Trouble with Stuck Up Neighbour

[Daniel Cain]

When I say "Stuck Up" what I mean is she thinks she's posh but she really is not.

She has been put up with for about 4 years now but yeaterday was the last straw.

My mother-in-law lives in quite a small Mews with 5 properties.

When this woman (and I use the term loosely. Think Lambent off GOW or Orcs off LOTR) moved in me and my wife were still living at her mothers. This Orc immediately thought she was the boss of the Mews and started dictating who could park where, said we should have meetings and such. The one thing that really got my back up was that she had a go at my (at the time) 3 year old daughter who was playing football inside the Mews with her 2 year old cousin. The ball was of the variety that goes 'PING' when you kick it and couldn’t damage a flower.

Basically a little Hitler.

We moved out about 3 and a half years ago but still this woman persists in psychologically tormenting my mother-in-law and father-in-law.

The thing that has put me over the edge was that she squared up to my Wife while I was at work. My son was ill so she took him to her mother’s while she sorted some stuff out. Comes to pick him back up, parks in the Mews for a whole 30 SECONDS while she gets him and belts him in and this little troglodyte starts having a go because she doesn't live there and shouldn't be parking there.

Now I need to keep the moral high ground so I need some advice on distance trolling. I've read some threads about posting incontinent pads etc., which will be done, however what other options are available?

Hence why I need some advice as I know the BCF massive are some of the best in this field. (And I mean that as a compliment!)
____________________
I hear voices in my head. They council me, they understand. They talk to me.

[map]

As always need more info, photos maybe and/or the BCF standard, paint diagram.

Is it a private road?
What are the road markings?
What is public road and what is private land?
Any other info welcome.

It is not unreasonable for there to be visitors at a home. Does she have any? Sounds like being a pratt. Ask her if she had any concentration guards in her family tree
____________________
...and the whirlwind is in the thorn trees, it's hard for thee to kick against the pricks...
Gibbs, what did Duckie look like when he was younger?

[Chalky.]

*Neighbour.

[Daniel Cain]

I'm at work atm so paint diagram will follow as soon as available along with additional info.

Well spotted Chalky, My spelling is atro....atrocio.....atroious......




Crap
____________________
I hear voices in my head. They council me, they understand. They talk to me.

[Joncrete Cungle]

When are in laws next on holiday? Next summer sometime? If they are arrange BCF meet / piss up. I am sure the neighbour concerned will be thrilled with loads of bikes and bikers turning up. Lighting a BBQ or two and opening a few beers before putting up their tents on the lawn to kip in. Run it by the other neighbours beforehand and don't be too much of a PITA for the good neighbours.

[cornish]

I'm no good at trolling suggestions beyond incontinence pants etc as you've suggested

Outside of this, is it worth trying to find a diplomatic way of seeing what the other neighbour's opinions of Adolf are? It is a god-awful pain in the arse going through the local council to make a complaint about anti-social behaviour but, if everyone is having similar problems it makes it a lot easier.

Also, if she thinks she's Lady Muck maybe even the suggestion of a complaint being made about her would be enough to make her wind her neck in a bit.

But, raising issues like that is a double-edged sword as once things like that start rolling relations will probably never be good so you have to balance up how bad it is now against how bad you think it might be if you made an official complaint

So, incontinence pants and leaflets about dementia might be the best way forward
____________________
smile and be happy. . . .it gets right on everyone's tits!

[arry]

At the risk of sounding all sensible, and all that bizzle; have you or any of your family actually tried going to talk to her face to face, in a polite manner, explaining your views and trying to reach some sort of compromise / solution?

[cornish]

That's actually a better idea than making a proper complaint. The neighbours i have problems with are of a different. . .erm. . . .sort. . .than the one you're describing. Knocking their door to politely ask for the dog to be walked so it's not barking constantly or the stereo to be turned down or children not to be threatened and chased etc would only get a gobful of sauce and expletives.

Different sort of environment might yield a different response. Maybe chat to other neighbours to see how the land lies with them then try a diplomatic chat.

Be prepared for an unpleasant response though so that if you do get one you aren't dragged into a dispute, it'll make things worse. Just have a pre-prepared way to leave politely if that's the case and give it up as a non-starter.
____________________
smile and be happy. . . .it gets right on everyone's tits!

[Daniel Cain]

[syl]

Are these houses owned or rented? If owned, who is likely to move house soonest? If your mother, I would suggest avoiding a dispute as it will reduce the value of the house and make it more difficult to sell when the time comes.
____________________
Current bike: Kawasaki Z750S

[killa]

Could install a big, blantant fake CCTV camera. She won't know it's fake.

Failing that, break her legs.
____________________
Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.
Bike:- Yamaha TRX850 | Killas Biking History | Killas Gaming History | Killas autmotive history

[map]

[Joenitro]

Pay some kids to brick her windows

[stinkwheel]

First off. Does she actually have any say in the parking or is it a public/adopted road.

If it is actually her parking. Stop parking there.

If it isn't, just ignore her. You can't have an argument by yourself and taking people like that on only feeds their craving for attention.

If she starts upping the ante by either taking it away from the street, or starting with any sort of language or behaviour that might cause "Fear, alarm or disrtress." Record the date, time and nature of each incident in a diary so you can equip the local council with the evidence to apply for an ASBO.

One I'd find interesting is If she starts banging on the door and it's set back off the street, you can withdraw her implied right of access to your door in writing. Then if she sets foot on your property (assuming you are in England or Wales), she is tresspassing and you have a common law right to use reasonable force to remove her.
____________________
“Rule one: Always stick around for one more drink. That's when things happen. That's when you find out everything you want to know.”
I did the 2010 Round Britain Rally on my 350 Bullet. 89 landmarks, 3 months, 9,500 miles.

[Daniel Cain]

Ok bad paint diagram:

https://cdn.bikechatforums.com/files/cow.png

She lives at Number 1.
She owns Number 2 and rents it out.
Mother-in-law lives at 4.

Numbers 3+5 are decent people. I think she gets on with 5. not sure about 3.

I just seems like she has a problem with us.

There are no road markings inside the Mews and I believe is is private land, but shared responsibility with the 5 properties.

There are no specific parking places but people tend to park courteously (spelling?). If my family goes there for an extended mount of time (sunday lunch, etc.) we park on the street. My gripe is my wife parked behind her mothers car and she flipped her lid over been there for 30 seconds to pick up my sick 4 year old.
____________________
I hear voices in my head. They council me, they understand. They talk to me.

[Daniel Cain]

I dont want a confrontation as I would surrender the moral high ground hence the request for ideas for distance trolling
____________________
I hear voices in my head. They council me, they understand. They talk to me.

[Rogerborg]

You're not interested in the moral high ground, and you're no better than Lady Snoot for pretending that you are.

Don't stir from a distance, deal with it like an adult. Find out and be 100% sure of the rights and the wrongs, then face her down, nose to snout if necessary.

If you won't do that, then leave it, you're only sowing trouble for other people to reap.
____________________
Biking is 1/20th as dangerous as horse riding.
GONE: HN125-8, LF-250B, GPz 305, GPZ 500S, Burgman 400 // RIDING: F650GS (800 twin), Royal Enfield Bullet Electra 500 AVL, Ninja 250R because racebike

[Daniel Cain]

[map]

[Raffles]

[_mjs_]

[Marmalade]

Just get an ann summers catalogue, post it to her with a covering letter saying

"please refer to page (with vibs on) for a relief to your tension. Not getting any cock is no excuse to be such a stuck up obnoxious bitch. Give yourself a good seeing to and get over it.

Yours

A friend"
____________________
Nobby the Bastard: How yo tell the difference between the actual japanese and her just screaming because she's had live fish stuck up her arse? [url=https://www.nicks-shop.co.uk/bcf-goodies-15-c.aspGet BCF stickers and things here[/url] Reflective helmet stickers - Legal requirement in france - Clicky

[Flatbadger]

[pepperami]

[bazza]

Cultivate your thousand-yard stare.
____________________
"That's it. You people have stood in my way long enough. I'm going to clown college."
'98 Ducati 750SS, '08 Suzuki GSX650F ©2004-2014, Bazza's Harmless Banter