Your local nutcase

[Ariel Badger]

Ours is Mad Malik (google him) he has been dancing on my street corner for over 20 years and bashing car roofs in with a variety of weapons over that period.I like Malik but have been the occasional victim of a pick axe handle attack.
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Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

[Benno]

Malik? Malik Agar?

https://img.timeinc.net/time/daily/2011/1109/boswell_sudan_0902.jpg
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I'm autistic. That means I'm smarter than you.

[ocatoro]

that is the blackest man i've ever laid eyes on. please tell me that photo is desaturated
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CBT - 17/09/12 * Theory - 23/10/12 * Mod1 - 05/03/13 * Mod2 - 25/03/13 * BOSH!
Current - None but shed project H100 (first bike )
Past - ER5, '93 ZZR600, '92 CB400 SF, ZZR600 (again), yellow Monster 620, Blackbird - black Monster 620ie - '96 ZZR600

[Joenitro]

Ours is called purple aki. Can't put a picture up as I'm on my phone but worth googling as he's a very scarey man.

He has a thing for feeling young lad's muscles. He tried to make me do some squats for him when I was about 15 but I ran off.

[Ariel Badger]

"Mad Malik is the stuff of legend indeed. Armed with his battery-less walkman and swaying in time to his own very special music, Malik has graced the streets of East Birmingham and particularly the Bordesely area for over twenty years.
Football fans, motorists and shoppers have stood in amazement as Malik throws shapes that would put a professional to shame but however much he entertains the public Babylon have little time for him. They object when he approaches motorists with his 'Kukamaka' stick and demands cigarettes or cash. They have gone as far as arresting him!
It does not worry the motorists, who in fact have been known to queue to earn a few dents in their car roofs from the said stick, this being viewed by the drivers as a mark of 'respect' from one as famous as Malik. It is even believed that young men. having passed their driving test go up to Green Lane for Malik's own physical endorsement of this rite of passage.
He is without doubt a star in the firmament of local culture and firmly deserves a tribute on this exceptional site. Dance you crazy fool, dance!!"
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Bikers make great organ donors, get 115 on your licence today.

[cyberglass]

Hey Joenitro purple aki was let out a month or so ago that guy really is famous in all the north west lol
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DL650 Vstrom 2004
DRZ400S 2003
Yamaha R1 2005

[Joenitro]

[cyberglass]

I still remember my mums warnings if your out after dark purple aki will come and get you haha
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DL650 Vstrom 2004
DRZ400S 2003
Yamaha R1 2005

[Joenitro]

[Benno]

[Carl_steveo]

We've got Dave the Rave, stands on street corners with an iPod not listening to any music and raves. He's also deeply religious so he's always got his hands in the prayer position.

Shit quality YouTube link

The other one is bag man.

https://farm4.static.flickr.com/3314/3560748457_f0a1948dab.jpg

Last time I saw him he had twice as many bags. He does shuttle runs carrying a few at a time about the streets. Sleeps rough but the travel lodge lets him have a shower, I've seen him dry his towels on the island railings out the back of the hotel.
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Current: Honda Nsr 125
Live: Sunderland
Luke "cant be arsed to read your post, but suck my balls anyway."

[Alpha-9]

[CaNsA]

[Joncrete Cungle]

Toxic Terry.

https://4.bp.blogspot.com/_3I_wJNG-F4g/SaJyJQ0KkvI/AAAAAAAAAFo/VhikxQshaXA/s320/terry.jpg

https://www.lep.co.uk/news/local/toxic-terry-back-in-court-1-79677

[WannaBeDude]

[TheSmiler]

[cornish]

We've got several down here. We also have a Dave The Rave always dancing, wears headphones, legwarmers, shorts etc, basically what i used to wear roller-skating when i was a kid in the 80's

The one down the road from us was ALWAYS on the bus no matter what time of the day i caught it (fook me i hate pubic transport). Completely lala, thousand yard stare, conversations with herself the whole shebang. Despite having that 'i could flip out and stab you any minute' air tho i do like her. She's mahoosive, but dresses very much like she is a teeny tiny twig person. Bra top, belt skirt that kind of thing, bits hanging out. Makes the bus drivers stare in disbelief which used to make me chortle.

In the winter (covered-up) i'm dead envious of her. She puts outfits together beautifully. Last time i saw her she had gogo boots, red tights, sheepskin coat, headscarf and a sort of multi-layered arrangement of jersey dress, little skirt, top etc. Sounds sh1te but looked cracking

Shaggy Maggie is a kind of bog-standard career alcoholic type mental. Yelling at cars, yelling at coppers (i'll admit that one's usually funny), starts every sentence with "aaaaayerfuckin. . ." etc. But has had some more colourful appearances since the 'free-bus-pass and more money' approach to alcoholism came into force. Keeps her in booze and helps her get round a bit

I noticed when using pubic transport that social services down here are pretty woeful for adult care. They're all out wandering round on the buses all day with their free-passes on a chain around their neck, where people like me have to talk to them (fook me the seek me out ) Call me sh1tty and unreasonable but i don't like it when someone sits next to me and talks to me, at all. Using "you look like my carer. . ." as their opening gambit doesn't soften me up much
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smile and be happy. . . .it gets right on everyone's tits!

[neatbik]

Ours is called 'Sky', aka Kevin Bayliss -
https://www.westmercia.police.uk/assets/cached/images/160x200x95/244T714T840/mar_12/wmp__1332501920_Kevin_Bayliss.jpg

Regulary found sitting in shop doorways, pissed up, and shouting abuse at passers by. Occasionally he will attack people too.

I have encountered him many times over the last few years, but only once did he piss me off enough for me to hit him.

In all honesty he is a menace, he intimidates people and should not be on the streets.

https://www.westmercia.police.uk/news/news-articles/malvern-man-given-crasbo-for-being-drunk-and-abusive.html

[WannaBeDude]

Cornish, did you know of a long haired 50 year old plus bloke down there, who always says he,s living in a mushroom.
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Jogging on, destination living.

[The Artist]

How about local scary dude with a heart of gold. Where I used to live near (Nantwich), there was Flash. He was 6ft8 or something, generally huge and imposing. Walked around town wearing a modern day equivalent of a burlap sack. Long scraggly hair, and the sort of guy you wouldn't want to piss off.

I asked my mate who lives there if she had seen him and she told me that he goes round all day collecting recyclable materials and useful stuff like rope and bottles and then sold them for charity. Supposedly quite well off himself, he just spends his days helping the community.

[Skudd]

Our local nutters keep away from me................. they don't like it when you go as batshit mental as they go.

In my view they are very calculated in the way that they act.
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Famous last words of Humpty Dumpty. " Stop pushing me "
Petty Anarchists look at "1984".............. The Visionary looks at "Animal Farm".

[cornish]

[cornish]

[Bubbs]

Ours is known as Mad Dog.

Dont have a photo of him. He basically looks like Vivian from the young ones.

https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6ymi5-6VZHo/TXjcJ-RX0BI/AAAAAAAAAGA/x0mTGAiGiUQ/s1600/Vivian.jpg

He has 3 dogs. He talks to anyone he passes and is quite friendly up until his wild dog persona kicks in.

Typical sentence:

"Alright butt, I'm just going down the shop I am, and getting myself a Grrrrrrrrrrr, *lots of barking*, a lottery ticket *barking*"

He's been doing it since I first saw him back in year 7 of school. I'm now 28 and he still does it. Funny but odd.


My wife told me about a guy down her way in Molesey. A guy can't go past you without saying good bye. It's like he's trying his best not to say anything and then as soon as he's about past you he shouts "Goodbye!"

We speculated what must be going through his mind. Lets say his name is Brian.

Voices in head
"Ok Brian, there's a couple walking towards me... Now don't say goodbye. You can do this Brian... Come on your almost there, almost past them. I don't know if I can....."

*shouts*
"GOODBYE!!!"

"...Dammit Brian! Ok theres another couple..."
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Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

[grant965]