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Flying Faeces

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zico
Nitrous Nuisance



Joined: 28 Sep 2015
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PostPosted: 00:09 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Flying Faeces Reply with quote
Today was a highlight in my life.

Whilst riding past a park I felt something hit my helmet. It initially scared me but I rode on and thought no more about it.

Fast forward 20 minutes in heavy traffic and I walk in the front door and greet the family. At that point the screaming and running started. The side and back of my helmet was covered in shit, as was the back of my jacket. Someone had literally thrown shit at me.

I'm guessing it was some whipper snappers in the park. It's time for a cull.

Edit - I just realised when I posted this how appropriate my avatar is...
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Ste
Not Work Safe



Joined: 01 Sep 2002
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PostPosted: 00:14 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Re: Flying Faeces Reply with quote
zico wrote:
someone took a shit on me and I didn't notice until it was pointed out to me
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Fin
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Joined: 27 Feb 2016
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PostPosted: 00:16 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
I take it it was dog shit
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zico
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PostPosted: 00:18 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Finternet wrote:
I take it it was dog shit


I'd imagine so. I hadn't considered alternative shit sources until just now.
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Ste
Not Work Safe



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PostPosted: 00:25 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
You don't know the source? Don't worry, BCF can help.

Where's catshit hands?

He'll stick his hands in it and will be able to identify which animal it came from. Thumbs Up

mpd72... your skillz are needed!!
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Undinist
Nearly there...



Joined: 08 Oct 2013
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PostPosted: 00:52 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Re: Flying Faeces Reply with quote
zico wrote:
I'm guessing it was some whipper snappers in the park. It's time for a cull.


Maybe they raided a dogshit bin? You should stake it out with an air rifle, Trainspotting-style. But just shoot the yoots. (Shooting dogs is cruel.)
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Silver_Fox
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Joined: 03 Jun 2015
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PostPosted: 14:10 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Notting Hill is really going downhill
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baderlfc
Borekit Bruiser



Joined: 12 Aug 2015
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PostPosted: 14:19 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Well that's a possible hazard of biking i never considered!
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Silver_Fox
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PostPosted: 15:03 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
I personally never consider a shit outcome
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ADSrox0r
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Joined: 23 Oct 2012
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PostPosted: 18:54 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
You need one of these....

https://3.bp.blogspot.com/_V2mQw4g6WrQ/SquHft5LD1I/AAAAAAAAANY/wMZXc87YbJU/s320/08-bike_415x275.jpg
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zico
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Joined: 28 Sep 2015
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PostPosted: 18:56 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Or this...

https://img.diytrade.com/cdimg/788252/9054727/0/1242620510/Motorcycle_Umbrella_Advertising_Umbrella.jpg
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Hefty
Could Be A Chat Bot



Joined: 25 Jun 2013
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PostPosted: 19:44 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
https://i.imgur.com/QABfFRC.png
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zico
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PostPosted: 19:55 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hefty wrote:
https://i.imgur.com/QABfFRC.png


As you get older you'll understand. Three consecutive days of reasonably firm shits is an achievement.
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Hefty
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PostPosted: 20:34 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Couldn't find you here..? potentially nsfw
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Last edited by Hefty on 20:38 - 08 Mar 2016; edited 1 time in total
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zico
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Joined: 28 Sep 2015
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PostPosted: 20:37 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Now we're just talking shit
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Val
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PostPosted: 21:45 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Have you ever considered the possibility it may have been a ginormous pigeon?
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zico
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PostPosted: 22:37 - 08 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Val wrote:
Have you ever considered the possibility it may have been a ginormous pigeon?


If it was then that pigeon needs to reevaluate his dietary intake.
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talkToTheHat
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PostPosted: 01:15 - 09 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
At least shit is soft. The local yoof like to throw bricks and full drinks cans. Fortunately their aim is shit.
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Silver_Fox
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PostPosted: 09:57 - 09 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
talkToTheHat wrote:
At least shit is soft. The local yoof like to throw bricks and full drinks cans. Fortunately their aim is shit.



Council estates have changed if they can now afford to throw full cans Laughing
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BTTD
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Joined: 22 Nov 2012
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PostPosted: 10:49 - 09 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Silver_Fox wrote:
talkToTheHat wrote:
At least shit is soft. The local yoof like to throw bricks and full drinks cans. Fortunately their aim is shit.



Council estates have changed if they can now afford to throw full cans Laughing


I doubt they're full of drink......
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Silver_Fox
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PostPosted: 12:16 - 09 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Ewwww Laughing Laughing Laughing
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talkToTheHat
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PostPosted: 15:41 - 09 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Silver_Fox wrote:
Council estates have changed if they can now afford to throw full cans Laughing


The cheap supermarkets have become co-ops. These are great for the economy as people with expensive cars drive there, buy the overpriced merchandise and have their cars/parts of cars/contents of cars stolen by the locals. This also becomes a convenient source of projectiles such as eggs and drinks cans for the local wildlings. If anyone thinks these are paid for haven't quite grasped the extent of the issue. Of course, the trick is to send the smallest wildling to retrieve projectiles as even if they can't count birthdays they stand a good chance of being under ten. This doesnt work in family-run corner shops where the security is a huge dog and a weapon of opportunity carefully stashed under the counter.
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Silver_Fox
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PostPosted: 15:46 - 09 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
My god man where do you live, Bradford? Laughing
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duhawkz
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PostPosted: 17:02 - 09 Mar 2016    Post subject: Reply with quote
Are you sure it was thrown at you, you could have just ridden past bodyguard having a conversation after all the amount of shit that comes of his mouth could easily splatter passing traffic.
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FFLM Mark
L Plate Warrior



Joined: 03 Mar 2016
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PostPosted: 22:16 - 09 Mar 2016    Post subject: Dirty buggers! Reply with quote
Pikies I suspect! Their into that sort of malarky - dirty buggers! Rolling Eyes
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Old Thread Alert!

The last post was made 9 years, 287 days ago. Instead of replying here, would creating a new thread be more useful?
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