how funny it was! "we are talking, April, May, June, July and August fool!"
____________________
Ybr 125 > Bandit 650SA > GSXR 600 > Triumph Sprint St1050 > CB1300 > Z1000SX + FJ1200 (written off) > VFR750 >FJ1200

[_Will_]

https://uktv.co.uk/dave/video/aid/653214/videolistid/1/sr/1
____________________
Past -Honda qr50 | 2004 Peugeot Tkr s 50| | 1996 Yamaha XJ600s Diversion|

[Daniel Cain]

Kryten: Is it me or is that cockroach shuffling too loudly?

Rimmer: Kryten, it's called a hangover, don't panic...

Lister: We're on a mining ship, 3 million years into deep space. Can someone please tell me where the smeg I got this traffic cone?!

Cat: Hey, it's not a good night unless you get a traffic cone! It's the policewoman's helmet and the suspenders I don't understand!

The Last Day. One of my Fave's
____________________
I hear voices in my head. They council me, they understand. They talk to me.

[Flatbadger]

Queeg for me too, I hope Norman Lovett's in the new series.

The Junior Encyclopedia of Space?
____________________
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
You're in ISIS

[Alpha-9]

I liked them all, every series. Lapped it all up and the christmas specials and it was all delicious. Looking forward to this, shame I don't have TV, internet, avanté!
____________________
Fzr-600 1999

[Scooty]

Love Better Than Life, a great episode:

TAXMAN: Mister Rimmer?
RIMMER: (Weakly) Yes.
TAXMAN: Mister Arnold Judas Rimmer?
RIMMER: Yes.
TAXMAN: (Smiles) Outland Revenue, sir!
RIMMER: Oh my God!
TAXMAN: This is a demand for immediate payment.
RIMMER: Eighteen thousand?
TAXMAN: If you are unable to pay, sir, I am instructed by the Revenue to break both your legs and pull off your thumbs--sir.

https://sc1963.com/Red_Dwarf/episodes/dwarf08-10.jpg
____________________
Current Bike: 2018 Honda CRF250L
Ex-Bikes: 2002 Honda CG125, 1998 Honda VFR800, 2011 Honda CBR600F, 2013 Triumph Sprint GT SE, 2015 Kawasaki ZX10R

[_Will_]

[cornish]

During a recent teeth-gnashingly frustrating argument with the council my brain gave up and i started hearing Rimmer saying

"i think we all have something productive to bring to this discussion, but from now on i think the thing that you should bring is silence"



____________________
smile and be happy. . . .it gets right on everyone's tits!

[panrider_uk]

Only one more sleep peeps.
____________________
Current bikes: Honda ST1100 Pan European. Moto Guzzi V85 TT Travel

[stonesie]

Off topic but the adds at the bottom of the page for SMEG fridges raised a smile

[panrider_uk]

I have a Smeg cooker hood
____________________
Current bikes: Honda ST1100 Pan European. Moto Guzzi V85 TT Travel

[_Will_]

"Busy, Dave?"
"Well, yeah. I am, actually."
"Oh, then you won't want to know about the two super-light-speed fighters that are tracking us."
"What?!"
"I'll leave you to your bubble blowing, mate."
"No, Hol, come on, come on."
"They're from Earth."
"Three million years away?"
"They're from the NorWEB federation."
"What's that?"
"The North Western Electricity Board. They want you, Dave."
"Me? Why? What for?"
"For your crimes against humanity."
"You what!"
"It seems when you left Earth three million years ago, you left two half-eaten German sausages on a plate in your kitchen."
"Did I?"
"You know what happens to sausages left unattended for three million years?"
"Yeah. They go all mouldy."
"Your sausages, Dave, now cover seven-eighths of the Earth's surface. Also you left seventeen pounds, fifty pence in a bank account. Thanks to compound interest you now own ninety-eight percent of all the world's wealth, but since you've hoarded it for three million years nobody's got any money except for you and NorWEB."
"Why NorWEB? "
"You left a light on in the bathroom. I've got a final demand here for one hundred and eighty billion pounds."
"A hundred and eighty billion pounds! You're kidding!"
"April fool."
"But it's not April."
"Yeah, I know, but I could hardly wait six months with a red-hot jape like that under my belt."


____________________
Past -Honda qr50 | 2004 Peugeot Tkr s 50| | 1996 Yamaha XJ600s Diversion|

[Tomzo47]

just a heads up, this starts tonight on Dave, lets just hope its good
____________________
Ybr 125 > Bandit 650SA > GSXR 600 > Triumph Sprint St1050 > CB1300 > Z1000SX + FJ1200 (written off) > VFR750 >FJ1200

[supZ]

[_Will_]

I think they've rescued it from back to earth style disaster, some old style jokes there* - something small still missing from the good ol' days I can't put my finger on though, not bad though....not bad.

One thing they have overlooked, that background noise, the rumbling spacey rockety noise wasn't there so it lost a smidge of atmosphere.

*The moose one got a chuckle, it was as soon as Kat walked in
____________________
Past -Honda qr50 | 2004 Peugeot Tkr s 50| | 1996 Yamaha XJ600s Diversion|

[angryjonny]